Actually, it was all to the good. Her Mum's disapproval of me was more successsful than all my importunities in getting her to discard her inhibitions ( amongst other items)Originally Posted by bugjuice
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Actually, it was all to the good. Her Mum's disapproval of me was more successsful than all my importunities in getting her to discard her inhibitions ( amongst other items)Originally Posted by bugjuice
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Originally Posted by skidmark
Originally Posted by Phil Vincent
Had a sparrow inbed its self in my radiator,
did not realize until i stopped at some lights,
buy this time the bird had started to cook,![]()
people thought i was quit mad sitting on the
side of the road plucking feathers and bits out my bike
like some werd magic trick.
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the art of diplomacy is saying nice doggie,
until you find a big rock
I was actually "attacked" by a small dog as I stopped at the intersection near his house... nope did not hit him...![]()
Little bugger sure could bite.![]()
Northbound on southern motorway many moons ago, at pace, 2am, walking human shape in my lane flashes past, took a while for brain to comprehend that someone would actually cross the motorway on foot and the mess it would have been if I'd been two feet to the left.
P.s ("at pace" please insert 100kmh officer)
The scareyes /worst experience i've had was when I first started riding.
I was following a truck and a gust of wind lifted a sheet of roofing iron up off the back.I ducked down as it came flying at me -It bounced off my lid and packrack before hitting the ground behind me.
I stopped shaking about a week later.
To see a life newly created.To watch it grow and prosper. Isn't that the greatest gift a human being can be given?
Two 14 y/o schoolgirls who thought I was big and macho on my GN250
uh..
yeah had one hell of a time getting away from them
The ones I love are:
Women pushing puschairs-the ones that push the kid out from between two parked cars,and while the kid is three feet out in the lane, in traffic,stop to see if anything is coming-sometimes you get to see the look of terror on the kid's face.
I was following my brother to the castrol six hour,every dead possum he passed the passage would stir up all the blow flies(why do they call them"Blow"flies) and I'd have the benefit of running through the cloud of the buggers.
I was in the car,when a pheasant just missed getting nailed as it flew across my path,but it wasn't so lucky ,it hit an oncoming car which launched it back at my windsheild at head level.Having gained in excess of 100 km/h velocity,when it hit my windshield at a closing velocity of over 220 km/h it turn into a feather bomb. Surprisingly the glass didn't break.
I've narrowly escaped certain death at the hands of an agressive gumboot on SH22.
We're all fucked. I'm fucked. You're fucked. The whole department is fucked. It's the biggest cock-up ever. We're all completely fucked.
-Sir Richard Mottram
you can go straight to jail for that.. and you don't pass go and don't collect $200Originally Posted by thehollowmen
i've come across a few rabbits and possums that have attemted running the same way as me.... away??? amusing as it may seem it is not good practice to assist them with ones boot....... FARKIN sore foot and kinda dodge......
The world stands aside to let anyone pass who knows where he is going....
I had this in a Kiwi Rider a few years ago now.
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Unique hazzards
It was ideal. Temperature just right for riding in leather, cloudless, hint of a tail wind, I'd been in the saddle all morning and just reached that point where you become 'one' with the machine, you're so in tune that the handling has become automatic, you're feeling and steering with your whole body, totally immersed in the experience. Harmony.
There were seven of us cutting an arc west of the Great Divide headed from Newcastle to a rally North of Brisbane. Crossing the Plains West of Tamworth on wide sweeping well-made road carrying little traffic. Craig had the front; the pace was brisk and comfortable. I was sitting 'One in, one back' and having about as good a party as you can have - in a helmet.
We crested a rise and suddenly Craig swerved - violently. It was a brilliant, quick and almost successful manoeuvre. He missed 'all but' the last 4 inches of an enormous Brown Snake that had been sunning itself, rather inconsiderately, across the racing line.
By the time I flashed past a split second later, the thing was about 3 feet in the air, turning itself in knots, striking at anything and everything, including itself, and extremely errr….angry.
I set a personal best for ' longest distance travelled whilst using one 'F' word' and if Can-Can dancing on a motorcycle ever becomes popular - say you read about it here first! I'm sure it's the only time I've had my riding boots above my helmet while riding (except for that incident on the Bultaco when I was 14.)
The previous long distance profanity whilst leg lifting record was set in Tasmania, Co-pilot and I on the Tasman Highway, over the Tasman Bridge, crossing the Tasman Peninsula as we rode towards Tasman's Arch with the Tasman sea on our left. (Note no Wh shounds!).
We were running through some fine Tasmanian rain forest - the sort that would remind a Kiwi a little of the colour of home, when out of the corner of my eye there is a black and white something coming out of the ferny undergrowth - first thought without fixing vision was that it was a small Border Collie or something - what's a dog doing way out here??? But no.... sh*******tttt! It's a Tasmanian Devil, chasing us like a dog and having a real good go. Not sure what would have been funnier, the sight of us both synchronised leg lifting or the looks on our faces and eyes like saucers when we stopped and took helmets off and said 'DID YOU SEE THAT!!!!!’
Roos, Emus, Wombats, even Tassie Devils all act like big, stupid, launching ramps in the glare of the best quartz halogens. If you are across the ditch and touring after dark in the bush - exercise extreme caution at all times. Better still, find a Pub and settle in for the night.
I’m happy to say that apart from a few Queen Street evangelists nothing in New Zealand has attacked me yet. I have had words with a sheep dog on a flat top that obviously didn’t understand the finer points of lane splitting but we sorted that out after we reached the end of his tether.
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I hit a dove at about 120kph flush on the cheek in an open face helmet since I wrote that lot too. Broke my Ray Bans and killed it instantly. I was unhurt apart from 'tearing up' a bit - from the impact not cause i was upset about the bird either thank you!
My new stripey bandit actually got a mynah the other day.
Has anyone managed to get a weasel?(Hard to hit)
One day when visiting a certain person in South Auckland it came time to leave,but he was busy with customers - I thought bugger it,started my bike,my girlfriend got on the back,I put the bike into gear...and then a doberman clamped his jaws on my ankle with no intention of letting go.His owner finaly came out and said...''oh,I haven't said you can go yet have I?'' No one left the property without permission and the dog knew that when the bike went into gear they were going.Originally Posted by Joni
In and out of jobs, running free
Waging war with society
Yep - done that.Originally Posted by sels1
3 drunks croww the road (two lanes going the same way... center line etc in town - New Plymouth).
2 run right across, one stops on the centre line so keep trundling along. The guys looks up (and you can see the booze fogged brain SLOWLY work it out)..
"My friends made - I can too". So he runs!
oopsie - turns out he was wrong and I hit his leg (the rest of him had fortunatley passed in front of me)... and I knocked it out from under him.
not good...
anyhoo - that's my sad sack story
MDU
$2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details
Not on a bike but I was driving a tractor with a big 9metre rack putting some hay into rows and this lamb bolts our from its hiding place in the long grass on the edge of the paddock right in to my two big rotors spinning at a fair old rate.
By the time I make it out to offer my assitance it was pretty messed up, poor little thing, felt pretty bad after that.
Farmers.... www.farmtalk.co.nz
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