Invisible cloaking devices and anal sex.

**madbikeboy** · 10th October 2008, 07:38

I've been on this kick of riding sensibly, not speeding, not riding normally - that is to say, in a manner kinda sorta consistent with the road code.

It's just not working.

This morning, I had nine, count 'em, 9! cagers pull out on me, cut me off, or just about rear end me when another cage cuts me off.

I feel like my halo of invincibility has been swapped for an invisible cloaking device.

So, kind of like admitting a bad relationship is over, this is not working for me.

I've given it a good nudge, in the last month I've had more close calls than in the last 5 years.

Now, I'm not suggesting that I'm going to ride like Carver, pulling wheelstands in traffic and being a moron - plus I could never be a Moron Few as I don't ever want to experience anal sex with other "men" - but I am going to become my normal self, cheeky, a little obnoxious, and more aggressive. Aggressive, meaning taking an assertive approach to traffic management, not beating people with clenched fists.

Keith Code writes about having presence, and sitting quietly in traffic and filtering quietly lacks that ability to project presence. So instead, it's back to more noise and rev's, and pushiness.

**007XX** · 10th October 2008, 07:51

Originally Posted by madbikeboy

Keith Code writes about having presence, and sitting quietly in traffic and filtering quietly lacks that ability to project presence. So instead, it's back to more noise and rev's, and pushiness.

Interesting! I think you're onto something here...However, I think that you may find it might be about balance, perhaps.

What my point is: being too pushy will bring you strife with the law...and as you found out, being too mousy will get you stepped on by cagers!

There is definitely a middle between the two where you can be assertive enough to stay out of trouble with both sides (cagers and boys in blue)...

Go forth and find your inner Zen...the Dalai Lama would be proud!

**buellbabe** · 10th October 2008, 07:54

damned if ya do...damned if ya don't...

**madbikeboy** · 10th October 2008, 07:57

007XX - ARE YOU PREGNANT!?!??! How incredibly exciting!!!!! Congratulations, you must be totally stoked (can you tell I'm clucky?).

Yes, it's a really fine balance, sensibility and reason balanced against the dim view of the law. I'd rather be alive with regular payments to the Helen Nazi Party coffers than roadkill under a bus.

**007XX** · 10th October 2008, 08:08

Originally Posted by madbikeboy

007XX - ARE YOU PREGNANT!?!??! How incredibly exciting!!!!! Congratulations, you must be totally stoked (can you tell I'm clucky?).

Yes, indeed I am

and ecstatic about it too! Still early days yet, but hopefully everything will go smoothly and my current little grain of rice will turn into pineapple size in no time...

Yes, it's a really fine balance, sensibility and reason balanced against the dim view of the law. I'd rather be alive with regular payments to the Helen Nazi Party coffers than roadkill under a bus.

We'd rather you'd be alive too dear

...it'd be a crying shame seeing such good brains splattered on the asphalt.

**Fatjim** · 10th October 2008, 08:16

"There's nothing new under the sun" comes to mind here.

Old wisdom, learned again almost the hard way.

Good to see you learned it early, not too late.

**vgcspares** · 10th October 2008, 08:20

Go-karting at Rainbow's End gives a clue to what's needed to drive a cage - no sense of balance and no concern for anything outside the forward field of view - on our roads with 50kph speed limits there's nothing exciting going on to occupy the senses so getting a cager's attention often requires flashing lights, prominent signage, or two tones, loud exhaust and in your face positioning. Take your pick or ride where there aren't any

**vifferman** · 10th October 2008, 08:21

I think if you're intending to be sensible, or at least stay alive, then you need to be aggressively defensive, if you know what I mean.
Assert your position on the road, and remember that Joe Average is at worst trying to kill you, and at best, perhaps so brain-dead as to not care/give a crap about who he/she is sharing the road with.

But you knew all that.

**madbikeboy** · 10th October 2008, 08:42

Originally Posted by vifferman

I think if you're intending to be sensible, or at least stay alive, then you need to be aggressively defensive, if you know what I mean.
Assert your position on the road, and remember that Joe Average is at worst trying to kill you, and at best, perhaps so brain-dead as to not care/give a crap about who he/she is sharing the road with.

But you knew all that.

Yeah, basic tenat for the last 20 odd years, but there's a level beyond that as well in terms of spatial reasoning, time and distance, and presence. I was trying to do the right thing, and it proves that no good deed ever goes unpunished...

Cheers mate, and apologies for plagarising the VifferBabe thing.

**vifferman** · 10th October 2008, 08:45

Originally Posted by madbikeboy

Cheers mate, and apologies for plagarising the VifferBabe thing.

Plagiarising.
vifferbabe.
No worries (ignore me - I'm just grumpy and suffering from BikeWithdrawalSymptoms).

**madbikeboy** · 10th October 2008, 08:53

Originally Posted by 007XX

Yes, indeed I am

and ecstatic about it too! Still early days yet, but hopefully everything will go smoothly and my current little grain of rice will turn into pineapple size in no time...

We'd rather you'd be alive too dear

...it'd be a crying shame seeing such good brains splattered on the asphalt.

I'm so very happy for you both, and everything will go smoothly, your kharma is good!

And as for the brains bit, my evil ex would pay to see exactly that happen - LOL!

**madbikeboy** · 10th October 2008, 10:04

Originally Posted by vifferman

Plagiarising.
vifferbabe.
No worries (ignore me - I'm just grumpy and suffering from BikeWithdrawalSymptoms).

Why are you off the bike??

**vifferman** · 10th October 2008, 10:06

Originally Posted by madbikeboy

Why are you off the bike??

See my "Woohoo! etc." thread.
Blardy #2 Son.
Blardy mumblegrumble...wee taste of riding... back to farkn car.... grumblemumblefark... blardy need a fix....