Hope

[ManDownUnder]

BMW - I have nothing to say or add - but I'm reading with baited breath. Good luck to you, Ahu, docs, nurses - hell... the whole shootin' box!

Kia kaha!

[<G>]

We should all be so lucky to have as good a friend as you when times get tough. Best wishes to you both.

[Ixion]

A life is given back to you. Always a reason for that, past present or future. He who runs may read.

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

Yesterday was spent preparing him for his angiogram and angioplasty - the latter putting a stent in the blocked artery - We watched the video on it about 3 times - they told him he had to remember the procedure - he was that intent on it he was writing fast and asking me how to spell some big technical words - I told him all he had to remember was that he was to be absolutely still after it - for 4 - 8 hours. (a major for Ahu to keep still).

Anyway today was the day, we waited around until noon and he went in - we were told he could go home if it was all successful. - I left and got lunch for him and did some shoping. Got back and he wasn't quite thru - then he came out - they couldn't put the stent in - he was too restless - frankly I don't believe they sedated him enough. So that was very disappointing - however they did find a blockage which was the cause of his heart attack.

So he devoured his lunch. Had to wait for the Dr until 7pm. He said the consultants would have a meeting tomorrow and decided where to from here and when they would attempt it again.

Ahu asked if he could go home in the meantime (Holy shit I thought, here's World War 3). The fully explained to him that he was lucky to have survived and to come out of so unscathed however he could have another attack any time and he definitely would not survive a second one. He was getting agitated so I said to him "Hey I can't take that risk Ahu - if you died while I was looking after you - I couldn't handle that and I do not have the energy to do cpr on you".

They left and he was ok and accepted their explanation. Then he got it into his head he just wanted to go outside and breathe fresh air (he's really an outdoors man) so on went the shoes, t-shirt and went to the Nurse - he got a firm no and she advised him to ask the dr in the morning.

Well that nearly ended him - I was in the process of leaving - he just turned his back muttering away so I said to this back - Patience and tolerance - heard him mutter run out of that. Oh well it would have been nice for him to have said goodbye to me.

Today the guy that saved his life came to see him (he'd been overseas). I had bought a pounamu in the symbol of eternal friendship (on Ahu's behalf) all his workmates were there so we had a moving ceremony while Ahu blessed it and I put it on Hori.

Ahu's memory is getting better everyday. He had a flashback today - he told his friend that he had a vision of Shirley learning over him with her fist clenched - oops that was when I had just been told he wouldn't live and I was in shock and said to him dont you dare kark it, and his whole body moved even tho they had paralysed him.

I am going to work tomorrow for 3 hours - the break will do me good. I am totally exhausted but at peace.

[racefactory]

I tell you I had the waves of good goosebumps pulsing down me when I read the good news....

As long as there is life there is hope.

Thanks for the read, very down to earth. You must be in peace now- excellent, all the best for the rest of it.

[Duke girl]

Shirley you are truely an inspiration to Ahu and your support and understanding of what a loyal friend is to have is awesome. Im sure that this has definately helped Ahu get to where he is today as well as the great staff at the Hospital and the care they have been giving him. Just make sure that you takecare of yourself as well, and its so good to hear that Ahu has recovered they way he has even if he still has a very long road in front of him which I know that you will travel down with him with your amazing support for him. Wish him all the best from me and heres hoping that he will be back out in the real world where he wants to be.

[sels1]

Amazing story Shirl - all the best to you guys

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

Thanks for all the above. I do appreciate it. I was only at the hospital for 2.5 hours today. Ahu has accepted he has to stay another week and was in a positive frame of mind. How that came about was a Maori friend of his visited him. While Ahu can talk to me about anything (almost) it was in the back of my mind that he really needed to talk with someone of his own culture, his own language and to a male friend. I never said anything to him but I had spoken to a lovely Maori woman yesterday and shared that - she just looked at me and grinned and said I was very sensitive to his culture - how did I know that - well I have worked with Maori people alot and intuition. I wasn't sure whether I was right tho but she said I'd hit the nail on the head - and without any intervention on my part - that happened today. I could see Ahu was at peace - they also had a good laugh.

I keep forgetting his memory isn't so good - I had told him on several occasions his cousin (only member of the whanau) came to see him and we haven't seen sight or sound of him since. He came to have a gawk the day after it happened and to tell me he would be taking his body back home. I told him very firmly Ahu does not want that = he has made his wishes very clear to me about his funeral - cousin said it doesn't matter what he wants - that is whats going to happen. I told him that the whanau had not contacted Ahu when his mother and 2 brothers died. I was told the family dissed him because he drank - I said he had been off the booze for a period of 5 years, then 2 years later and up to now he is 7 years sober - I told him he did not have a very forgiving family. And anyway Ahu wasn't dead yet. Don't think cousy bro liked me very much. I related this all to Ahu again today he cracked up laughing and said he would loved to have seen his face and added like bloody hell that's gonna happen. To that end Ahu is going to make a will stating very clearly what he wants.

Because his memory is poor when he got to the ward on Saturday - I put a framed photo of me on his bedside cabinet so something was familar to him and brought a couple of things from his home. The photo is black and white and was a glamour one about 3 years ago - I wish he would put it away now tho. I take a good photo but I don't think I'm like that in real life - lol - hows that for a blonde comment. Anyway he gets alot of comments and he says - she is my angel. The other day he was a bit stressed so I gave him a face, neck and head massage - hoping he would fall asleep - his male nurse came in and said jesus you lucky bugger can I swap places. All the nurses have been amazing.

I have learn't alot about myself the last 2 weeks. My personal goal is to practice unconditional love, to give freely, willingly and cheerfully. To treat others how I want to be treated. In the past I have done that to the detriment of my health - this time I am also looking after myself better. I can ease back a bit now. I had a lovely evening tonite babysitting a 13 year old - she is wonderful company, we went to KFC then up town. I got to listen to some of her music - which I enjoyed. I will also catch up with friends on the weekend. There have been many rewards during this time. The wonderful people I have met at the hospital, renewed energy, people's kindness to me - both here on KB and Ahu's friends, plus the hospital staff. I have enjoyed a deep sense of peace and serenity and had Ahu not made it then I know I had done my best.

When he gets out of hospital he will stay with me - thank god I have a comfortable couch lol which I will be sleeping on. My cat wouldn't allow 2 people in my bed - cos she has her own pillow on HER side and no way will she move. However, having said that - she got the pip the other nite due to feeling neglected - she has been used to me being home all day and of course I have practically lived at the hospital - and SHE slept on the couch lol. She's happily snoring beside me on her pillow.
I better shut up and get some sleep

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

GREAT NEWS

Ahu is going home tomorrow. He had 3 stents put in today and it all went well. I think he is in total overwhelm and also on an emotional roller coaster.

He is to come and stay at my place for a week - he texts me tonite saying he will go home instead. I count to 10 and I rang him. He gives me some cock & bull story about not want to impose on me ya de ya. I actually let him finish and I let the silence last - and he got nervous - lol. He got the "Do you think I like hearing the sound of my own voice?? You know I mean what I say - ya de ya and then I thought - this isn't about me - and I realised he would be on an emotional roller coaster and I asked him if he was and he said yes.

We have to train him to slow down. God forbid the hard work starts now lol. I told him he could expect tough love from all his friends. Nobody would let up on him lol. To that end I am making a list of all his friends. Also a list of positive opportunities and a picture of him trussed up like a turkey in ICU that I took - cos I thought - if he lives - he won't believe me how he looked. It is not a nice picture but it is a damned good reminder for him.

I will probably be called every kind of bitch in the coming week but tough. Thank god I'm mature enough not to take it personally - I can be just as stubborn as he can.

It has been an amazing journey and while I'm in no way religious, I said prayers of gratitude for Ahu's life, the many wonderful people I met around the hospital, the hospital staff, and Ahu's many friends, who also showed such kindness towards me - also for the strength I have been given to be there for him and also it broke thru some barriers re my brain tumour - so many miracles. Also I thank you all for your kind words and support - it helped see me thru.

[shafty]

Good on Ya Girl - you're awesome!