Child abuse: when the FUCK are we going to actually take this seriously?

[MSTRS:Me]

I dunno.... I really don't.

I think you do, Paul. As do I.
Problem remains that it takes ruined lives first to bring these arseholes into the light.

[Mom]

I fostered children for many years, many years ago. Last placement in my home would have to be 16 years ago.

I can state, with some confidence, that nothing, absolutely NOTHING has changed in all the years since I stopped taking kids into my home, after a particularly challenging placement.

I had to step back, many reasons for the decision, but primarily taking damaged children into your home is a family decision and my family decided that we had had enough.

I am currently trying to read my way through Ian Wisharts book about the Kahui Twins deaths as told from the perspective of their mother Macsyna King. It is not an easy read, it brings back so many memories of the kids I used to love for a short time and the families that were "raising"them.


Nothing is going to change as long as we as a society continue to accept what goes on, and do not take an active role in "interferring" in others lives. These poor families have no idea what is normal, or how to change things when they have a small clue. Ignorance, poor education, no other examples to go by. If you know no better, how the hell are you going to change?

There are all sorts of on the ground agencies out here that help. They are not funded properly, nor are they able to simple "get stuck in" due to an over controlling PC society that insists the 70% of the money that might be available, gets used to fulfill or even to fill out the endless paper work.

Everyone of us can probably think of a family close by that we know is struggling. How about we simply wander along the road with a packet of biscuits and introduce ourselves. A few minutes of simple kindness to the ones that are struggling, would go a huge way to resolve some of our problems. Remember that some of these folk have NEVER had a fair deal in their lives.

Take an interest in your community, take part in your community even if it costs you a little bit of time and tiny bit of money...

Opps, I got on my soap box...

[Winston001]

Nothing is going to change as long as we as a society continue to accept what goes on, and do not take an active role in "interferring" in others lives.

These poor families have no idea what is normal, or how to change things when they have a small clue.

Your wise words need to be spread. Bling sent.

[unstuck]

Your wise words need to be spread. Bling sent.

Very wise words. There has been a couple of times when I have seen people being abusive/ bullying their kids and stepped in to see how they like being abused and bullied, with mixed results. I think in a couple of cases it may of made things worse for the kids, but it is so frustrating to see these kids being treated this way. I dont know what else to do though, sometimes I just feel like grabbing their kids and taking them home.

[Paul in NZ]

Fuckin arse biscuit.

This broke my bloody heart again even though the story had been in the press earlier.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/ar...ectid=10774563

Far out - I hope these kids get shown some love this christmas for a change.....

I dunno - this has got me thinking, you know there has to be something a diverse group of motorcyclists can do to help. Even if its taking one of these kids for a ride, fishing or rockin up with some pressies or shit. Anything to show them not all adults are a sack of shit.

Any ideas?

[SMOKEU]

There's an easy way to reduce the problem significantly in the long term. The government should start investing a lot more money on contraception (not just contraceptive pills, because people forget to take them). Then the government should not be paying people to breed, because there are people out there who have kids just so they can get more money from the government.

If a woman gets pregnant and can't afford to keep the baby, then the government should pay for the first child just like the current system. Any more kids after the first one, and the government should not be paying any extra dole payments.

This would reduce the incentive for people to breed, and therefore lead to fewer unwanted children. I personally knew a woman who was in her early 40s, and she kept on having kids because she didn't want to work. The kids themselves were being neglected, and eventually CYFS got involved and took the kids away for a few months before handing them back.

[blue rider]

there are a few ways to reduce unwanted pregnancy

1. No nonsense sexual education - name it, so that Men and Women old and young understand what is happening, why and what the consequences of unprotected sex are - biology is a bitch

2. Free Pill, Condoms and any other form of Contraception - yes condoms - even if people don't like to use them

3. Free Morning After Pill - for any female who asks for it, regardless of the age, without the need of parental notification

4. No more abstinence only education allowed - get the church out of Peoples bedrooms, really

5. no more interference by religion or religious believes. if women/men/couple refuses to have protected sex, because kids are "Gods Gift" than as Smokeu says, no support from the State.
Let their church pay for Gods Offspring

6. Free abortions, without any, ANY, moral hang ups. No questions asked, get checked by health practitioners if the women is healthy can support the procedure and does not want the child - have a free abortion

7. Free Tubal Ligation - regardless of the age of the women and the amount of children she may or may not have had at the time of request

8. Free Vasectomy - what you thought baby prevention is only a girl thingy?

9. Collection of Child Support enforced by the IRD -the national party would have lost the last election would it have campaigned on that one

if the state were to implement these, and the holy men/women that scream about "evil" abortions were told to shut up for good......then we would see a drop in unwanted pregnancies.

as long as we are being hypocrite about it with fake morals and societal standards, women (young and old) will have children that often they not want, or need, or can afford financially, mentally, emotionally.

Society needs to come to grips with the fact that live is not holy, that it has no value other than what we individually give it.
And sometimes the beast looks at us directly and states no value, just a human punching bag, or sex toy

so maybe we should give less importance to the fetus, and start concentrating on the living

[BoristheBiter]

there are a few ways to reduce unwanted pregnancy

1. No nonsense sexual education - name it, so that Men and Women old and young understand what is happening, why and what the consequences of unprotected sex are - biology is a bitch

2. Free Pill, Condoms and any other form of Contraception - yes condoms - even if people don't like to use them

3. Free Morning After Pill - for any female who asks for it, regardless of the age, without the need of parental notification

4. No more abstinence only education allowed - get the church out of Peoples bedrooms, really

5. no more interference by religion or religious believes. if women/men/couple refuses to have protected sex, because kids are "Gods Gift" than as Smokeu says, no support from the State.
Let their church pay for Gods Offspring

6. Free abortions, without any, ANY, moral hang ups. No questions asked, get checked by health practitioners if the women is healthy can support the procedure and does not want the child - have a free abortion

7. Free Tubal Ligation - regardless of the age of the women and the amount of children she may or may not have had at the time of request

8. Free Vasectomy - what you thought baby prevention is only a girl thingy?

9. Collection of Child Support enforced by the IRD -the national party would have lost the last election would it have campaigned on that one

if the state were to implement these, and the holy men/women that scream about "evil" abortions were told to shut up for good......then we would see a drop in unwanted pregnancies.

as long as we are being hypocrite about it with fake morals and societal standards, women (young and old) will have children that often they not want, or need, or can afford financially, mentally, emotionally.

Society needs to come to grips with the fact that live is not holy, that it has no value other than what we individually give it.
And sometimes the beast looks at us directly and states no value, just a human punching bag, or sex toy

so maybe we should give less importance to the fetus, and start concentrating on the living

And that will work.......yeah right.

All the education and free shit in the world won't stop the idiots breeding.
There is a reason they are called dumb and lazy.

[Winston001]

there are a few ways to reduce unwanted pregnancy

1. No nonsense sexual education - name it, so that Men and Women old and young understand what is happening, why and what the consequences of unprotected sex are - biology is a bitch

2. Free Pill, Condoms and any other form of Contraception - yes condoms - even if people don't like to use them

3. Free Morning After Pill - for any female who asks for it, regardless of the age, without the need of parental notification

4. No more abstinence only education allowed

5. no more interference by religion or religious believes.

6. Free abortions, without any, ANY, moral hang ups.

7. Free Tubal Ligation - regardless of the age of the women and the amount of children she may or may not have had at the time of request

8. Free Vasectomy - what you thought baby prevention is only a girl thingy?

9. Collection of Child Support enforced by the IRD -the national party would have lost the last election would it have campaigned on that one



so maybe we should give less importance to the fetus, and start concentrating on the living

Some of what you suggest already exists.

And I'm perplexed about the contrary logic of not teaching abstinence - because that is the most simple and effective anti-pregnancy device. So you want plenty of sex education (which I agree with) but nothing about avoiding sexual intercourse??

Forget religion, abstinence is rational decision making. None of my 18yr daughters friends are sexually active. Ok, that won't last but they certainly understand pregnancy because they have seen it happen to other girls.

Incidentally a foetus is a living human being. I support abortion but it does trouble me on an ethical level.

[SS90]

I have been following this case for a while ..... http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/crim...r-sent-to-jail

But check out this "Letter form the Mother", on an undisclosed date, requesting some compensation for the Daughter....

MOTHER'S LETTER TO JOHN KEY

My name is Ms X and I am writing this letter to you in regards to my daughter who is currently 8 years of Age and was Sexually Violated and Indecently Assaulted from her caregiver when she was approximately 4 and a half years old up to when she was returned to my care which was 3 years later.

This is very unfortunate that this ordeal has happened to my child but my main concern is that my daughter has some very disturbing issues due to her injury and there is no support from CYFS who were responsible for my child at the time of this incident.

I am very disturbed that my child had suffered this sort of treatment considering that CYFS said to me that they would protect my daughter better than myself, Yet I have 5 Children in total and none of them have ever ended up like this?

Because of the situation for you as New Zealand's Prime Minister I would like to know your views on my situation.
I hope I am not offending you in anyway, but I am very sad to see my daughter suffer from the trauma she has been through, which I hope you understand.

My daughter has been to the Evidential Video Unit and made a Video which I have not seen but have heard from the Detective and other sources which say that the Video that my Daughter has made is very detailed to the point that she knows things that no child should know at that age?

I have contacted CYFS in regards to Counselling for my child and they did pay for 12 Sessions for her and when I approached CYFS again for my daughter to return to Counselling CYFS had given me a letter to say that they were not prepared to pay for counselling as it is too expensive and there is not enough in the Budget.

Work and Income pay for her counselling now and I am disappointed that CYFS would treat my daughter this way.
I have contacted ACC in regards to making a claim for my daughter for these counselling fees for her to continue her counselling for a very long time as she has very sensitive issues around what has happened to her?

I currently have all 5 of my children in my custody at the moment and I am doing a great job looking after all my children too.

In your opinion Mr Keys do you think that my child is entitled to compensation for what happened to her for the past 3 years, because to be honest with you my daughter is going to be needing Constant Care and Protection as well as love and compassion from her loving siblings and myself of course. I have spoken and also looked up on the website in regards to compensation for my child for her the abuse she has suffered but ACC have made things clear that children are not Entitled to Lump Sum Compensation as She is too young. But please contact me as soon as you are available please. This Issue needs to be addressed as soon as possible.

My Family and I would like CYFS to sign my children off permanently and please let me and my family be together and try to give my daughter the support she needs.

I am very sorry Mr Keys But I have been seeking help everywhere for my child to get better and try to let go of the poison that is inside of her at the moment. I am sure you will agree with me about this problem because my child cannot even concentrate on School because all she thinks about is the abuse she has suffered and what effects this has on her when all she thinks about is doing silly things like what her caregiver done to her. So far the Police are doing an excellent job as the perpetrator has been in Court and we are awaiting the Jury date for the hearing.

Ms X

PS: If you have any Queries regarding anything you don't understand then please contact me.

[blue rider]

Some of what you suggest already exists.

And I'm perplexed about the contrary logic of not teaching abstinence - because that is the most simple and effective anti-pregnancy device. So you want plenty of sex education (which I agree with) but nothing about avoiding sexual intercourse??

Forget religion, abstinence is rational decision making. None of my 18yr daughters friends are sexually active. Ok, that won't last but they certainly understand pregnancy because they have seen it happen to other girls.

Incidentally a foetus is a living human being. I support abortion but it does trouble me on an ethical level.

_abstinence is a choice that one makes according to their needs/cultural background/upbringing etc. , no teaching required. don't want sex, don't have it.
but to say its the only safe method? Only until one has sex without protection.....boom a bun in the oven.



_a fetus is a living human being once born. Until this moment the women is already a living human being that might not be able to care for the future child. and her rights supersede that of the future human being.
and again, not everyone will choose abortion. I just want it to be accessible to all females that need one.

my points were not aimed at young people per se, they were merely a reflection on smokeu's musing on how to prevent people from "breeding".

all the options that I have listed are valid, none is to be discouraged. but I do insist that abstinence, especially based and founded on religious principle does not work, but will end only in slut shaming the girl, once she gets pregnant because she had gasp sex.

[blue rider]

as per the article

The mother wrote to Key asking for help and he passed that onto Bennett who replied and offered six counselling sessions for the girl.

wow - the generosity !!

Defence lawyer Lorraine Smith said there was no question the abuse was "ongoing" and "horrific".

But, Smith said the mother's actions were those of a woman let down by the system and multiple agencies.

no the action were those of a sadistic person

"My submission is that both the Prime Minister and the Minister for Social Development failed both [the child] and her mother.


nope they only failed the child

"She should not be punished excessively by the court because the system let her down."

she should be looked away and the keys should be thrown away

[Winston001]

Blaming any government for vile abuse of your own child is execrable.

[BoristheBiter]

_abstinence is a choice that one makes according to their needs/cultural background/upbringing etc. , no teaching required. don't want sex, don't have it.
but to say its the only safe method? Only until one has sex without protection.....boom a bun in the oven.


.

Abstinence is the only 100% safe method of contraception. It has noting to do with needs/cultural background/upbringing it has to do with respect for ones self.
Not only that it stops women getting cervical cancer.
All others have failed at some point.

All your education is all fine and dandy but the amount people are sleeping around these days is the problem.

[blue rider]

Abstinence is the only 100% safe method of contraception. It has noting to do with needs/cultural background/upbringing it has to do with respect for ones self.
Not only that it stops women getting cervical cancer.
All others have failed at some point.

All your education is all fine and dandy but the amount people are sleeping around these days is the problem.

so you told your girlfriend/partner that you giveth no pleasure before holy matrimony? or are you one of those that decide that only vaginal penetration is sex, and all the other stuff is fun?

and if married, you will only were a stylish capote to prevent transmitting the Human Papillamavirus HPV,(because it happens to married people too) and you of course will only go bold and naked if you want to re-produce....?

and when you have a girl child you will insist in abstinence instead of providing her with the vaccine that actually prevents the Virus, so she will stay virtuous?

And you consider this educated and smart and you live in the 21st century?

Education is the only way together with free and easily available options to prevent and or stop a pregnancy.