Ask Grandpa...

[yungatart]

The Sun is an incredible thing. It in effect "eats" itself, yet it has enough reserves of hot stuff that it may never run out, and the best estimates of science is that it will last at least several billion years yet.

Are you sure?

My (then) three year old told me it ate the moon...these are his questions, when i was stumped on that one, he told me I was silly... and gave me his answer

[MSTRS:Me]

Grandma, unfortunately is resisting being persuaded to wear those funny stockings and brandish a wip...

Nope. She was definitely dressed as described. I must have caught her in a moment of weakness. Don't you wish you had...?

[FJRider]

Why do Aucklanders seem to think they are more important than everybody else ... ???

[Edbear]

Are you sure?

My (then) three year old told me it ate the moon...these are his questions, when i was stumped on that one, he told me I was silly... and gave me his answer

I confess I haven't been there to examine it closely but I have read much from science on it. The general consensus of scientific opinion is that it is self-sustaining.

Your poor wee son may be disconcerted to know the moon remains healthily distant from the Sun and serves as an effective mirror for our enjoyment. It also influences the tides with its magnetic pull and by this your dear son may explore the beaches to see what was washed up by the last tide.

[Edbear]

Nope. She was definitely dressed as described. I must have caught her in a moment of weakness. Don't you wish you had...?

The only time I can catch Grandma is in a moment of weakness...

Why do Aucklanders seem to think they are more important than everybody else ... ???

Aucklanders, my dear Sir, are so stressed and busy with their own lives and battling traffic they have precious little time to think of anything but where they need to be next. Not so much thinking they are more important than anyone else, more that they don't have time to think about anyone else.

[MSTRS:Me]

...more that they don't have time to think about anyone else.

All that sitting about in traffic that's not going anywhere should mean they have MORE time to think than the rest of the country. Or is that when they catch up on sleep?

[yungatart]

I confess I haven't been there to examine it closely but I have read much from science on it. The general consensus of scientific opinion is that it is self-sustaining.

Your poor wee son may be disconcerted to know the moon remains healthily distant from the Sun and serves as an effective mirror for our enjoyment. It also influences the tides with its magnetic pull and by this your dear son may explore the beaches to see what was washed up by the last tide.

He was three then, and thought he knew everything. Now he is 20, going on 21, and knows that he knows everything!

I am hoping he outgrows it soon....

[paturoa]

Why are anagrams of "Ask Grandpa Edbear" just a little spooky?

Bad A grade spanker.
Pa drags naked bear.
Baked grandpa arse.
Bad arse aged prank.

[FJRider]

Why are anagrams of "Ask Grandpa Edbear" just a little spooky?

Bad A grade spanker.
Pa drags naked bear.
Baked grandpa arse.
Bad arse aged prank.

Because you have far too much spare time ...

[Edbear]

All that sitting about in traffic that's not going anywhere should mean they have MORE time to think than the rest of the country. Or is that when they catch up on sleep?

Thinking is an art form and regrettably there are few real artists in Auckland traffic...

He was three then, and thought he knew everything. Now he is 20, going on 21, and knows that he knows everything!

I am hoping he outgrows it soon....

Our son is 36 and still thinks he knows everything...

Why are anagrams of "Ask Grandpa Edbear" just a little spooky?

Bad A grade spanker.
Pa drags naked bear.
Baked grandpa arse.
Bad arse aged prank.

Grandpa Edbear is a spooky thing to see, esp. in his birthday suit at night when he emits an eerie glow. He is very good at spanking, though not so successful in getting spanked.

[paturoa]

Because you have far too much spare time ...

Nope, old = cunning http://wordsmith.org/anagram/index.html

[Bikemad]

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

[mashman]

If the the data returned from the LHC proves the existence of the Higgs Boson particle, does that mean that God doesn't exist?

[curly]

At a movie theater which armrest is yours?

[Bikemad]

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
When you go to Heaven, do you wear the clothes you were buried in forever?