Lame excuses for getting off tickets

[skidMark]

Highway Patrol sitting on the side of the road with radar gun at the ready
...
Slow day...not many punters
...
Up in the distance appears a fast moving "boy racer car"
....
Woosh...past the highway guy at 150km per hour
...
Highway guy throws gun down and gives chase
....
Pulls said boy racer over..
...
Walks up to window, ticket book in hand...
...
Boy racer winds down window..
...

Highway officer.." I've been waiting for you all day"

Boy Racer.."Well I got here as fast as I could.."

Highway officer....."On ya way son" ( No ticket )

Laughing to hard need water.

How fucking legendary LOL

[Forest]

The 'best' lame excuse I've ever heard was in the Herald a few years ago...

Officer: Is there any particular reason why you were traveling so fast?

Driver: The low-fuel indicator light has just come on and I want to get home before all of my fuel runs out.

[vifferman]

I've never been warned... I just get tickets... Dammit!

Yeah... that's me too.
I've been pulled up while riding a bike a total of 6 times in the last 34 years or so, and got a ticket every time. I did get a reduced fine for my very first ticket ever (41 mph in a 30mph zone) by writing in to the court - $10 fine and had to do a Defensive Driving course. ($10 sounds like ferkall, but when you allow for inflation, it actually works out as a couple of hundred shekeldollars).
I also got a free Road Code once - that's when I argued with a bike cop in Cambridge about whether I needed a mirror on my MT250 or not. Apparently, the law had just changed, the cop just wrote me a ticket, gave me the Road Code and said, "Here - look it up yourself".

[vifferman]

With me it's about 4 warnings for every 5 or 6 tickets I write out.

Yeah, but you're a Top Bloke, Mr Scumdog, Sir. Can't necessariuly say the same for some of the cops around here.

Deserving people get tickets...are you one?

Yes. I've deserved EVERY ticket I've had. But I would've liked to have been let off the one I got where I was following a diesel fume-belching 4WD for about 15 minutes, and when I finally got to a passing lane and got by him, I was so pissed off that I gave it too much throttle. However, I was so flabbergasted when I got pulled over and ticketed, that when the cop asked me why I was speeding, I couldn't think of anything to say.
But... it was actually a treasured memory, because I had the vifferbabe on the back, and she said nothing, just gave me a big hug.

[marty]

Many years ago my uncle told me this one, he reckoned it happened one night in Germany when he was on shift...

All vehicles had to stop for the drivers to be breathalised at a checkpoint, boozebus and all.....
The line of slow moving cars came to an unexpected halt a hundred or so meters away from the actual checkpoint....
Some officers went over to investigate the reason for this interuption, and saw 2 elderly gentleman, very obviously intoxicated, sitting in the back of a mercedes.

"Does this vehicle belong to you ?"
"Yes" replies one of the fellows....."Is Mine"..
"who was driving?"...
"no idea, " says the old fellow, giggling away....

(More and more cars are still lining up behind this vehicle...)

"What do you mean, no idea....?"
"Well" goes the guy, "we were in the pub having a few drinks, and are well over the limit. So we want to leave the car at the pub, and call a taxi......
This nice young fellow in the pub hears of this and offers to drive us home in our own car....
Said he lived nearby, said he had a licence and looked sober........
So we get in the car, he drives us till here, untill we stop for your checkpoint......at which point he got out of the car for a piss.........."

No officer, never seen the guy before, don't know his name...

Police officer drove car out of the que (quite long by now)
Old fellows pissing their pants laughing in the back....

No fine......

this very thing happens quite regularly at checkpoints in NZ.

it's why there is usually an unmarked car parked 100m up from the checkpoint - to catch turners, people parking and running, and people getting into the back seat.

[marty]

was travelling between hamilton and paeroa in the car complete with family on the back roads doing a mild 120 or so. Cop appears coming the other way.....lights go on and sirens and he does a screeching u turn behind. Doesn't quite make it round in one go (i'm watching in mirrors as i slow down) and needs to back up a bit .....but he had overdone it and the front of his car was just off the road and bumper was getting pinged on electric fence.

i stopped and reversed back to him..he is out by now and looking pretty pissed...

long story shorter.........it ended with my wife driving the cop car and me and him and another passer by pushing to eventually get it out.....it had nothing to hook a tow rope onto either. He was suitably embarrassed but rather than thanking us he mumbled something about "can't really give you a ticket for speeding after you helped me out of there....mumble blah goodbye"

it made our afternoon.

been there done that - on Swamp Rd near Paeroa funnily enough........

and another time on SH1 south of Cambridge - powered out of a u-turn in the commie, got the back onto the grass in a big power slide, right round she went.........

[moT]

if the cop is definatly gonna give you a ticket try hipnotising him

[Ryan432]

I find that if you are a young male you ALWAYS get the ticket no matter that the 50 something guy driving a BMW in the lane next to you must have been doing at least 20kph more than you. You must clearly be a "boy racer" (in you mums 1.3L Corolla) and are therefore the bigger danger to society

[scumdog]

I find that if you are a young male you ALWAYS get the ticket no matter that the 50 something guy driving a BMW in the lane next to you must have been doing at least 20kph more than you. You must clearly be a "boy racer" (in you mums 1.3L Corolla) and are therefore the bigger danger to society

So how old are YOU?
(And how many tickets have you had?)


BTW: I COULD give you a list of 16 to 24 year olds who have NOT got tickets they could have.
And 50+ that HAVE got tickets.

Generalisations can be misleading...

[pritch]

Hey SD,

Got any "better work stories?"

[barty5]

Not relly an excuss but got off any way. Few years back brother take my courier van to move house gets pulled up for speeding and failing to slow down enough comin off the off ramp. Cop comes up to van asks to name see name on van door (mine of course) says nothing more turns before he could reply gose back and runs van and my name comes up clean no tickets in past five years. Comes bak and say just mind yah speed next time on yah way. Took brother half a day to work out he had run my name. Laughed or head off if he had got brothers details would have done him for every thing he could have givin his speeding ticket record.

[Ryan432]

So how old are YOU?



BTW: I COULD give you a list of 16 to 24 year olds who have NOT got tickets they could have.
And 50+ that HAVE got tickets.

Generalisations can be misleading...

Im 19 and I've had three speeding tickets, all in my car and all less than ten k over the limit, I wish I would have been pulled over by coppers more like you
BDW I think that 3 tickets (ok 5 including stationary cameras :wink: ) in four years is a pretty good record for someone my age! AND ive never had one on the motorbike!! (touch wood) Im proud to be a mature and responsable young rider. Peace