The weather's getting nasty. It'll get better soon, but then it'll get really shit and all the poseur sprotsbikers will run home and get their wheatie-bags and we won't hear from them for a while.
So how do we, the rest of us hairy-chested smart-wristed real man bikers cope with the impending cage-weather-season?
Please add your own suggestions (I know, I don't need to ask).
- Buy a scooter. No really! With the big silly screen like some of those Vespas. Complete weather protection, even better than a GSXR. You can keep riding in your suit and open-face that way.
- Cordura. Cordura is not always completely waterproof, but it's the best thing in changeable Auckland weather.
- Take the linings out of your cordura jacket and pants. `Why, I'll get cold!'. Wear a nice warm woollen cardigan underneath, then. The linings, when they get wet, make the jacket take far longer to dry making your life miserable the next day.
- Wear long football socks underneath your normal trousers, pull them right up to your knees. Nobody can see, but your legs will be toasty warm, and that's important because they're bearing a lot of wind and weather.
- If it's really dire, and your gloves just aren't cutting it, surgical gloves underneath do a lot for warmth. They're waterproof too, but so is your skin of course.
- Work our which way you need to wear your gloves -- jacket on top, or gloves on top? If you have low clip-on bars, jacket on top. Otherwise when you stop for the lights the cold rain water will run down inside your glubs. Gloves on top if you have high bars.
- I'm told heated grips are marvellous things. Alternatively, a number of adventure-riders tell me that those ugly hand-guard things are reasonably effective at blocking the wind and rain.
- Boots are very important, they are responsible for a massive improvement in comfort. Make sure to put your cordura trou over the top of the boot; otherwise you'll have cold rainwater running down inside your boots when you stop.
- Oil/wax the boots. They might leak. If it's lunatic weather and you're going to be riding for a few hours, put plastic bags over your boots. And bread-bags on your hands.
- Scarf. Scarf is epic win. You can wear it around your neck like normal, or when it gets really cold you can wrap it around your lower face and chin as well. Plus it'll come in handy looking cool and picking up chicks when you change out of your gear.
- Stand up every once in a while to get rid of that crotch-pool of water that collects around your nads. It'll eventually seep through and you'll look like you pissed yourself (but it'll be very cold).
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