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Thread: Fancy Dress Party

  1. #1
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    15th October 2005 - 17:42
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    Fancy Dress Party

    A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a fancy dress party.
    He doesn't know what to wear to hide his head and his wooden leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his problem.

    A few days later he receives a parcel with a note:

    "Dear Sir, Please find enclosed a pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief will
    cover your bald head and with your wooden leg you will be just right as a
    pirate."

    The man thinks this is terrible because they have just emphasized his wooden
    leg, so he writes a letter of complaint.

    A week passes and he received another parcel and note:

    "Dear Sir, Sorry about the previous parcel. Please find enclosed a monk's habit. The long robe will cover your wooden leg and with your bald head you will really look the part".

    The man is really furious now, because the company has gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to drawing attention to his bald head.

    Sooo he writes a really rude letter of complaint. A few days later he gets a very small parcel from the company with the accompanying letter:

    "Dear Sir,Please find enclosed a tin of Golden Syrup. Pour the tin of Golden Syrup over your bald head, stick your wooden leg up your arse and go as a f*cking toffee apple"

  2. #2
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    11th October 2004 - 15:01
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    hahahaha ahgahaha hahhahahaha hahahahahaha hahashahahahaha










    hahahaha ahhahahahahah ahahahahah ah ahahahahaha ahahahahahaha

    nice one

  3. #3
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    9th February 2005 - 13:27
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    lol very good
    I'm not a complete idiot... some pieces are missing

    Quote Originally Posted by DingDong
    "Hi... I rang about the cats you have for sale..."..... "oh... you have children.... how much for the children?"

    mucho papoosa bueno no panocha

  4. #4
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    21st July 2005 - 12:00
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    sounds like the same pack of dickheads i dealt with...


    they sent me a sheepskin and a baseball bat and told me to go as a FUCKING CYCLOPS!!!
    Life is tough. It's tougher when you're stupid

    SARGE
    represented by GCM

  5. #5
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    18th December 2004 - 08:09
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    Quote Originally Posted by SARGE View Post
    sounds like the same pack of dickheads i dealt with...


    they sent me a sheepskin and a baseball bat and told me to go as a FUCKING CYCLOPS!!!
    And???...... Sounds like a perfectly reasonable suggestion to me. Ugly as sin, mean tempered, big stick to hit people with.
    Oh wait, you're supposed to be in some kind of disguise right?? lol

    "If you can't laugh at yourself, you're just not paying attention!"
    "There is no limit to dumb."

    "Resolve to live with all your might while you do live, and as you shall wish you had done ten thousand years hence."

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Macktheknife View Post
    And???...... Sounds like a perfectly reasonable suggestion to me. Ugly as sin, mean tempered, big stick to hit people with.
    Oh wait, you're supposed to be in some kind of disguise right?? lol
    you dont have many mirrors round your place huh?
    Life is tough. It's tougher when you're stupid

    SARGE
    represented by GCM

  7. #7
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    18th December 2004 - 08:09
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    eek

    Quote Originally Posted by SARGE View Post
    you dont have many mirrors round your place huh?
    I'm not allowed mirrors anymore, the doctors took them all away, even the plastic ones. I still get asked to parties tho, usually around end of October, I'm not sure why.
    But I still get regular visits from my girlfriend, every week on tuesdays between 10.00am and 10.50am, she brings me presents and makes me eat them. She never shows any affection tho, apparently thats not allowed.
    *sigh*
    The music is nice too, drowns out the voices.

    "If you can't laugh at yourself, you're just not paying attention!"
    "There is no limit to dumb."

    "Resolve to live with all your might while you do live, and as you shall wish you had done ten thousand years hence."

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