noise control

[Lias]

Let me move into your place for a week and I'll teach him what REAL neighbours from hell are like. Some tips from my flatting days:

Firstly, stereo cranked up ultra loud, in short blasts every 30 minutes until you goto bed/as soon as you get up.. Like 1 song.. Long enough for him to get woken up but so that its unlikely that noise control will turn up and hear it. Experiment, found out what type of music he cant stand and play that. Anything with pounding drums is probably a good start.

Secondly, buy a high powered spotlight.. Randomly aim it through his curtains at strange times of the night.

If noise control come around, simply ignore them.. Just dont answer the door, or if you do answer the door try and look large and intimidating, carrying a machete or spiked club helps. We used to keep a huge whore of a machete by the door of our flat for just this purpose. Make noise control afraid to come onto your property without an armed offenders escourt, without ever actually doing something that can get you arrested.

Other things to do that are are pushing the legal boundaries (some may be illegal, IANAL after all), but are guaranteed to annoy the piss out of him.

Launching fireworks at his house (IE roman candles etc)
Scattering small pieces of broken glass over his lawn
Spraying his lawn/plants with weedkiller or diesel in the middle of the night. You can get creative with making diesel artwork on his lawn.
Deflate his car tyres without damaging them.
Make a compost heap, and randomly throw spadefuls of compost over his washing / house / car
Make sure you throw every single last ciggy butt smoked by anyone at your house over his fence.
Buy a vicious dog (preferrably a legal variation on the "banned" fighting dogs, some of the close relatives of Fila's for example are 100% legal in NZ whilst still being incrediably lethal fighting dogs). Teach the dog to growl at that neighbour, and teach him to shit on his lawn.

Thinks that are definitly illegal:
Slash his tyres
Superglue his car/house keyholes
Expanding foam up his exhaust pipe
Whip up a flyer that says the guy is a sex offender / pedophile, print off a few hundred and put them in every letterbox within a few blocks.
Take potshots at any pets he may have with a decent .22 air rifle.

You can get endlessly creative really if you want to be a true neighbour from hell.

[yungatart]

The offending drummer did want to Roundup his front lawn with "I love the drummer!" Thought that was a bit obvious. We had a few biker friends around to pull wheelies as they left. Funny thing is I got woken up by THEIR alarm clock at 6.20 one Saturday morning-I should have complained but..
My dear old mum taught me that revenge is a dish best eaten cold and my Dad says all things come to those who wait.
Now the young fella wants to learn Bagpipes i might get my revenge eh?
BTW - he doesn't practice for hours at a time, plays his electric guitar unamped and plays keyboard thru headphones. Normally does drum practice some time between 4pm and 6pm week days and as he ssees fit in the w/e- never before 10am and never after 7pm. Very considerate wouldn't you say?

[Storm]

The offending drummer did want to Roundup his front lawn with "I love the drummer!" Thought that was a bit obvious. We had a few biker friends around to pull wheelies as they left. Funny thing is I got woken up by THEIR alarm clock at 6.20 one Saturday morning-I should have complained but..
My dear old mum taught me that revenge is a dish best eaten cold and my Dad says all things come to those who wait.
Now the young fella wants to learn Bagpipes i might get my revenge eh?
BTW - he doesn't practice for hours at a time, plays his electric guitar unamped and plays keyboard thru headphones. Normally does drum practice some time between 4pm and 6pm week days and as he ssees fit in the w/e- never before 10am and never after 7pm. Very considerate wouldn't you say?

Encourage your boy with all your heart. He want to learn the fine scottish instrument, then encourage him. I can say from personal experience that theres nothing like a sunday morning 7am wakeup call, from the top of the house.

[ManDownUnder]

Get up early,

Fill the mower...
Start the mower...
Set the revs to a conservative level... it'll last longer
Put the mower right by the fence - that part nearest their house
Go out

[Skyryder]

The guy may have hearing like mine - I have really sensitive hearing and hear things that most other people can't, and I know for a fact that drumming would 'get to me' so to speak. Is this guy only complaining about the one hour lesson on a Saturday morning? If so, he is being a bit unreasonable, but does your son practice during the week? If he is drumming for a few hours a day as well, then sorry, but I'd be complaining too.

When we lived in town I could hear this thumping bass at 1am and knew there was nothing I could do about it unless I found out where it was coming from. I got dressed and went for a walk to track it down - believe it or not, it was coming from 800m away (I know the distance because I worked in the next street) - it was the bar at the police station!

We were also driven mad by the Jake the Muss wanna-be across the road who would crank the stereo up at 6pm on a Friday and it would still be going at 10am the following morning. The music was so loud our windows would vibrate! Noise control were too scared to do anything, so we had to put up with it until he got evicted for not paying his rent.

Some noises affect some people more than others - I can't bear the sound of wind turbines whereas my husband can't even hear them. I hear a friend's pacemaker ticking - he can't even hear it! So if your neighbour has hearing like mine, then I can sympathise with him. I used to dread coming home from work because I'd be subjected to noise from at least four or five neighbours - the guy next door like to take three hours to mow a pocket-handkerchief sized lawn; the guy over the back had the radio tuned to sports all year round and liked to sit outside and listen to it; Jake always had his stereo going; his neighbour would try and drown him out, and the old lady across the road would have the tv on so loud you could turn the sound down on yours.

People work hard and like to relax when they come home and in order to relax, peace and quiet is desirable. You may have had very accommodating neighbours in the past - or very deaf ones - and this guy may not be unreasonable.

I'm just bloody glad we were able to afford a place in the country - the noisiest things we have to deal with now are new-born lambs and the dawn chorus!

I know exactly where you are coming from on this. Use to work with woodworking machinery a few years back and one thing that use to realy upset me is the neighbour mowing their lawn on a Sunday. Noise five days a week. Noise on Saturday no problem there. Can be the only day people get their work done, lawns, chainsaw etc. But Sunday, even for half and hour use to rag me up. Then there was the fucking rooster that use to start crowing at five am in the morning. By the end of daylight saving I was a wreck. Kid you not. So if the neighbour is suffering from an overabundance on noise then he may well have a gripe.

However if it is only for an hour a week as the post suggests then he is being unreasonable. Just hope it does not blow up in any way

Beemer you may be interested in THE NIGHTINGALE FLOOR by Lian Hearn The main charactor Tomasu has acute hearing, among other talents.

http://www.sfsite.com/10b/an138.htm

Skyryder

[Skyryder]

Get up early,

Fill the mower...
Start the mower...
Set the revs to a conservative level... it'll last longer
Put the mower right by the fence - that part nearest their house
Go out

Dumb. Recipe for a disaster. People have been known to kill due to 'audio intimidation.'


Skyryder

[Beemer]

I know exactly where you are coming from on this. Use to work with woodworking machinery a few years back and one thing that use to realy upset me is the neighbour mowing their lawn on a Sunday. Noise five days a week. Noise on Saturday no problem there. Can be the only day people get their work done, lawns, chainsaw etc. But Sunday, even for half and hour use to rag me up. Then there was the fucking rooster that use to start crowing at five am in the morning. By the end of daylight saving I was a wreck. Kid you not. So if the neighbour is suffering from an overabundance on noise then he may well have a gripe.

However if it is only for an hour a week as the post suggests then he is being unreasonable. Just hope it does not blow up in any way

Beemer you may be interested in THE NIGHTINGALE FLOOR by Lian Hearn The main charactor Tomasu has acute hearing, among other talents.

http://www.sfsite.com/10b/an138.htm

Skyryder

Thanks Skyryder, I'll check that out! I know what you mean about noise at work and noise at home - I worked in a call centre for a while and having headphones on with someone yabbering in your ear all day was really tiring. I would get home and within minutes someone would turn their stereo on and I would get so pissed off it wasn't funny! And then the bastards over the back bought a rooster and left it there when they moved! Damn thing would start crowing at 4.30am and then crow all afternoon as well. I rang the council and they reckoned it was legal to keep one inside the town boundaries - even though their animal control officers said it wasn't - so they wouldn't do anything about it. I contacted animal control myself and the guy tried for three weeks to catch it. In the end the SPCA lent me a magpie trap and I got it. Originally the plan was to give it to a friend in the country, but I was so irritated with it by then I told the guy to wring its bloody neck!

Nice here where we live now - the only sounds today are lambs bleating, the neighbour trimming his hedge with electric clippers (sounds like a sewing machine!) and bird song - bliss!

[NC]

Dumb. Recipe for a disaster. People have been known to kill due to 'audio intimidation.'


Skyryder

Earplugs

[Ixion]

..
Nice here where we live now - the only sounds today are lambs bleating, the neighbour trimming his hedge with electric clippers (sounds like a sewing machine!) and bird song - bliss!

You must have quieter birds than me. Noisy little bastiges start up before dawn and make enough noise to wake the dead. Is actually surprising if you measure it how loud birds are. Was a case years ago when some Grundy complained about the noise from a motor-racing circuit in UK (Goodwood ?). Noice bods brought out their gear, and measured noise. Reported that loudest noise was teh birds.

'Tis not just the volume of noise, it is also the sort of noise. We like birds so we don't notice it. There's a guy lives somewhere near us and has a two stroke. He must start work early and Mrs Ixion complains about the noise waking her at 6am (never seen it, just heard it ). Never wakes me, I like the sound of two strokes.

[Beemer]

You must have quieter birds than me. Noisy little bastiges start up before dawn and make enough noise to wake the dead. Is actually surprising if you measure it how loud birds are. Was a case years ago when some Grundy complained about the noise from a motor-racing circuit in UK (Goodwood ?). Noice bods brought out their gear, and measured noise. Reported that loudest noise was teh birds.

'Tis not just the volume of noise, it is also the sort of noise. We like birds so we don't notice it. There's a guy lives somewhere near us and has a two stroke. He must start work early and Mrs Ixion complains about the noise waking her at 6am (never seen it, just heard it ). Never wakes me, I like the sound of two strokes.

So true, when we first moved out to the country we found we were waking at first light because of the birds! We got used to it pretty quickly but I still notice how noisy it is at dusk when they settle into the trees for the night. But as you say, because we like the sound of the birds, it doesn't irritate us.

Shows what kind of neighbours we have - when we moved in they said they hoped their daughters' piano playing in the afternoons didn't disturb us! They are Brethren so it's just a piano, no amp or anythng, and both girls can play really well, so we're more than happy on the odd occasions that we can hear it - which is only by the boundary, out by the garage!

[myvice]

Fun with neighbours:
A truck of Zoodoo might be fun but a friendly dump truck driver can do all sorts of nasty things for a case of beer.
Gardens don’t like Round Up.
Get a bunch of Hells Angels to turn up for a coffee one Sunday.
If you can, get their E-mail (if they have one) and send it to every porn site you can find.
Mouse trap in the letterbox.
Water balloons filled with paint.
Claymore on the doorstep.
Tip off the cops "it’s a P lab"
Fill the house with NO2, will keep them happy.
C4.
Make up a fake "We will be putting 40,000 volt pylons through your property on the 7/3/06" letter, then they will leave.
Keep free-range chickens.
Keep free-range pitbulls.
Buy a digeridoo.
Better yet, bagpipes!
More C4.
Jog naked.
Sheet metal sculpture with an angle grinder.
RC helicopter.
Street drags.
Local hero parade.
Cuban death squad.
Burning cross lawn ornament.
S.A.M. battery.
Free range howler monkeys.
Salvation Army bands 4am wake up call.
20/20 on their doorstep.
Super glue on the door handle.
Turn the water off.
Turn the power off.
Have Coronation St cancelled.
Convince the local Jehovah Witless church that they need saving.
Buy a V twin with open headers.
Convince the local Mormon Church that they need saving.
S.A.S hostage training house.
Train a band of "killer" ferrets to attack their feet every morning.
Send to Oz for a carton of fire ants and build a nest on their back lawn (bull ants are also a good option)
Build a little fortress in the long grass and have long loud discussions with your imaginary friend on how to rid the earth of their fiendish regime.
Build a little fortress and just sing loudly to your imaginary friend (out of key)
Train a band of girl scouts to sing "buy our biscuits, buy our biscuits!!" from out of your little fortress (out of key!)
Move your fortress to their front doorstep.
Convince the local church of Satin that they need saving.
Get another 200 or so cats.
Keep bats.
Paint yourself with camo paint and hide in the middle of the front lawn, with binoculars trained on the house.
Join the RX7 club.
Get the local kids into motoX.

Don’t ask me, I don’t know.
(I put this on another thread but it might help)