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Thread: I'm gonna learn me some COBOL!

  1. 25th October 2008, 14:47 #1
    xwhatsit
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    I'm gonna learn me some COBOL!

    It's where the future's at!


    .NET is sooooo yesterday
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  2. 25th October 2008, 14:58 #2
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    Quote Originally Posted by xwhatsit View Post
    .NET is sooooo yesterday
    .NET is so bloody uni... typical, got my degree, they told me it was necessary

    now I write all my network management scripts and software add-ons in vbscript (or command prompt) and notepad.

    I will agree that at least .NET has better error handling and identification
    Quote Originally Posted by Jane Omorogbe from UK MSN on the KTM990SM
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  3. 25th October 2008, 15:02 #3
    xwhatsit
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gremlin View Post
    notepad.
    Dude -- have I got something that'll change your life -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vi

    They've even got clicky-buttony versions for Windows pussies.

    Yeah, they're feeding us all the Java and .NET/C# shit but clearly COBOL is where the future is going to be. I'm waiting for the OOP version, `ADD 1 TO COBOL GIVING COBOL'.
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  4. 25th October 2008, 15:08 #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by xwhatsit View Post
    Dude -- have I got something that'll change your life -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vi
    I like notepad... its simple... I tried to read the wiki entry, oh wait, its a long weekend, bugger trying to figure out why you need it over notepad (no, I don't need 20 lines of the same thing)

    yay for notepad (bet you won't catch uni saying that)
    Quote Originally Posted by Jane Omorogbe from UK MSN on the KTM990SM
    It's barking mad and if it doesn't turn you into a complete loon within half an hour of cocking a leg over the lofty 875mm seat height, I'll eat my Arai.
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  5. 25th October 2008, 15:11 #5
    xwhatsit
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    `Vi' is two characters. `Notepad' is seven. Hence the superiority.

    Just look at `C' (one char) versus `Visual Basic Super Pricey .NET 2010 Special Magical Uber Edition' (buffer overflow chars) for the proof of this fact.
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  6. 25th October 2008, 17:00 #6
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    Told y' so. And notepad has only ONE editing buffer. Meh, useless.
    Quote Originally Posted by skidmark
    This world has lost it's drive, everybody just wants to fit in the be the norm as it were.
    Quote Originally Posted by Phil Vincent
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  7. 25th October 2008, 18:01 #7
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    lol, why would you want to learn COBOL.

    Wait, would that look good on my CV.
    Code:
     BCMS, in progress. But i know COBOL! give me a summer job.
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  8. 25th October 2008, 18:07 #8
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    And I to my motorcycle parked like the soul of the junkyard. Restored, a bicycle fleshed with power, and tore off. Up Highway 106 continually drunk on the wind in my mouth. Wringing the handlebar for speed, wild to be wreckage forever.
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  9. 25th October 2008, 18:26 #9
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    COBOL and vi go together like cock and cunt.
    Quote Originally Posted by skidmark
    This world has lost it's drive, everybody just wants to fit in the be the norm as it were.
    Quote Originally Posted by Phil Vincent
    The manufacturers go to a lot of trouble to find out what the average rider prefers, because the maker who guesses closest to the average preference gets the largest sales. But the average rider is mainly interested in silly (as opposed to useful) “goodies” to try to kid the public that he is riding a racer
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  10. 25th October 2008, 18:38 #10
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  11. 25th October 2008, 19:18 #11
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    Languages I learnt (with years):

    Portran (1969)
    PL1 (1970)
    IBM Assembler (1970)
    Fortran (1971)
    Cobol (1972) Cobol already an OLD language

    Basic1, Basic2, BasicA, Advanced Basic, QuickBasic (at various stages in the 1980s)
    VBM (1988)
    VBa (1996)
    Time to ride
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  12. 25th October 2008, 20:04 #12
    xwhatsit
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ixion View Post
    COBOL and vi go together like cock and cunt.
    Let's not sully the good name of vi by associating it with COBOL, thanks!

    I'm waiting for Commodore 64 (6510) assembler to make a comeback. That'll be when I'll make a killing
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  13. 25th October 2008, 22:50 #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by xwhatsit View Post
    Yeah, they're feeding us all the Java and .NET/C# shit but clearly COBOL is where the future is going to be. I'm waiting for the OOP version, `ADD 1 TO COBOL GIVING COBOL'.
    Dude, Microfocus netexpress cobol .NET 5.0 is kind of cool. And it is fully object oriented (but still does not have local variables).
    "People are stupid ... almost anyone will believe almost anything. Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie because they want to believe it's true, or because they are afraid it might be true. People's heads are full of knowledge, facts, and beliefs, and most of it is false, yet they think it all true ... they can only rarely tell the difference between a lie and the truth, and yet they are confident they can, and so all are easier to fool." -- Wizard's First Rule
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  14. 26th October 2008, 02:27 #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by xwhatsit View Post
    Dude -- have I got something that'll change your life -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vi
    You've clearly never used Emacs.

    Oh well. Your loss.
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  15. 26th October 2008, 07:03 #15
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    Pah !! Bangalore is full of COBOL programmers and they'll work for fuck all. Mind you, the place is full of programmers of every language.
    "There must be a one-to-one correspondence between left and right parentheses, with each left parenthesis to the left of its corresponding right parenthesis."
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