Had a near-miss today, and I really enjoyed it!

[avgas]

Skidmark, is that your Skiddy?

[kiwifruit]

12 inch wrench

How would you like that weapon turned on you?

[NUTBAR]

A blind git in a 4x4 pulled out in front of me this morning, I braked hard, evaded, no big worries.
Then I pulled up beside him at the lights and SLAMMED my fist several times on the side of the canopy, it made the hugest noise, and the bloke just about jumped out of his skin.
"Did you even look before you pulled out?!" I demanded.
"I looked twice." he said in defence.
"Then you must be fucking blind!!" I told him.
"Fuck you, and if you hit my car one more time I'll hit you" he said.
"Cock!" said I, and BOOM BOOM, two more mega hits on his door. No damage, just a big noise.
By this time the lights had turned green, people behind us waiting.
I could see him boiling furious, he undid his seatbelt and made as if to open the door and get out.
He said "You fucking homo, you want a bash?!"
I laughed a little insane giggle that bubbled up from somewhere deep inside: "Bring it on, motherfucker." I said gleefully, and put my sidestand down.
He saw I was ready to get it on, that I was giggling and possibly a little crazed, and he decided to stay inside the 4x4. He swore a few more times and took off.

For the rest of the morning I've felt great, energised, peppy, very very good.
I'm still hyper, I think I'll have a beer for lunch to calm down.

Confrontation is fun.
I think this confirms I'm a bastard.

come to tauranga, & you can do it every day!

[Steam]

How would you like that weapon turned on you?

That would be very very bad. I'd never use a weapon, I was in a couple of fights a few years ago as a security guard, but nobody got hurt.

I'm all talk.

[kiwifruit]

That would be very very bad. I'd never use a weapon, I was in a couple of fights a few years ago as a security guard, but nobody got hurt.

I'm all talk.

I'm glad to hear it

[CookMySock]

Ride like they are AIMING for you and you'll generally avoid a lot of problems.

Hah! I ride like I am aiming at THEM!! And I leave my headlights on full during the day - bugger them. I find cagers take any weakness as permission to run me over, so I fluff my feathers right up and drive right at them. MOVE !!

If they stay in their lane we'll all get along just fine.

DB

[Mikkel]

That would be very very bad. I'd never use a weapon, I was in a couple of fights a few years ago as a security guard, but nobody got hurt.

I'm all talk.

Nah, if you're a good fighter you can walk out of a fight as the winner without ever having to hurt anyone. (not counting egos of course)

Tearing people to bits and beating them to a pulp is easy - it's taking them down without damage to yourself or them that is tricky.

Aikido is good for that stuff

(And don't start a fucking Martial Arts discussion now, I am aware that there are more effective ways to win a fight than aikido, it's not the point.)

[Forest]

DIAL 555.......

Sadly this achieves nothing.

[alanzs]

Hah! I ride like I am aiming at THEM!! And I leave my headlights on full during the day - bugger them. I find cagers take any weakness as permission to run me over, so I fluff my feathers right up and drive right at them. MOVE !!

If they stay in their lane we'll all get along just fine.

DB

I couldn't agree more. I was born and raised on the freeways of Lost Angeles, where people carry guns and riding was a matter of survival of the fastest and the fittest. I rode at least 30k miles a year for many years.

I've no patience for cages that fucking can't seem to make up their minds. I take every advantage of riding a bike and I ride, shall we say, aggressively. If you don't, you might as well drive a cage. Get out of my way nana!

I split lanes, always. I squeeze in tight places all the time, frankly, sometime just to see if I can fit. That's what make riding in traffic worthwhile.

I have a 13 bulb red flashing LED light on my rear fender that is blinding to cages in my rear. I can see them put their hands up to shield their eyes. Good, then they see me and stay away.

I time my approach to oncoming cars so I make other cars behinds me have to slow down, then I zip away.

I have a BLINDING 6000k HID light on all the time. I see cars put their mirrors down as I approach; good they see me coming, and like you said, if they stay in their lane, we'll get along just fine.

I have a fliam horn which is very loud. I use it regularly to get people to move out of my way.

I wear a Hiz viz suit all the time, so I'll never be crumpled on the ground again as some latte sipping, phone texting, ponsonby bitch in her monster suv says "I didn't see you." You'll see ME!

My middle finger flys up at the slightest provocation... And, I live to ride another day.

I love riding...

[Boob Johnson]

Aikido is good for that stuff

Very true, did it for a few years myself

I don't ever go out looking for trouble but at the same time as mentioned earlier I will always let them know they have come close to killing me & if that stirs them enough to want to fight me then fight we shall, I wont be throwing the first punch, but I will be throwing the last


What blows me away is how sheepish people are when someone so flippantly puts their life on the line, just doesn't compute how one could shrug it off as no big thing. Maybe if they had 9 pins & a titanium plate screwed to their hip for life like myself then they might have a slight different view.

[Katman]

Maybe if they had 9 pins & a titanium plate screwed to their hip for life like myself then they might have a slight different view.

You forgot to mention the lead plate inside your skull.

[CookMySock]

I was born and raised on the freeways of Lost Angeles [awesome story trimmed]

BAHAHAH, you are a wholesale, certifiable, BASTARD, LOL. Bring it on. Well done.

DB

[Swoop]

Sadly this achieves nothing.

Actually, it does.
Somewhere a public servant is employed by this crap. Filing it away somwhere, so that a statistician can come up with some fantastic new "research" that proves nothing.

I squeeze in tight places all the time, frankly, sometime just to see if I can fit. That's what make riding in traffic worthwhile.

It's only tight when both mirrors are being folded back!

[alanzs]

BAHAHAH, you are a wholesale, certifiable, BASTARD, LOL. Bring it on. Well done.

DB

Just trying to share the love...

[alanzs]

Actually, it does.
Somewhere a public servant is employed by this crap. Filing it away somwhere, so that a statistician can come up with some fantastic new "research" that proves nothing.

It's only tight when both mirrors are being folded back!

What are mirrors on bikes for anyways? I know how I look and it ain't pretty...