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Thread: Joe buys a Harley

  1. #1
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    Joe buys a Harley

    Joe wanted to buy a motorbike. He doesn't have much luck, until, one day, he comes across a Harley with a for sale sign on it. The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It is shiny and in absolutely mint condition.

    He immediately buys it, and asks the seller how he kept it in such great condition for 10 years. "Well, it's quite simple, really," says the seller, "whenever the bike is outside and it's going to rain, rub Vaseline on the chrome. It protects it from the rain." And he hands Joe a jar of Vaseline.

    That night, his girlfriend, Sandra, invites him over to meet her parents. Naturally, they take the bike there. But just before they enter the house, Sandra stops him and says, "I have to tell you something about my family before we go in. When we eat dinner, we don't talk. In fact, the first person who says anything during dinner has to do the dishes." "No problem," he says.

    And in they go. Joe is shocked. Right smack in the middle of the living room is a huge stack of dirty dishes. In the kitchen is another huge stack of dishes. Piled up on the stairs, in the corridor, everywhere he looks, dirty dishes.

    They sit down to dinner and, sure enough, no one says a word. As dinner progresses, Joe decides to take advantage of the situation. So he leans over and kisses Sandra. No one says a word. So he reaches over and fondles her breasts. Still, nobody says a word. So he stands up, grabs her, rips her clothes off, throws her on the table, and has his wicked way with her right there, in front of her parents. His girlfriend is a little flustered, her dad is obviously livid, and her mum horrified when he sits back down, but no one says a word.

    He looks at her mum. "She's got a great body", he thinks. So he grabs the mum, bends her over the dinner table, and has his way with her every which way right there on the dinner table. Now his girlfriend is furious and her dad is boiling, but still, total silence. All of a sudden there is a loud clap of thunder, and it starts to rain.

    Joe remembers his bike, so he pulls the jar of Vaseline from his pocket.

    Suddenly the father backs away from the table and shouts:
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    .
    "Alright, enough - I'll do the f***ing dishes!"

    Ohlins Steering Damper - Shogun Fairing Protectors - Wheel Stripes

  2. #2
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    Very good (Not a repost :slap
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sniper View Post
    Very good (Not a repost :slap
    I am unsure if you have sarcasm attached to that last statement.....

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by sAsLEX View Post
    I am unsure if you have sarcasm attached to that last statement.....
    I dont, I initaially wrote that it was a repost until I searched for a link and realised I had read it elsewhere.
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  5. #5
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    Sniper - you're sacked!!!!

    The above joke was posted here on 14 July 2005.
    ACC - It's where the Enron accountants all went.

  6. #6
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    What? no, not you What? I mean What!
    I checked to see if it was posted and I didn't see it, Sniper also missed it!!!
    Whats the fascination with finding reposts, too much time on your hands?
    If this was posted 14 July 2005, the new members since then have the pleasure of reading a funny motorcycle related joke. I doubt new members look at all the old posts, I sure as hell can't be feeked. I have trouble keeping up with all the current threads.
    Thats my 2 cents anyhow.

    Ohlins Steering Damper - Shogun Fairing Protectors - Wheel Stripes

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by What? View Post
    The above joke was posted here on 14 July 2005.
    I searched for a link and couldnt find it, unless the joke misspelt vaseline, in which case, its nulled.

    The QRF has spoken

    Whats the fascination with finding reposts, too much time on your hands?
    If this was posted 14 July 2005, the new members since then have the pleasure of reading a funny motorcycle related joke. I doubt new members look at all the old posts, I sure as hell can't be feeked. I have trouble keeping up with all the current threads.
    It is what we do
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sniper View Post
    It is what we do
    Whatever floats your boat I guess.
    What does QRF stand for?

    Ohlins Steering Damper - Shogun Fairing Protectors - Wheel Stripes

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by ninjac View Post
    What does QRF stand for?
    Meant to be Quick Repost Farce. Others have varying descriptions
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sniper View Post
    Meant to be Quick Repost Farce. Others have varying descriptions

    G.O.I. works for me.

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by Big Dave View Post
    G.O.I. works for me.
    Gulf of Infertility?
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by ninjac View Post
    Whats the fascination with finding reposts, too much time on your hands?
    I personally couldn't give a toss about reposts.

    But this one was special... out-sniping Sniper ain't an everyday thing, y'know
    ACC - It's where the Enron accountants all went.

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sniper View Post
    I searched for a link and couldnt find it, unless the joke misspelt vaseline, in which case, its nulled.
    Nope......................
    ACC - It's where the Enron accountants all went.

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by What? View Post
    But this one was special... out-sniping Sniper ain't an everyday thing, y'know
    Dammit. Well done for finding it though.
    To every man upon this earth
    Death cometh sooner or late
    And how can a man die better
    Than facing fearful odds
    For the ashes of his fathers
    And the temples of his Gods

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