'Teaching' the learner

[BiK3RChiK]

I don't know how it is for other learners, but for me, I have to be in the right frame of mind to be 'taught'. Impromptu lessons don't generally work for me. Tips I can take, but don't give me a 'lesson'...

Yesterday, I was invited on a ride with some other ladies. Story I was told was that there was another learner rider who wanted to get in some riding with other ladies at a reasonable pace (not too fast), so it would be a good ride for me to come along on. Oh, good, I say, because I'm not really onto it today, but that sounds nice....

Now, yesterday I wasn't in a riding mood really. The day before I had banged my head and after a good nights sleep I still had a slight headache. Also, I was supposed to be working, but a breakdown on my work vehicle put paid to that. So, after having spent most of the morning getting grease all over myself, the phone rings and I get invited on this ride. Hubby says to go for it... so I do.

Once all 5 of us meet up and we get out riding, at our first break, I find I'm getting 'instruction' from one particular rider. Okay, I can take some tips and she looks like a very experienced rider. BUT, at almost every stop thereafter, she rabbits on at me like I know nothing, and in a manner that what she has to say I would never have heard before, and yadda, yadda, yadda...... on it bloody goes! I tuned out..... The lady who invited me, even said to me on the way home, I should try to extend myself on back country roads like we were riding on! NO, I DON'T WANT TO TODAY!!!!

I just wanted to go out for a little ride, not to be given 'the learn', but to enjoy myself! Now, I feel like I don't want to ride with them again because I didn't have a fun ride at all, yet I know I could learn from them.

Do any other learners ever find themselves in a similar situation? How do you handle it?

[Vagabond]

Just tell them when you want help you'll ask for it!
or
I like to learn the hard way!

They should get the message real quick. Haha

[Maki]

If the advice is unwanted, then just try to ignore it as politely as possible and maybe try changing the subject. Like, "oh what a gorgeous view", or "where should we stop for a snack", or "I like the color of her bike", or what is the highest gear you can do roll on wheelies on your bike"?. If she persists you could ask her to teach you some stoppies and demonstrate clutch wheelies or something. I think she will get the message.

[homer]

yeah totally , try a come back that shows more advanced info that shes giving you .
like mentioned , emergency breaking , body position , break wear , just to take the pushy points off you

[Jantar]

Good post, BiK3RChiK. This is one of the reasons why the Mentor program is getting a complete overhaul. People learn at their own pace, and unless they are learning from a trained instructor they should never be given, nor accept, "lessons".

The best way to learn is to enjoy your riding; ask questions about techniques when you are ready for them, accept the odd "tip" about improving your riding, and basically enjoy your experience.

A trained instructor in any field, knows how to evaluate what you are doing right, as well as what you are doing wrong. And when giving lessons will concentrate on a single skill on any one day. Being told too much information in a single lesson leads to student overload, and if the student is already feeling a bit low, will just turn them off completely.

[Oakie]

It was just differing expectations. Your 'trainer' expected that her role was as an instructor. You expected just to be going for a low key ride. On that occasion you didn't know what to expect. Now you do so in similar circumstances at another ride just communicate your expectations before the ride begins.

Mrs Oakie had the same thing happen to her. Pissed her off a lot so I know where you're coming from.

[Mom]

On another note, learner rider or otherwise, no one should be pressured to change the way they are riding on a given day. Confidence is built slowly, sometimes you feel no progress is being made then all of a sudden something clicks.

I have experienced people pushing me to do something I am not comfortable doing, probably caused them no end of frustration when I simply ignored their advice and gesturing and continued to ride the way I wanted to.

[serious4]

Unwanted advise can be a hard pill to swallow sometimes. It sounds like they're just trying to help but I think the main advise giver could do with pulling her head in.
I'd definitely give them another chance but. If it happens again just politely tell the b---t to shut the f--k up.

[martybabe]

Hahha, babe it sounds like it was o poo day.Cant relate to getting the learn from bikers but my mate took me skiing and tried to teach me stuff all the time so much so it was like constant criticism not teaching at all.

In the end I did what was mentioned earlier, made it quite clear in an over the top paddy,that whilst I appreciate what he was trying to do,his constant overwhelming criticism/teaching wasn't working for me,so could we turn it round so that if I wanted help or advice I would ask for it, or he could have a clip round the earhole, his choice. We did just that and it worked well, i gave him ample opportunity to feel good about himself for educating such a ski dick and in the mean time practiced well without constant harassment.

Because your good at something does not make you a good teacher and because your not as proficient at something it's not an invitation to a 24 hour lecture by a know it all.

Enjoy your riding M,there are loads of other groups that may suit better. I'm sure they meant well but damn it comes over as so superior and condicending sometimes doesn't it.

[Disco Dan]

There's "Fixers/teachers" and "listeners".

[fireliv]

I agree, you have to be in the right frame of mind to have a lesson, otherwise you just wont take it in anyway. Also it depends on who the lesson is coming from ie, is the advice they are giving you accurate? What sort of rider are they? What kind of learning style suits you as such?? For example when I was working on my lines, heaps of people were giving me verbal tips, which I understood but didnt "get". It took the way that 1 guy said it, and then me following him round at a speed that he knew I could ride at to actually get it! Now I have riders commenting on my lines being really good (but I'm still slow!)

If I'm getting a lesson that I dont want, I just smile politely and leave it at that. I know whose advice I trust and stick with that!

[martybabe]

For example when I was working on my lines, heaps of people were giving me verbal tips, which I understood but didnt "get".

Hell yes. Well said.
My retort to my skiing instructor ." I know what your words mean,I studied English and thank you for speaking slower so that I can understand you better, you sanctimonious,condecending Poo pile, I am not 'getting' it".

[CookMySock]

You gotta speak up, miss. "Thanks, but no thanks."

DB

[yungatart]

I've never had the problem, so I don't really know how I would react, but something along the lines of DB's or Mom's suggestions probably.

Not every ride has to be a "lesson" and sometimes you can just try too hard.
Close your ears and ride your own ride!

[The Pastor]

that time of the month eh?