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Thread: Our jobs are safe...

  1. #1
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    Our jobs are safe...

    OUR JOBS ARE SAFE AS LONG AS THESE PEOPLE ARE OUT THERE......

    ONE

    Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets.

    I asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter.

    "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?"

    "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.

    TWO

    I was checking out at the local Target with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider" looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today." She said, "OK," and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.

    THREE

    A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."

    FOUR

    I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car "Do You need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery in this remote. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."

    FIVE

    Several years ago, we had a junior typist who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?"

    "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the junior took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

    SIX

    My neighbour works in the I.T. department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branches who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"

    SEVEN

    Police in Dubbo NSW interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopier machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.

    Life is tough... it's tougher if you're stupid.
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  2. #2
    Well,off the internet I guess,can we trust how truthfull they are?

    But when we go to the supermarket checkout the girl holds up a cabbage and says ''what's this?''.True,and the same with silverbeet and other foods they've never actualy seen outside of a hamburger....sad.
    In and out of jobs, running free
    Waging war with society

  3. #3
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    And to make matters worse....they are the future....
    In space, no one can smell your fart.

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    Quote Originally Posted by McJim View Post
    And to make matters worse....they are the future....
    No no... I am the future, so you'd better start worshipping me now.

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beemer View Post
    Police in Dubbo NSW interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopier machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.
    This one is true except it was in the US. I remember seeing it on one of those Police Videos. What a dumbass.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Motu View Post
    But when we go to the supermarket checkout the girl holds up a cabbage and says ''what's this?''. True,and the same with silverbeet and other foods they've never actualy seen outside of a hamburger... sad.
    I had one pick up some yams and say "what are these, do you eat them?" But the act that creeps me out the most is them picking up the sachets of fabric conditioner and sniffing it "mmn, this smells lovely!" - do you mind, I have to touch that to open it!

    Heard one young girl say to a woman last week as she picked up her English Woman's Weekly "is this a woman's weekly from England? I've never seen one before!"
    Yes, I am pedantic about spelling and grammar so get used to it!

  7. #7
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    I've had a young computer sales person get angry at me and tell me that "there's no such thing as an internal ADSL modem". I ordered a D-Link DSL-100D internal ASDSL modem. He tought it was an ISDN card!

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    oh it get better lets buy this house ,,,oh its fallen down..down worry we will get the money back clic

    Its on a frigg#%^&^n cliff ..what do you expect dumbarse who is the mpre stupid ...thge eqc or the person who bought it

    oh should this been in the thief get 60 000 thread ?

    Stephen
    "Look, Madame, where we live, look how we live ... look at the life we have...The Republic has forgotten us."

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hillbilly View Post
    I've had a young computer sales person get angry at me and tell me that "there's no such thing as an internal ADSL modem". I ordered a D-Link DSL-100D internal ASDSL modem. He tought it was an ISDN card!
    That's because it's modified ISDN equipment and actually identifies itself as being an ISDN modem in the driver properties.
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Click image for larger version. 

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