Oo'eer. "You were clocked at 128kph. Don't do it again"

[Ixion]

Well, I can now confirm there are decent coppers still out there.

Mrs Ixion needed a new cake plate , so I had to ride to Cambridge (Yes, they MUST come from Cambridge. No, I don't know why. Don't ask.)

Cake plate secured, and in top box, it seemed logical to return via Morrinsville and SH27. Cos the ride down on SH1 was the MOST TEDIOUSLY BORING ride I have ever done. Memo to Transit. Do you realise , that in terms of functionality, of getting traffic from A to B, SH1 is now LESS efficient than it was in the 1950s ?

Bugger around losing time on the back roads behind Cambridge, finding SH26. Memo to Waikato District Council. Your signposting sucks. Memo to mapmakers. The roads don't go where your maps show.

Finally get onto SH27. Nice straight fast road. With some curvey bits

von Klunken approves of such roads . He settled down into his schnell-panzer mode. Rain set in , ho hum, I already had my waterproofs on, raised the screen , settled into a nice relaxed reverie in the quiet dry air behind the screen, listening absently to von Klunken droning on about the North German Plain, its superiority to the Hauraki plains, the superiority of Baverian beer over Prussian beer, the inferiority of all things French, and idly musing on how I could prevent my visor steaming up,cos of there being no air flow past it.

And so the miles flicked on. Nothing quite matches a BMW for effortlessly destroying distance. Only problem is, on a fast road , under such circumstances, one becomes careless about keeping an eye on the speedo.

Not much traffic on this road. But here comes a little convoy of cars. And some sixth sense wakes up, and starts jumping up and down, ringing a little bell and waving a flag. Oi,oi, watch out there. Dunno why, but I don't like that convoy. Glance at the speedo - Ooo-errr , close the throttle and wash off speed. Convoy goes past.

Oh-oh, why is that car pulling left? And doing a U-turn. And -- OH SHIT.

Quick (very quick) stop. Shititty shit. How fast WAS I going when he pinged me? Oh shit. I must surely have washed off a good bit of speed before he was close enough to get a lock.

Well, I soon find out. "Clocked at 128kph. Sir! Any reason you were going so fast" (Phew. that's not *SO* fast. So I did lose a bit before you got a reading. Phew. At worst a fine and some demerits) .How DO you answer that damn silly question? Cos I CAN, that's why.

Insert much groveling, supplication, contrition.

"Well, I'll let you go with a good telling off". blah blah about death rate between here and Bombay. "On your bike, and WATCH THE SPEED". Yes, Sir, officer! (I did watch it , too, for the rest of the way. Makes you very cautious does such an experience).

So, I can confirm the legend. There are good coppers out there. And discretion is still alive and kicking.

Thank you Officer Plod. (He was a ginga too!. How about that). Nice guy.

But, I'm jolly glad that sixth sense made me drop off that extra 20kph or so. He might not have been so decent about that. So thanks also to the Helmut von Horny Humper and the other biker gods, and thanks to BMW for building lots of engine braking into their bikes.

But - grateful though I am to a decent copper, I have to ask, what the HELL was he doing on SH27? What happened to the rule about traffic cops sticking to state highways with numbers less than 10? 27. that's NOT less than 10. Can't cops count? Not cricket , I reckon. Especially in a mufti car. Damn hard to spot a mufti coming toward you.

[Motu]

eeeeeee,it's a wake up call alright.I've done my bit of undignified grovelling,sometimes the need arises to make someone else feel superior,and guilty for making a grown man cry.I don't trust any late model cars - I'd hate to own a late model Commondore when I'm around,I'll slow down so much they need to pass.

[crashe]

Hmmmmm you were lucky weren't you...

[Ixion]

Yes. I have been wondering why.

My groveling is not always so successful. It did (later) occur to me that maybe he didn't get a fix on me ,or, him being a mufti, he maybe didn't even have a radar, but decided a fright was in order, so made up a speed figure.

Either that, or that last virgin I sacrificed to Helmut von Horny Humper was a particularly juicy one.

[NhuanH]

You saying Von Klunken is capable of such warp speeds?
I'd ask Orificer for his calibration certificate...

[Quartida]

It did (later) occur to me that maybe he didn't get a fix on me ,or, him being a mufti, he maybe didn't even have a radar, but decided a fright was in order, so made up a speed figure.

But seeing as it seems to be overall such a positive experience, lets give him the benefit of the doubt.

It's nice to hear the good stuff, isn't it.

[Blackbird]

I take it that the conversation took place AFTER you removed your helmet Mr Ix? Cop sees venerable gentleman, either takes pity on him on account of extreme age or more charitably, deduces that he's been around a bit and is not the sort of person who rides a Gixxer (snigger). Hence, the letting off. However, If you wove the plate tale into the conversation, he may have deduced that you were in for a real bollocking from Mrs Ix on your return and had real sympathy for your predicament. In any event, well done

PS. The locals sometimes remove the signs round the back of Cambridge because the lifestylers don't like traffic volumes. I kid you not.

Geoff

[skidMark]

when travelling along on the thursday night ride once upon a time on a rather large straight my speed creaped up on my on the gpx when i had it....

came over the hill whats that in the distance arr shit.....two coppas sitting in thier marked petrol with radar going...they hop out stand in the road and point for me to goto the side.....so i pull over noting boomer is there on his 600 looking extremely sad and depressed...and i'm thinking hmmm he mustve been going for it......

they say come here to me and say look at the radar.....** so i peared through the cop car window ** 150 ...instantly..i knew what that meant.....100 k zone and over 40 over the limit...at this point my heart feels like it's falling at warp 9 and i'm thinking bye bye bike bye bye license.

he says how do you care to explain your speed sir.....**thinks fast**....

i say well i can't believe it theres no way thats possibly...he says whys that.... i say well my bike won't even do that speed....he says well weve got you radared at that... why were you speeding he says..... and i said i ddn't know i was speeding my speedo only said 95.....he says how do you explain your speed...i say once more i didn't know i was speeding the speedo only said 95....he gets my license off me and runs it asnd as he does a commodore comes in which they stop and signal him to the side they had him at 174 and within 30 seconds along came the tow truck....they both start doing over the holden driver....

he walks up to me gives me my license back and says just keep the speed down mate...

i sort of stand there for a min or so wondering if i'm ok to go yet or not

he comes back and goes yeah mate you can bugger off now....

i then took the first breath i'd taken for 5 minutes and wen't on my merry little way...they gave boomer a ticket for not to warrentable standard because of numberplate not readable and no plate light...

and 300 bucks for i think 134 or something....

poor bugger

but as i say this was a while back...i now don't speed cus it just aint worth it that night was one big wake up call for me

[Clivoris]

Fabulous escape Ixion, and may the ginga coppa have an excellent week. It's nice to get a break every now and then. May it be the first of many.

[Lou Girardin]

and idly musing on how I could prevent my visor steaming up,cos of there being no air flow past it.

.

Try a helmet gaitor. You get them from the army surplus store by the billboard of the pneumatic woman.

[Beemer]

Seems the opposite of my beloved's experience a few weeks ago. Club ride heading north around Waiouru/Ohakune, most of the group was ahead of him as he'd thought they were stopping in Taihape for lunch and he'd got his jacket and helmet off before someone told him they weren't. He'd caught up to another club rider who was at the back of the group when a cop came around a blind corner and on went the lights. He said they were doing about 120 and at first they thought they were going to get a warning. The cop asked if they were with the group he'd just passed and when they said yes, he said to let them know they'd been going a bit fast. He chatted about the bikes, said he rode too, and then went to his car with their licences. He was gone for a long time and they realised he was probably writing a ticket - and sure enough, he was. He said the other rider had been going faster than my husband, but he would give them both a ticket for 120 so it wouldn't cost as much. Wow, how generous. I asked if they had been shown the radar speed he'd locked on but he said no, and I can't figure out how he can give both riders a ticket under these circumstances. The rest of the group were obviously caning it but he knew he'd have no chance of picking off one of them so he didn't bother. So unfortunately we only seem to meet the cops who still give out tickets rather than warnings!

[scumdog]

Beemer, if it is as true as you say he should be defending it, that's crap that sort of stuff!!!

Make sure the other guy does too - go and see who the cops boss is too so he knows.

[Ixion]

Try a helmet gaitor. You get them from the army surplus store by the billboard of the pneumatic woman.

But that would produce the reverse effect of that desired, surely?

The helmet mists up because there is no air flow through it to remove the warm, moisture air produced by breathing.

Applying any sort of closure to the helmet will only make that worse.

What I need is a way to induce flowing air into the helmet vent system, without disturbing the general airflow. I can, obviously, put the screen down, which fixes the misting, but then I get wet.

[wybmadiity]

Must admit I have been pretty lucky with striking somewhat forgiving ones. Caught on bike when learning to ride (no licence) given 28days to get one. Been pulled up doing 110k in 100 zone not ment to go over 70k no L plate, told me to take it easy. Think Te puke cops arn't on a quota! Yay for them!

[Beemer]

Beemer, if it is as true as you say he should be defending it, that's crap that sort of stuff!!!

Make sure the other guy does too - go and see who the cops boss is too so he knows.

I told him that he should challenge it because even if the cop got one of them on the radar, how can he say which one it was and whether both were doing a similar speed, but he says he can't be bothered. The other rider (female) probably won't bother either, she'd more than likely be thrilled her bike could actually go that fast...

He said as he was in front, he fully expected that if one of them was going to get a ticket, it would be him, but then the cop said the other rider had been going faster (he mentioned 122kph) but he would drop the speed back to 120 for both of them. If she was doing 122, then my husband may not have been doing even 120 but he's been ticketed for that.

The worst thing was, one of the morons in the club (sorry, but he really acted like one) rang wanting my husband's mobile number. I said as he never had it turned on except when he wanted to ring me, it would be a waste of time, and asked why he wanted it. "Oh, it's just we're in Ohakune and were wondering when he and (other rider) were going to get here because the last time we saw them, they were on the side of the road with flashing lights." This dickhead hadn't even seen the incident, someone following in a car had told him about it, so at that point I had no idea if he had been pulled up for speeding and the flashing lights were a cop car, or if there had been an accident and the lights were from an ambulance! I had a very worrying half hour until he rang me, and I certainly know who will be nominated for the Wally Award at the next club night...