Gunnyrob's Beemer breaks again!!

[gunnyrob]

Well my faith in the legendary reliability of BMWs took a massive hit yesterday!!!

In the pre-dawn murk of Friday, 9 May, I listened to the weather report & decided to have a crack at attending the Cold Duck ralley at Waipawa.

Cos I'm a double hard wanna be adventure rider, I decided to take Mighty Max (My trusty Bavarian steely steed) through the Western Access in central Waikato, then West side of Lake Taupo, then round the mountains to Waiouru via National Park. Then it was the crowning glory, the Gentle Annie, otherwise known as the Taihape-Napier Road.

Off I went and up until Te Awamutu, the weather was shite. Buckets of rain even managed to penetrate the near impregnable outer layer of my flash riding jacket & soaked my cellphone (As I would find out later)

Turning left at Kihikihi, the weather abated, the roads dried and all was cool. "This road would be a fantastic ride for the mob going to Turangi for Queens Birthday" I thought to myself as I swept past the dams toward Mangakino. (lots of straights, as in maximum velocity straights, sweepers and no cops.)

On a straight bit of road I passed an Air force van, recognised the driver, and gave him a cheery toot and wave before blasting off into the distance.

Weather round the mountain looked like crap, so I headed down the desert road. I even passed a cop who was trickling along at 95kmh, passing him at a steady 100 in 5th gear. I stopped at the first eatery on the left in Waiouru (next to Subway) warmed up by the fire and had an excellent all day breakfast & coffee. Then I gassed up & set off for the Annie.

What a great road. The first 60 km is excellent (though narrow) well paved seal. Spectacular scenery especially around the Rangitikei River. I hit the gravel at a good pace, there's 60 km of that, and from what I saw it was hard pack dirt topped with pea gravel. On the GS, that means 80kmh on the straight bits, but 10kms into it, it all turned to custard

[gunnyrob]

I was tackling a steep down hill when, over the gentle melody in my headset (Chemical Brothers) a high pitch metallic screech from Max's nether regions jarred me from my state of Motorcycling Nirvana.

A blip of the throttle did nothing else but increase the volume of the noise, so with an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach, I coasted to a halt near a work crew crushing gravel.

I shut him down, then started up again. Hmmm, engines going, so I pulled in the clutch.

"Screech"

I engaged first gear & let out the clutch

SCREEECH (and no forward movement)

"Well," I said. "I'm fucked"

And I was. I pulled out my cellphone. Through misty plastic it said "There's no network out here you dumb ass" And so I had to have a think about what to do next.

One of the work crew came over & asked what I was up to.

I told him.

"You're fucked" he said, and went back to work.

[gunnyrob]

Having been bailed out of a not quite so bad situation by the AA last year (go search for "BMW Broke Down), I again needed their help. I scratched a desperate note with all my details and flagged down a passing car. (the first for half an hour)

Luckily it was an Army Bloke going off to a sheep station further up the line. You can always trust fellow military folks, and after explaining my plight, I asked him to call the AA. "Make sure you tell them the bike is really busted and I need a recovery vehicle". He nodded, gave me a thumbs up, a smile, tooted and zoomed off.

2 hours later, I was pretty up to speed on how the gravel crew worked with the loaders, diggers & crushers. Next time I'll make sure I take a book.

Then the AA recovery truck from Taihape came around the corner! "You're a long way out" said the AA Dude, "what's wrong?"

I showed him.

"You're fucked!" he said, and we pushed Max on board his second AA tow truck within a year.

Back at Taihape Suzuki, we asked if they could help. "Through clenched teeth, sucking badly, they said, "Nah Mate, you're fucked. nearest BMW workshop is Hamilton."

"Hamilton?" I said, disbelievingly; "Man I'm fucked!"

The AA dude (who used to help organised the cold kiwi rally when it was the REAL cold Kiwi at 6 cross Army camp) "Oh well, lets get it back to my garage, and we'll come up with a plan"

So we did.......

[gunnyrob]

Friday. 5pm. Who owes me a REALLY big favour?

My Brother, Warren does!! (Known as KRAYY on the site)

Ring Ring!

KRAYY:"Hello, Warren speaking"

GUNNYROB: "Hey Warren, I'm in Taihape and my bike's fucked. Can you get a trailer & come and pick me up?"

K: "TAIHAPE? What are you doing in Taihape????)

Long story ensued.

K: "Right, I need to do some phone calls. Ring me back in half an hour."

K: (30 Mins later) "I'll pick you up TONIGHT in FROSTY's Van, make sure we can get access to the bike at night, YOU'RE DRIVING HOME"

GR: "I'd better get a Motel then!"

[MIXONE]

Similar noise and result from my K75 some time back.It was the brake pads worn out and an easy fix.However I was only a couple of kays from home which makes life easier.Good write up though.

[yungatart]

What a great road. The first 60 km is excellent (though narrow) well paved seal. Spectacular scenery especially around the Rangitikei River. I hit the gravel at a good pace, there's 60 km of that, and from what I saw it was hard pack dirt topped with pea gravel. On the GS, that means 80kmh on the straight bits, but 10kms into it, it all turned to custard

It is pretty isolated country up there...you were lucky a car come along at all!
The gravel is only about 35 km long with a couple of km sealed in the middle, which is the actual Annie.

[gunnyrob]

I grabbed the Givi bag with my shower supplies and non riding clothes & found a cheap (affordable & adequate) room at the Taihape Motel. Opening the top box, I discovered the lid of my jar of instant coffee power had fallen off, so now all my clothes were coffee flavoured! :slap: Shower & Bed.

Eventually, the gravel crunching sound of a van hauling up outside the unit after a restless couple of hours meant help had arrived!

"You cock" jibed Warren, " Cora's (His wife) not very happy with you!!"

We tried to look as innocent as two people could while manhandling a BMW into a van just off the main drag of Taihape at 2am on a saturday morning.

K: "Right, lets go, you're driving"

GR: "Sweet, we're gone"

Thus ensued 6 hours of man talk, bike talk, napping (passenger only) and coffee (Driver only)

The bike only fell over in the van once
K: "Ooops, maybe we SHOULD have gone up SH 1 instead of the twisty road!)

But other than a popped mirror all was good.

We dropped Max off at experience.

"Dear Dear" observed Sebastian, the mechanic. "That sounds like the clutch. If you're lucky, that will be the only thing wrong. If the gearbox input shaft is damaged, it will be VERY expensive."

"Dear Dear" Observed Gunnyrob. "How long till he's fixed?"

S: "At least a month, I'll call you with an estimate in a couple of weeks."

" Dear dear" I thought, "That's me pretty well fucked!"

[gunnyrob]

So, that's it until I get the damage report. As I type this, I've had about 2 hours sleep since 0500 yesterday, have ridden/driven 900+km & have been pretty stressed.

Don't know when Max will be back from the BMW hospital, but am waiting for his return with bated breath.

Such a day of contrasts, I was REALLY SO GETTING into the groove, all was clicking totally, then it just stopped. It could have been a lot worse, so I'm grateful it turned out the way it did.

So many thanks of mine go to the AA rep in Taihape (I'd still be there otherwise!;

FROSTY for making his van available for stranded KBers

and KRAYY for being such an outstanding brother to go 950km out of his way to rescue a broken down BMW

(Thanks too to his lovely wife Cora, who had to do without him for a night )

So, no more rides for a month & a bit. Missed the Cold Duck, but hopefully the trip to the Cold Kiwi won't be as eventful!

[FROSTY:Me]

Ya forgot to mention the bit about Frostys van not having a heater

[Disco Dan]

Ya forgot to mention the bit about Frostys van not having a heater

I think your van needs a new number plate... turning into the local bike ay ..everyones taking her out for a ride... "vanslut" or "bikewhore"

[gunnyrob]

Ya forgot to mention the bit about Frostys van not having a heater

Or A Radio! Thanks mate. It was choice of you to do that for us.

[Crasherfromwayback]

BMW's reputation for reliability comes from their simple old boxers of yester year, when compared to the other shit around at the time.

They are over priced piles of poo that have more serious mechanical 'issues' than ANY other brand of bike I know of.

And yes...I've worked in BMW Dealerships.

[Big Dave]

Bummer - Nicely writted though.

[chubby]

oooooh bugger me.

Fantastic read yet bummer. Feel sorry for you and trust the medical fees are not too high. Good luck.

Give that man a beer and too all concerned.

[Krayy]

Taihape, I mean FFS. Why couldn't it have shit itself in Hamilton. At least I would have had some sleep.

And now comes the brighter side...in joke form:

Cross-services joke
So the Navy and the Air Force decide to have a motorbike race from West Auckland to Mt Wellington (about 30km) to prove who has the best rider. The Navy puke shows up on a Nifty 50 and when his mates ask him why the heck he didn't come on a faster bike he replied "That's cool, cos the Air Force are sending Gunnyrob on his Beemer".

Haiku
Beemer broke again...
Reliability, ha!
Buy a Honda bro

Limerick
There was a young (and I use that term advisedly) born again biker
Whose tours took him hither and thither
His Beemer it broke
In a huge cloud of smoke
And his brother drove all night to f**kin' Taihape to save his ass!!!!

Lay into him folks!!!