Tell us your funny stories.

[roadracingoldfart]

Wanganui one year and the Honda 455 was cutting it ok in qualifying and I did some good laps to make it on the 2nd row.
I had just made a fairing for it and as it was untried I fitted it after qualifying in case I damaged it .
The race started and every time I got half way through a right hander (common at Wangas) the motor cut out , it would suddenly come back to life when I straightened and the rush of power made it pop huge wheelies out of the corners and I was surprised nobody went past me during the race.
At the end of the race I came round the 1st bend and it cut out again and I tentatively waited for it to come back on song but to no avail . Bugger , dead engine.
As I wasn’t close to the pits (they were on the riverbank in those days) I waited for the trailer. The race caller , Rambling Ray was commenting how the bike that came in 4th had so much power the rider couldn’t keep the front wheel on the road and that was his demise , he had a co- commentator I didn’t know that offered the advice I de-tuned the bike to allow better results.
I wasn’t aware it was me they were talking about as the guys in front had vanished ahead and I didn’t know where I finished. I was wondering who had the very powerful bike and wished I had his engine lol. As it transpired , an earth wire was slipping in and out of its plug because I fitted the fairing with the cable round the wrong side of the main stay but I was super amazed when I found I had come 4th.
Next race , all wiring sorted and I could hear Ray talking about the #74 and watch him out of the corners this race , I suddenly reaslised I was the subject of his previous ramblings lol. The flag fell and I was doing ok , 6th I think and every time I went to accelerate I was nervous but it ran fine , I got a bit relaxed and suddenly suffered from Ground , sky , ground , sky , haybale. (fuck it hurt) .
As I was waiting for the trailer again I heard Ray comment on me quoting my number this time and I was getting applauded for what I thought was the high side so I stood up and took a bow and gave a wave to my addoring crowd. I then realised I was not the reason for the cheering at all as there was a chick with huge tits giving a flash to all and sundry .
I took 3 things from that meeting ,
-Build the bike properly ,
-remember the good times ,
-and
-always put your helmet back on when you make a dick of yourself lol.

Paul.

[woodyracer]

When at the TRRS that woodyracer idiot took off with the classics on a staggered start....

[Robert Taylor]

Craig Shirriffs once told me a story how he was going to win a superbike race ,he even said he was going to do it on a honda , that just sent me into tears of laughter

Your first effort at Tigcraft swingarm reconstruction, that was pretty funny!

[Mishy]

Oh, so many stories !

I crashed mt RS250 at Ruapuna during practice for the John Britten Memorial. Coming out of the sweeper it just came right round on me, and I took the soft option of sitting down instead of hanging on.
When i stopped rolling I got up to look for my bike - and it just plain wasn't there !
I looked out, in, forward, all over the place- no bike ! Very confused, and kinda funny to watch
Turns out that the thing put itself back on it's wheels after I bailed, and kept turning left - like really left. It ended up WAY back behind me in the in field

One tme (at band camp) I was lucky enough to hitch a ride back from Puke with Dallas Rankine and Dick Hurdeman.
I can still vividly remeber Dick hanging out the window, wearing his flouro orange and yellow KFC glasses, squirting people as we drove through Te Awamutu with his equally silly gay coloured waterpistol.
Those that have met Dick would get it

And then there's the "magic egg" that managed to get thrown (I think by Craig shirriffs) in through the window of Gary Cunningham's van, bounce off Dave Manuel in the passengers seat without breaking, and hit the INSIDE of the van behind them, slatering the inside of the van and the bikes in goo
I think they (hot day and all) discovered that after about 6 hours driving, and gary was still finding bits of egg in his bike the next day after practice

[roadracingoldfart]

One really really windy day at manfeild , it had been raining for most of the week before hand and the track had a puddle of water on both sides down the back straight.
You had to hit the centre of the track to miss the water but the wind was coming bigtime from the N.W and blowing us outwards. This one time down the back and the gust was huge and i was blown towards the water , i managed to scrub some speed off and just when i thought i had it sussed the gust intensified and i was waterlogged on the left of the track. Front went out and i was water skiing on my back. I slid for ages and when i was going slow enough i sort of just dug my feet in and stood up . Well when you crash at 150 kmh you actually dont really scrub off speed when water is involved. I promptly nose dived big time and face planted into the grass and water and with a massive splash and bow wave continued to slide. The bike was fine but i was sore and i sat the day out after that . A guy unknown to me came running up all excited at prizegiving and said he had caught the whole thing on his motor drive camera and did i want to buy a copy. He then told me how much he wanted for the prints (all 20 odd) and i knew i could never afford them all so i got 2 , one with a bow wave like a jetsprint boat feet first , and one with me standing on my head in the grass. I got the hard luck award that year for my antics and i think it was in a copy of the Oily Rag as well.

Paul.

[roadracingoldfart]

Oh, so many stories !

I crashed mt RS250 at Ruapuna during practice for the John Britten Memorial. Coming out of the sweeper it just came right round on me, and I took the soft option of sitting down instead of hanging on.
When i stopped rolling I got up to look for my bike - and it just plain wasn't there !
I looked out, in, forward, all over the place- no bike ! Very confused, and kinda funny to watch
Turns out that the thing put itself back on it's wheels after I bailed, and kept turning left - like really left. It ended up WAY back behind me in the in field


One tme (at band camp) I was lucky enough to hitch a ride back from Puke with Dallas Rankine and Dick Hurdeman.
I can still vividly remeber Dick hanging out the window, wearing his flouro orange and yellow KFC glasses, squirting people as we drove through Te Awamutu with his equally silly gay coloured waterpistol.
Those that have met Dick would get it

Same happened to me , came out of Coke , highsides in the wet and the bike was nowhere to be seen. It managed to get all the way to the old drainage ditch behind the signal box on the infield lol. A marshall found it for me after i gave up .

And i bet Dallas was egging Dick on big time. lol.

[Dreama]

Central BEARs meeting about 10 years ago, Manfield long track, early Feb.
There was maize growing alongside the back part of the track.
Dicing with someone who was trying hard to stay in front and he cocked up that sharp righthand corner before the back hairpin.
He goes straight ahead into a wall of fully grown maize ... as I round the corner I glimpse maize plants flying through the air !!
Laughing so much I barely stopped for the next corner.
Caught up with the victim later who said it was scary as hell ... lotsa noise and couldn't see anything as he smashed into the plants and then a dead stop when he hit something.... he carried on for a bit over the bars then took awhile to find his way out !!

He was still all green hours later.

As the day progressed that track into the maize got bigger and bigger.

[Dodgy]

Oh, so many stories !
And then there's the "magic egg" that managed to get thrown (I think by Craig shirriffs) in through the window of Gary Cunningham's van, bounce off Dave Manuel in the passengers seat without breaking, and hit the INSIDE of the van behind them, slatering the inside of the van and the bikes in goo
I think they (hot day and all) discovered that after about 6 hours driving, and gary was still finding bits of egg in his bike the next day after practice

Yes, that was the "magic egg" indeed - Craig was driving the gimp bus and casually threw it over his shoulder and out the window. For all the trays of eggs that were thrown on that trip - that was definitely the winning shot!


I remember (well, not really remember) highsiding over a oil leak onto the rear tyre on my F3 singles racer out the hairpin at the Manfield reverse circuit. Apparently, I kept it WFO even tho I had spun 180 degrees. So it was a goody and when I finally woke up (the beeping of the ambulance reversing did it) - I was somehow convinced that I was lying on the beach and couldnt quite figure out why the hell I had my helmet on! It took a few hours at hospital before I could figure what my name was!