Sex - or no sex?

[Laava]

Back to the original topic-kind of. I lived with a girlfriend for 2.5yrs in London during which time she became less interested in sex all the time, using different excuses all the time to the point where I wanted out of the relationship. Because of the circumstances, I decided to let her dump me, that way we would have both felt better about the parting.[True story, it turned out that way too!] Anyhow, I decided to withhold sexual "favours" to get the ball rolling. Or not, as the case may be! It took 3 months before she asked me to make love to her that night. I told her that I didn't feel like it and went downstairs to watch telly. I had no idea how devastated she would be and the subsequent conversation was a tearjerker for her that's for sure! I said to her;"Now you know how I feel when you consistently withhold" or words to that effect. Needless to say, I got dumped as I wanted all along and was happily single again. Absolute believer in the Try before you buy, and have to say that sex without love is very forgettable, often regrettable.

[Mom]

And if it is to be my last I sure ain't going to be thinking of sex.....not wasting my breath on something unfullfilling....

Sad comment there GB. Great sex is very fulfilling indeed

Try before you buy, and have to say that sex without love is very forgettable, often regrettable.

What about LUST ......geeze you blokes are so oldfashioned

[Laava]

...What about LUST ......geeze you blokes are so oldfashioned

Ha ha! Should I say that LUST while in love is even better! Plus you don't wake up in the morning looking for excuses to leg it!

[jrandom]

Because of the circumstances, I decided to let her dump me, that way we would have both felt better about the parting.

WTF is up with that?

I told her that I didn't feel like it and went downstairs to watch telly. I had no idea how devastated she would be and the subsequent conversation was a tearjerker for her that's for sure! I said to her;"Now you know how I feel when you consistently withhold" or words to that effect. Needless to say, I got dumped as I wanted all along...

Again. WTF? How hard is it to man up and say "Sorry, sugar, this relationship isn't working for me. We best split up and move on. Toodle pip."?

Seriously, why did you feel that you had to fuck around with all those mind-game bollocks?

[Naki Rat]

GOOD Grief! This is a situation off television not real life (Or is it? - is it real to you?) but it did get me thinking - I know what I would do in response to the situation, but then we are all different so I wondered how would other chicks would handle it

My misinterpretation of your (imagined?!) problem.

Mind you if you're not only watching Shortland Street but also then researching the half baked relationship problems portrayed in it :slap: perhaps seeking professional advice wasn't too far off the mark

[Laava]

[QUOTE=Seriously, why did you feel that you had to fuck around with all those mind-game bollocks?[/QUOTE]
I admit it sounds like mind games but to be honest I am not into that shit. Simply as I can put it, it was the 3rd time we had been together and I had been unfaithfull to her as well. So it actually was for the best. Always very hard to read into others relationships isn't it? I did try to talk to her about things but she didn't want to hear what I was saying. We are still on talking terms so like I say, it was for the best.

[Grahameeboy]

Sad comment there GB. Great sex is very fulfilling indeed



What about LUST ......geeze you blokes are so oldfashioned

Nah not sad.....life is fulfilling for me Mom....

[SixPackBack]

I admit it sounds like mind games but to be honest I am not into that shit. Simply as I can put it, it was the 3rd time we had been together and I had been unfaithfull to her as well. So it actually was for the best. Always very hard to read into others relationships isn't it? I did try to talk to her about things but she didn't want to hear what I was saying. We are still on talking terms so like I say, it was for the best.

Laaava......."he's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy"!

[Her_C4]

My misinterpretation of your (imagined?!) problem.

Mind you if you're not only watching Shortland Street but also then researching the half baked relationship problems portrayed in it :slap: perhaps seeking professional advice wasn't too far off the mark

Ha ha ha - bling for you sir, that was a great comeback - I will turn off the TV and discuss the matter with my counsellor

[Bikernereid]

I am 34 and my mother is nearly 58.

As a side issue - you must be bloody young.

Or is your mother waaay past 50?????

[Bikernereid]

I reckon.

Anyway, a legal divorce only requires two years of living apart followed by a $175 fee and a visit to the Family Court. If a marriage quickly turns out to be that fundamentally fucked up, I'd say that simply chucking it in would be a sad but wise step to take.

IMHO, one spouse completely failing, without good reason, to fulfill the other's sexual needs constitutes a breaking of the promises made and a valid reason for separation.

As for the not trying before you buy there are still some God squad out there who do not advocate sex before marriage and some other behaviours too. Believe me I have 3 cousins who have been brought up 'knowing'/ being indoctrinated that sex before marriage is wrong/ a sin and as far as I know my poor uncle didn't get any before marrying his fruit loop bible bashing wife.

All I can say is I hope that the poor lads are happy waiting to get some once married and that thier partners are of the same ilk so that noone is disappointed!!

[doc]

I am 34 and my mother is nearly 58.

mmmm yor avatar is not the devil shagging a sheep is it ? If is do you have her name ? She is very attractive.

[scumdog]

This is your life. It isn't a dress rehearsal for something else. Enjoy everyday to the fullest for it may be your last. How do you want to live it?

That's why I have the above as my sig.

[fredie]

what about a strap on . jigy jigy

[GurlRacer]

Interesting topic.

I guess it depends on who you meet in life. From what I hear, sex complicates everything.

I'm a strong believer in what happens, happens.
Everything happens for a reason. There is no right or wrong answer here, all down to personal preference. Ex-boyfriends have tried to pressure me in to having sex, but I do what I wanna do and so, I haven't. It'll happen eventually (I hope )