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Thread: "He went mad so we shot him..."

  1. #1
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    "He went mad so we shot him..."

    Just had a telemarketer of some sort ring me here at the store. Lady with an accent, possibly Indian (surprise surprise!).

    She asked to speak to my predecessor here. Conversation went something like this...

    She: "May I speak to RB please?"
    Me: "Sorry luv, you're four years too late!"
    She: (after a wee pause) "Oh...what happened to him then?"
    Me: "Oh...he went mad so we shot him!!"
    She: (stunned silence this time) "My God! That's TERRIBLE!!"
    Me: (milking the moment) "Yeah - it was terrible - he was dangerous - we just had to shoot him."
    She: "............" (she was silent)...at which point I started to snigger just a bit...
    Me: "Nah it's OK luv, he just sold the place to me..."
    She: (somewhat irate I think) "I was just about to call the police and send them to that place!!!!!"
    Me: "Don't bother, we got rid of the evidence at the time..."
    She: (obviously totally confused now) "Did you shoot him or NOT???"
    Me: "Nah luv, it's just a saying we have here when people ask for someone who isn't here..."
    She: (doubtfully) "I was thinking you had really shot him!"
    Me: (brightly) "Hell no - we wouldn't waste a bullet like that! Anyway, can I help you at all?"
    She: (doubtfully) "Errrmmm...no, I don't think so - I had to talk to RB"
    Me: "OK then, have a nice day..."
    She: (kinda quietly now) "...bye..."


    Hehehe. Telemarketers are the most fun! Bet she doesn't call back...Hmmm - is that police car stopping here?
    . “No pleasure is worth giving up for two more years in a rest home.” Kingsley Amis

  2. #2
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    Some people have no sense of the ridiculous.
    Or what is reality.
    Or something or not or whatever.
    ... and that's what I think.

    Or summat.


    Or maybe not...

    Dunno really....


  3. #3
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    i like to ask what they are wearing

  4. #4
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    So - did you shoot him?

    Maybe you did and you're in denial?

    Need a hug?

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by hospitalfood View Post
    i like to ask what they are wearing
    I like to watch.
    ... and that's what I think.

    Or summat.


    Or maybe not...

    Dunno really....


  6. #6
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    You should have kept the 'prank' going for as long as possible, see if the fuzz show up.

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by AllanB View Post
    So - did you shoot him?

    Maybe you did and you're in denial?

    Need a hug?

    Nah, I left the gun at home that day - all good thanks.

    Quote Originally Posted by SMOKEU View Post
    You should have kept the 'prank' going for as long as possible, see if the fuzz show up.
    It was tempting...
    . “No pleasure is worth giving up for two more years in a rest home.” Kingsley Amis

  8. #8
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    Imagine if she asked "What are you having for tea?"and your reply "pigs tits and custard".
    Hello officer put it on my tab

    Don't steal the government hates competition.

  9. #9
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    Good stuff!!!!

    Reminds me of this
    [YOUTUBE]un_PjRXV5l8[/YOUTUBE]
    $2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by slofox View Post
    ...
    Hmmm - is that police car stopping here?
    Yeah, but what country would she ring the Police in? The Police are probably busy beating the crap out of some person in Bangalore.

  11. #11
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    haha good one. when they ask something like "would you like to buy insurance off us" i ask "nah, do you want to?" . or when clearly its a hoax like "you have won a holiday overseas" etc (dodgy sounding asian) i say "nah, you have mate, give me your credit card number"
    Thats whats up.

  12. #12
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    Someone needs to check under your floorboards just in case

  13. #13
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    just tell them im real interested and that i need to turn the tv down so i can hear them and will be back in a moment, and then put the phone down and go watch TV , the record is 22mins someone waited once , so bring it on.

  14. #14
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    Tell them you want phone sex

  15. #15
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    got a call from a carpet cleaning company once....


    'hi,.. this is XYZ carpet cleaning.. we wi.....'



    'wow.. hows that for freaky.. i was just about to call someone... can you get blood out of carpet????..im mean... theres ALOT of it...'



    the conversation went downhill from there...
    Life is tough. It's tougher when you're stupid

    SARGE
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