Not sure of what shock that is,but what your talking about is the rebound adjustment(too slow to return back up).Normally it is turned clockwise(in) to slow damping and anticlockwise(out) to speed it up.
Sounds to me like you've wound it in too far which is slowing the shocks rebound down too much,as a general basic setup I've always set the rebound to come up slightly slower than it'll go down when ya compress the back.
As for the height,is there a collar ontop of the shock spring?Either with a thread or with steps in it,moving the collar around with your C spanner to a lower step will put more preload on the spring and in turn increase the ride height.
All depends on the age of the shock and your weight(maybe the spring is too light).
Most good bike shops will be able to give ya advice and not charge you.
Just make a change to one thing at a time though,so you can feel what each adjustment does.
Its a black art the 'ole suspension,be careful testing and good luck

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