Dumb things bikers can do?

[jcupit69]

Done that!

It's not good!

Even worse after just spendin $700 for a respray

[steveb64]

Done the disc lock thing twice - first time took out a big chunk of carbon fibre front mudguard - luckily just rolling the bike, not riding off, unlike the second one which took out the rear disc. Luckily, I didn't drop it either time - and for some strange reason, I don't use a disc lock any more.

My best one was when I was in Dunedin on a training course, and had my bike (Honda CB750F1) with me - planning to do a ride around the South Island and the 3 main passes over Easter... I'd been in a tramping store, getting some stuff for the trip, went back to the bike, took gloves out of helmet, put helmet on, went to put key in ignition - no key. Shit. Start walking back to shop - searching all the way - search all through the shop - nothing. Walk back to bike - still nothing. Walk back to shop again - borrow phone (in the days before cell phones), call McIver and Veitch (Honda dealers) to see if they had any spare keys... "Sure, a big box full!". Walk to McIver's (2 - 3km), get box of keys, walk back to bike, first key works! Put box of keys in tank bag, put on helmet, put on gloves, and ... find my bloody keys! Damn things had gone straight in the end of one of my gloves when I'd chucked them into my helmet...

[justsomeguy]

She really started CRYING? Like tear tear crying? If so, that is some funny shit. I gotta try that sometime

She backed right away from the counter, eyes got a bit glazed and her voice turned into a squeak.

[klingon]

Ha ha this is the funniest thread I've read in a long time. I, of course, have never done anything dumb

[MsKABC]

Running out of petrol half way up the Bombay Hills and having to walk to the Caltex at the top....in full leathers....in the middle of summer. At least I could jump the fence and walk up the old Gt Sth Rd instead of suffering the indignity of walking up the side of the m/way.

Just running my bike one day, not even riding it, when I lost my balance on a slightly sloped, gravel surface. Flatmate stood behind me and watched me drop it on the ground, didn't even try and save me, b*****d Burnt my (bare) leg on the pipe. Cracked the fairing and broke an indicator light

Giving my students a contextual lesson in physics (sound, friction, energy transformations etc) using my bike as the context. Started it up and revved hell out of it....under the Principal's office window It was a big hit with the students however.

Dropping my bike during a slow-speed manouvre when I was test-riding it out with the bike shop owner. Hey - at least I bought it!

Ummmm, I think that's about it.

[Nagash]

Oh, one night I got a call at like 1am from a mate who had gotten himself trapped at a party begging for a ride back to his place, I made the mistake of agreeing, picked the mate up and dropped him home. On the way back to my place the motor died.. I had run outta gas and forgotten it was already on reserve!

Pushed the bike for about half an hour to the nearest 24 hour gas station which was pre-pay, went to pay the gentlemen and checked my back pocket.. I had forgotten my wallet. Begged the man for just $2 of fuel and he could hold my rather expensive watch in return but he wouldn't budge. Had to walk two hours to get home.

Grabbed my wallet and looked for a faster way to get back.. I'm a roller blader and saw one of my roller blades, unfortunately I could only find 1.. strapped it on anyway and rolled all the way back at 3 in the morning on one roller blade. Got some bloody interesting looks I tell yah.

Finally made it back and gave the guy a right bollocking about trust issues even though it wasn't his fault.. Just in a real bad mood.

That was a very painful evening.

[DougB]

I think I have posted this tale before.

I borrowed a bike from a friend and went to town on a friday night to get stuff. The town (Kawakawa) was full of people, as was always the case on friday nights many years ago.

Got my stuff and kick started the two stroke, I noticed a cough from the carby. but took no notice. Into gear and away - the dam thing had started up backwards and I was deposited in a heap on the road before hundreds of amused people.

[Gremlin]

Walked into St Lukes Mall ASB branch after a long ride in full biker gear.

Didn't realise I was wearing it.

Black helmet, black balaclava, black cordura jacket and pant, black gloves and boots.

The little Asian lady at reception started crying.

You got as far as the counter? I always walk in, in full gear, to do fast deposits I have already filled out, but never been suicidal enought to try for the counter

For me...

Leaving a bike badly parked on its sidestand, knowing it was too upright, wanting to move it (even checked and pushed it as far over as possible several times). Waited to be able to park it properly, went inside to get keys (5m away), and as I reached for them... I heard the crash

Messing with the bike, installing extra things, and didn't realise I left a bolt that had the earth wire for the PCIII very loose. Moral: Bikes run like shit, and you think you have broken very expensive things. Mood was ... extremely happy... when I found out, and it didn't take a shop visit to figure it out.

Taking an hour to fit a tail fairing to a bike, in the dark, finally get it, only to drop the second last bolt into the fairing. The whole thing came off again, and I think the whole neighbourhood heard me swearing.

[martybabe]

You got as far as the counter? I always walk in, in full gear, to do fast deposits I have already filled out, but never been suicidal enought to try for the counter

For me...

Leaving a bike badly parked on its sidestand, knowing it was too upright, wanting to move it (even checked and pushed it as far over as possible several times). Waited to be able to park it properly, went inside to get keys (5m away), and as I reached for them... I heard the crash

twice I've had my back to it and heard that gut wrenching sound. wtf, please let it be something else! Mind you it's a good job I didn't see it fall,I'd have chucked meself under it.

[slopster]

Eating a pinapple lump with a tight helmet on. as I bit into the chewy lolly my cheeks got pushed into my mouth and I bit them fucking hard.

Riding off the interislander and got my leg caught in one of the truck tie down chains and dragged off the back of my bike and watched the bike ride away on its own for the next 20m or so. All the cars had to wait for me to pick the bike up and get it started before they could get off the ferry.

Ran out of gas on the gsxr 750 on the motorway. Had to push it 3km on a slight downhill gradient and after getting sick of walking it I stood my right foot on the left peg and scooted myself along with the other leg. Actually worked pretty well till my foot clicked it into first and locked up the back wheel and lowsided at about 20kmh infront of all the motorists.

[martybabe]

I just remembered another one. My mate restored a bantam,way back. Well he called it restored ,I called it, the bike with unnecessary engine parts, cause he had a margarine tub fulla important looking bits left over.

Anyhoo, Credit to the bantam,it still ran, some of the time.One time it didn't I was following him home for a cuppa. Slightly embarrassed, he decided to bump start the bugger. He got up a full head of steam and jumped on the gear lever . British bike init, he'd actually jumped on the brake pedal, the bike stopped dead but he hit the handle bars.

Holding the bike upright with his left hand he's hopping up and downgoing, ow! fugging ow! I'm pissin me self by now thinking it aint that bad ya pussy and then I saw the smoke exiting from his neck hole and sleeves.

He'd hit the handle bars right in the trouser pocket region where there lurked a full packet of swan vestas matches, these had ignited on mass and under his water proofs the poor bastard was well on fire. He was actually badly burned on his thigh and for that I feel bad but it remains to this day, the funniest bloody thing I have ever seen.

Sorry Dave sfuggin funny though! This is dumb! http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/sh...ad.php?t=67886

[breakaway]

[rainman]

Added to my list of stoopid things today. We (group of cruisers) popped in to BP Papakura on the way down to the Westpac and I realised it had come over all bright for a moment, so grabbed my sunnies out of my jacket pocket while I was waiting for a truck to move off in front of me. Didn't have a chance to put them on, so held them in my left hand while I scooted over to park the bike. Dunno if it was because I didn't have the handlebars held tight or what, but I proceeded to drop the bike at low speed, right in front of everyone sitting around watching the assembling bikers.

Big ups to the guy who helped me pick it up thought - dude, I owe you a beer.

[Monsterbishi]

Left my bike parked outside during a 3 day deluge of rain, ground got so soft the stand speared into it leaving the bike on its side...

Let someone try a wheelie on one of my bikes once, he over revved it, put it past 12 o'clock and smashed the rear stop light.

[Banesto John]

A bike cop in Christchurch recently admitted this to me.

On a recent evening when there was an event in Hagley Park he was parked up on Harper Ave having a sausage in bread donated by the local Lions club. Maybe donuts were off the menu. His Schuberth C2 helmet face was up, with the helmet on and secured.

A boy racer went past and gave him some shit, probably about the sausage. He immediately went into attack mode, and started the bike to make after the misguided youth. This was complicated by trying to finish a half eaten sausage with sauce and onions, while accelerating and gear changing. What happened to the sausage? He stuffed it in his mouth.

The helmet is now in for repair, having tomato sauce cleared from the boom microphone.............