Crash tales. What happened and why

[Patch]

I've fallen off more times than I can remember.

My last crash I don't remember at all (Taupo Race track Dec 06), all I do remember is flying thru the air.
A couple of months later my head stopped hurting (something to do with my brain smashing into my skull causing the pain and unseen damage) my collar bone had healed, but my back still hurt (had fractured L4 & L5, causing nerve damage)

Today I still feel the effects of concussion and the odd twinge in my spine. I may fully recover I might not, but I'm still here.


Falling off is sometimes funny (in hindsight), but crashing is not.


Moral of my story - save the limit testing for the track. I have no idea whose (the bike or my) limits I was testing that day. Thankfully I had friends to help me thru my mistake. They know more of what happened than I do.



Take my post for what it is, my experience, my lesson, my advice - The safest place is the track. Crashing hurts, its a long slow road to recovery . . . . if you survive.

[Number One]

Not a crash per se...but a drop nonetheless. Nothing as dramatic or life threatening as other stories....man some of those scarey...Jim2 esp!

Anyway this was just embarrassing but found that I was not alone with this at the time so will share for the benefit of lesser mortals like myself



Loooonnng time ago when I took my very first bike for it's very first drink I pulled up at the Mobil. Got off and filled up...all hunky dory. Had my bike a sum total of about 24 hours and was still feeling pretty damn chuffed - shit I was cool...a chick on a bike...yeah I can see you staring over there my Ute man....wondering if I really am a dyke on a bike. ANyway - pay spotty station attendant. Put gloves and helmet back on....twit in front still not finished phaffing about at his pump, parked real bad. Decide I'll back up.

FIRST learners lesson about pushing bikes: GET OFF BIKE FIRST! THEN PUSH - you are not stable enough straddled your machine...especially when you not yet really used to moving your bike around.

SO there I am Straddled my 'beast' I pushed off to go backwards, foot got trapped on PUMP island, bike went over, now trapped under bike with foot caught...MR ute man can you please come and pick this up off me please....thankyou so much - SHAME!

SECOND learners leson about gas stations (particularly Mobil): The pump islands are shaped like bones (kinda) fat ends...watch where you put your feet!

[vifferman]

Fark! Grrrrr! That Satan! (no, not him - the other one!
He tricked me into forgetting some stuff that he did.

The first bike I bought, ended up in the owner's rose garden after the test ride. Satan done it! He was trying to make me actually fall into a rose bush, and whilst untangling myself the owner would come out and catch me, but he underestimated my embarrassment and desire to not be found out.

And then there was the time I was riding in The Swampe, doing trials-type stuff (Oh OK - I was just playing at it, alright? Happy now?!?) and a Satan reached out of the bog with one of his claws (disguised as a piece of rusty barbed wire), and grabbed me by the ankle. Oh how I did laugh. Y'see, I'd forgotten to wear boots, and the claw easily sliced through my (non-armoured) sock, and the tender skin underneath.

And that brings to mind the repressed repressions of other off-road excursions, such as when I worked for the Gubmint on a SheepTorturingStation, devising new ways to punish them for their evil and pernicious pernicity and evilness. Oh how I (didn't) laugh as I stood there in befuddled bewilderment after Satan shoulder-barged me into the electric fence.

But I didn't laugh even more on the times when I had to cart sheep in the trailer: bikes, trailers, hills and EvilSheep do NOT mix. So don't try this at home (or anywhere else), even with StuntSheep, not even dead StuntingSheep.

My virginal Bike+Trailer+Hills+Sheep was, I guess, a trial run. Well... a trial I'd have liked to run away from.
"You! Boy!" (I wasn't Vifferdork in those days) "Go and collect those dead EvilStuntSheep from that paddock OverYonder!"

[Incidentally, when I was in Mrka in Xmas, 2006, I inadvertantly came across a place called Santa's Little Village (Formerly known as Satan's Little Village, but the name was hastily changed just for Xmas, to lure hapless travellers). And in Satan's Little Village (presumably of Doom, Death and Destruction) there was a road called Old Way Up Yonder Road. No, this is one time I'm NOT lying.]

So, off I set into the aforementioned PaddockOverYonder (although it took me several hours, because I couldn't locate the Yonder), and quicklyish located the sheep, due to the unique and unpleasant Eau de Mort they were wearing. They were at the bottom end of the paddock, natcherly.
So, I loaded 'em up, sang a few choruses of the "Rawhide" song, girded my loins and loined my girdles, and set off.

Wah-HEY!!

The EvilStuntSheep must've just been playing possum (evil ones, natch), and not dead at all, for now they were all at the back of the trailer. Natcherly (of course), as they bounced up'n'down in the back of the trailer, this made the front of the trailer very light, lifting the back of the bike up.
Natcherly, the laws of physics not being suspended just because I was in the presence of Satan and his EvilStuntSheep, this meant the bike had no traction on the (literally) shitty grass, and I fell over, the bike ran backwards, and the trailer came off and ran away a bit.
Satan laughed. Prick.

So, I retrieved my wits, my dignity (such as it was, now that I was all shitty of mood and clothing), and the trailer, and tried again. This time, I tied the sheep up, seeing as they obviously didn't know they were dead and shouldn't be moving around. I also tied them to the cage of the trailer.

And off we go.

Waaah! Heeeeyyyyyy!

The sheep are now (semi)behaving, but the trailer has too much weight on the drawbar, which pushes down on the back of the mighty AG100, and causes me to have no steering, courtesy of the front wheel of my mighty stallion pawing at the air, as it were.

[sigh...]

So, while I'm sitting there on the ground, in the sheepshit, there comes a mighty roaring, a TERRIBLE gnarsty noise, seemingly from the very demons of hell! WTF is Satan up to this time?!?

A top-dressing plane flies over, and top-dresses the very paddock I'm in.
Great! Just fooking great!
You, Satan, are an EvilTwunt!

But you knew that...

FootlingNote: Yes, yes, I know some of you who have made it this far through this sorry tale want to know "What happened to the EvilStuntSheep, Mister?" :spudwhat:
Well, eventually, desperation triumphed over TheKingdomOfDarkness, and I dragged each sheep one at a time up to the gate, then the trailer, then put the whole thing back together, and delivered the EvilStuntingSheep back to Satan, via a very deep and smelly Secret Portal, known to us Gummint Sheep Torturing Station workers as The Offal Hole.

The End.
But not of my SheepvsTrailer Adventures, as the4re were very many more of those. Eventually, I became a master of Sitting on the tank and wheelying/wheelspinning my way over the most difficult of terrain, with the securely-tied sheeps bouncing away in the trailer behind me.

[James Deuce]

I know about countersteering, and i know now not to brake in turns, jim2.

Stand the bike up and stop. Don't fanny about braking while leaned over.

My comment was that it isn't body weight that steers the bike, it's controlled inputs at the handle bars. If you want more lean, you dial it up at the bars, not by hanging your arse off.

[mowgli]

What pisses me off is when you're scanning ahead and you think "what if that guy ..." then a couple of seconds later it happens just as you imagined. Only trouble is your initial thoughts weren't translated into any sort of defensive stance so instead of simply stopping or riding around now I'm in having to take emergency steps. So far no bins but there have been a number of situations where I could have easily avoided throwing out the picks.

I'm now trying to act on those early signs even if all I do is move a couple of feet in the lane or roll off a little throttle. Eventually it should become instinctive but this seems to be a pretty hard nut to crack. Practise, practise, practise me tinks.

[vifferman]

What pisses me off is when you're scanning ahead and you think "what if that guy ..."

When following, don't take the same track as the guy in front of you (offset it a bit) and don't follow too closely.

When you're riding, it's a good idea to run little "escape scenarios" through your head: "If that car comes over the centre line, I could ride off the road there"; "If that tractor pulls out onto the road, there's enough of a gap there", "If Satan pushes Vifferdork off the road here, I'll go to the right".

This does two things: it helps make you aware of potential dangers, and it helps you to establish a mindset of focusing on solutions, not the problem. In an accident, too many people look at the approaching vehicle or whatever instead of a way of avoiding it.

Say the guy in front of you bins: the most common reaction is to stare at his bike crashing, which means you'll invariably follow. Instead, switch your gaze to the best route away from where the crash is occurring.

[Number One]

When following, don't take the same track as the guy in front of you (offset it a bit) and don't follow too closely.

When you're riding, it's a good idea to run little "escape scenarios" through your head: "If that car comes over the centre line, I could ride off the road there"; "If that tractor pulls out onto the road, there's enough of a gap there", "If Satan pushes Vifferdork off the road here, I'll go to the right".

This does two things: it helps make you aware of potential dangers, and it helps you to establish a mindset of focusing on solutions, not the problem. In an accident, too many people look at the approaching vehicle or whatever instead of a way of avoiding it.

Say the guy in front of you bins: the most common reaction is to stare at his bike crashing, which means you'll invariably follow. Instead, switch your gaze to the best route away from where the crash is occurring.

AND above all else - look out for Satan Aye VMan?

[mowgli]

... too many people look at the approaching vehicle or whatever instead of a way of avoiding it.

So true! There is this one one corner on my commute where the road turns back on itself. There are manhole covers, tar banding, paint and the surface is channelled where successive vehicles have caused the seal to slide a little. It used to give me the shits every time I came to it. I'd creep round at about 25-30 when in a cage I would easily go around at 50.

It dawned on me one day (after reading some advice on here) to look less at the hazards and look through the corner. Now I can easily go around that corner at 50+ in the dry while still avoiding most of the hazards. I was focussed on the hazards and not the corner!

Dumbass noob! Probably a good way to learn the lesson though. It's certainly stuck pretty good.

[vifferman]

It dawned on me one day (after reading some advice on here) to look less at the hazards and look through the corner.

Guess what?
"What, Vifferdork? Tell me! Please....."
Where you look works on a less 'macro' level too. If you look at a pothole, or a piece of wood on the road, that are vaguely in your path, you'll almost certainly NOT miss it.
Gravel on the road? - Look for a clear piece of road next to the gravel patch.
Wet roads? - Look at the road between the giant slippery letters / symbols painted on the road when you ride over them. If you need to brake, your tyres won't be on them. Similarly, spot the diesel spills, antifreeze slicks etc. then make a point of focusing on clean bits of road.

Eventually, you'll end up with a habit of looking WAAAAY ahead through corners, while briefly flicking a glance over the road surface to scan for hazards, then if there are any, being aware of their location while focusing away from where they are, then return your gaze back to looking ahead through the corner.

[slick]

Distractions have been a major factor in most of my prangs!

1. bloke jumps a red light so while I'm giving him what for as I pull away I don't see the woman who also decides to jump the lights, T-bone! RS250 write-off

2. near-miss on the way to work, too busy thinking 'what if I'd been a millisecond earlier, I'd be dead, that was bloody close....' not concentrating on what I'm doing, 10 minutes later I'm in an ambulance. R1 write-off

Lesson = concentrate on the here and now, not where you've been or what other people have done, where am I 'going' and what are people 'going' to do.

Target fixation is a nasty one, easy to say look for an escape route, not what you're trying to avoid, but instincts are difficult to ignore especially when you've only got milliseconds to make a decision, I've tried and failed several times!

[FROSTY:Me]

Ok so you guys have told the stories where you've been "lucky"
Heres one where "I" wasn't so lucky.
" I" was out riding on my own. "I" had been riding for only 4 months but my freinds told me I was a very good rider.
Out to prove how well I could ride I was riding on a tricky bit of road.
I miscalculated my corner speed,the tightness of the bend My lack of experience meant I diddnt lean deeper into the corner or brake to wash off speed so the corner was able to be taken.
"i" crossed the center line to the point I was in the middle of the oncoming lane.
A car coming the other way wasnt able to brake in time and I hit his car front and center.
I died at the scene

[ital916]

Stand the bike up and stop. Don't fanny about braking while leaned over.

My comment was that it isn't body weight that steers the bike, it's controlled inputs at the handle bars. If you want more lean, you dial it up at the bars, not by hanging your arse off.

I understand what your daying, and i know you have to turn the bars on the bike to turn. I just find if i shift my weight i don't have to "dial" it in as much, i.e i don't have to apply a lot of turn to the bars, if worse come to worse then, i'll just apply all i can ot the bars and lean the bike fully over..sorted. Thanks for the advice though.

[skelstar]

I understand what your daying, and i know you have to turn the bars on the bike to turn. I just find if i shift my weight i don't have to "dial" it in as much, i.e i don't have to apply a lot of turn to the bars, if worse come to worse then, i'll just apply all i can ot the bars and lean the bike fully over..sorted. Thanks for the advice though.

All thats happening is when you're shifting your weight to the inside of the bike and promoting the countersteering by changing your arm/shoulder/bars geometry (as I understand it). This is covered pretty well in another thread (I think the 'moving weight' one). Well worth understanding whats going on (as you probably do).

[Ixion]

Whilst doubtless well intentioned, and with much respect to the OP, nonetheless I feel that such a thread as this is of negative benefit as far as survival goes.

It reinforces the attitude that crashing is "a bit of a joke"; something that happens to everyone.

After all, here's all these experienced riders yarning about all the crashes they've had. They're still here,aren't they; none the worse for it. Or at worst, a few scars, and chicks dig scars, right.

So, crashing's no big deal, eh. Gonna happen, and so what if it does, Just gotta make sure you've got insurance for the bike, and wear the Magic Gear.

The tales we need to hear are the ones that won't be posted. Because the posters aren't around anymore. Or , if they are, they're too busy just drooling away and waiting for someone to change their adult nappies.

Certainly , sometimes people walk away from crashes with no more than minor injuries, and a good tale to tell at the pub.

But it doesn't always happen that way

Other times, you don't walk away at all. Ever. And all that's left is for your parents or partner to bury you. And your kids to grow up wondering what the Dad (or Mum) they never really knew would have been like. Or your parents to keep your photo always on the sideboard, and choke back a sob when they look at it on what would have been your birthday.

Other times, you don't die. Unfortunately. Because the rest of your "life" will be as a vegetable. With no consiousness except a constant unremitting pain. And your partner comes to see you every day. Until eventually - he or she decides there's no point. And finds someone else. And then all you've got, and all you'll ever have, is the pain. And the tubes.

Other times, it's not so bad. Sort of. Just a life changing and life limiting experience that means for the rest of your life you'll have pain as a constant reminder. And find there's a lot of stuff that you can't do any more. And your friends (And partner. And kids) don't really want to know you any more , because you're "strange". And "hard to live with". And you can't do your job any more. So the rest of your life is going to be scraping by on a benefit. In a caravan park somewhere. or a cheap boarding house.

Those are the realities of crashing. It's not funny, it's not smart, and it's not inevitable

I don't have any crash tales to tell, sorry. And I mean to try really hard to keep things that way. I hope that the young riders starting out never get to have any crash tales, either.

[Katman]

Whilst doubtless well intentioned, and with much respect to the OP............
..............I hope that the young riders starting out never get to have any crash tales, either.

Excellent post.