Shut CYF down

[Usarka]

It's the first place child predators hang out and if one sees this as a habitual thing where the parent does this on a regular basis it does not take a rocket scientist to know what is likely to happen should a child molester be on the lookout.

Got any stats on that?

I've heard many reports that there are no more child molesterers (sp?) hanging around parks than there were 30 years ago when most of todays parents quite happily played as kids.

[James Deuce]

I can't help but wonder what would have been the response if something 'untoward' happened to the kids.

Any parent who leaves children unsupervised in a park needs a good bollicking.

It's the first place child predators hang out and if one sees this as a habitual thing where the parent does this on a regular basis it does not take a rocket scientist to know what is likely to happen should a child molester be on the lookout.

Totally apocryphal. That stats support the argument that child molesters are usually known to the children and that they are usually within a fairly close family circle. The dude in the raincoat or car offering lollies is bogey man, more often than not.

Really committed child predators who aren't related to the family will go to huge lengths to befriend a family and gain their trust, before unleashing their hideous crimes.

[Skyryder]

Got any stats on that?

I've heard many reports that there are no more child molesterers (sp?) hanging around parks than there were 30 years ago when most of todays parents quite happily played as kids.

Nope but I know a couple of local plods and they get the odd call from Joe public on unsavoury charactors hanging around parks. Not a lot but it does happen.

The other equation that this parent allowed his nine year old son to look after his four year old daughter. What sort of impact do you think that would have on a child if something happened to his sister?

Call it what you will but I call placing a nine year old with the responsibilty of looking after a four year old in public place or for that matter even in the family home bad parenting. If you think otherwise your choice.

Skyryder

[PirateJafa]

Hell, when I was nine me'n a mate were spending the weekends skiing through the woods outside Moscow - which WERE known to have dangerous wildlife in. Or wandering the massive outdoor markets by ourselves, buying cheap BB guns to shoot each other with.

Learnt to drive when I was ten, in a clapped out Lada. Then learnt to drive in a Niva when the first Lada carked it.

CYFS would have had a fit - and yet look at what a well-rounded individual I turned out to be. Oh wait...

I lived my childhood like Calvin and Hobbes - what a great way to grow up it was too.

[ynot slow]

Hell how many parents can keep up with their kids in a park nowadays,we used to enjoy mum taking us and neighbours kids to the park,but we all took off to play lol,not only the swings etc but hide and seek in gardens.

So cyfs will be at all schools this Monday to get parents who let their kids walk to school alone,we lived about 300mt from the kids primary school,they didn't have to cross the road just walk 100mt and turn corner then onto school,sometimes they walked alone others their mum walked part way,we called it growing up and as they grew older responsibility and freedom increased for them,also quite often at least 3 mums would keep eyes out for those walking alone.

What ever happened to the thing called freedom,i.e grab the bike and ride to friends places,maybe kick the crap out of rugby balls,play bullrush after school,go to soccer practice after school all on our own.

[thehovel]

I can remember having to be home when the street lights came on. Also once my 12yr old brother push biked around the mountain (Taranaki) and skited about it all week,SO next Saturday me and 3 mates thought what a good idea (7yr olds on half sized bikes). We packed lunch and a water bottle each and off we went from Stratford toward New Plymouth (OH we forgot to tell anyone what we were up to). It was summer we refilled out water bottles at each stream as we progressed around ,turned left at New Plymouth and by the time we were nearing Opunake the sun was setting SO we rocked up at my Aunty Molly's. “Aunty Molly we are riding around the mountain it is getting late so can we stay the night and ride on tomorrow?” Unbeknown to us the police had been motived because one of my mates was supposed to go out that day. Aunty Molly makes a few phone calls, parents told, and we were feed ,stayed the night and continued next day with a big breakfast. By the time we got to Mahoe people was appearing at the side of the road waving to us. I later found out the bush telegraph was working overtime. At Cardiff there was quite a lot of spectators ,we felt important . On arriving at Stratford we where meet by the cops and escorted home and a huge lecture on telling parents if we left town!!!!!
A foot note both my kids told mom that 1 week was enough escorting to school or they would be called a sissy. Also I don't trust Welfare __ CYfS or what they are going to be called in the future because they except any responsibility for decisions made in the past. (you have to live with the outcome) Regards Richard

[Owl]

Nope but I know a couple of local plods and they get the odd call from Joe public on unsavoury charactors hanging around parks. Not a lot but it does happen.

The other equation that this parent allowed his nine year old son to look after his four year old daughter. What sort of impact do you think that would have on a child if something happened to his sister?

Call it what you will but I call placing a nine year old with the responsibilty of looking after a four year old in public place or for that matter even in the family home bad parenting. If you think otherwise your choice.

Skyryder

I guess a 3 year old taking an 18 month old to the park via trike would be out of the question then?

[Skyryder]

Totally apocryphal. That stats support the argument that child molesters are usually known to the children and that they are usually within a fairly close family circle. The dude in the raincoat or car offering lollies is bogey man, more often than not.

Really committed child predators who aren't related to the family will go to huge lengths to befriend a family and gain their trust, before unleashing their hideous crimes.

The bottom line on this is that good parents do not allow nine year olds to supervise four year old girls in a park.

I can only conclude that you see this as an 'acceptable' risk. I do not. And it matters not one whit what the stats suggest.

You get one chance with your kids. Fail in any way and will not get a second.

That was my mantra when my kids you at an age where they were not capable of understanding the dangers of society, be it predators in a park, a bully, traffic, water or waves from the sea. You keep a constant eye out for danger.

And you do not and I repeat do not place the supervision of a four year old girl in the hands of her nine year old brother for any reason whatsoever.


Skyryder

[Indiana_Jones]

What a crock of shit.

If that's the best CYF can do.....

-Indy

[Skyryder]

I guess a 3 year old taking an 18 month old to the park via trike would be out of the question then?

Only without a helmut.

Skyryder

[Winter]

Quick..... Burn Them!

Cyfs that is..

NZ parents need to take a big lesson in 'HTFU'.

If four year old fell and broke her arm, big bro would have learnt to be more careful, 4yo would have learnt not to trust boys, and they both would have been better off for it.

I'm glad my parents bet the shit out of me with a wooden spoon or a belt whenever I did something bad.. I didn't grow up wanting to hurt people, but I did grow up with a good sense of right and wrong.

[Forest]

From reading the article, CYF made a brief investigation but took no further action.

In case that wasn't clear they took no further action.

I don't see what the problem is.

[Ocean1]

In our case I don't think any of us neighbours would ever have thought of calling CYFS because we knew the kids were generally looked after.

And there you have it, the kids and mother were part of your village. You knew the situation and not only accepted it but, if need be would likely have provided a band-aid, a jacket, a hot dinner or a ride home.

I remember occasionally dispatching my two, aged about 12 and 10, off to the park at the end of our street with sausages, sauce and bread, (there's a public barbie there). You sometimes need to depend on your village, and that's not the sort of help CYFS can provide.

I don't honestly believe anyone needs the sort of help CYFS provide, the sad fact is that sort of help never changes anyones behaviour. Nothing does, an individual is either safe with kids or not, and nothing anyone says or does short of a 12swg prefrontal labotomy will ever change them.

[Winston001]

From reading the article, CYF made a brief investigation but took no further action.

In case that wasn't clear they took no further action.

I don't see what the problem is.

Agreed. Two pages of angry posts condemning CYFs for properly checking the children were safe. A bit humiliating for the parents maybe but so what? Its a consequence of living in a society where we can afford an agency which looks out for the welfare of kids.

[Winston001]

On a personal level I have sympathy for these parents. I also think we wrap our children up too much to protect them. Google Lenore Skenazy and Free Range Kids - she's opened this whole topic up.

But...but...you only get one chance. What if you get it wrong? Could have saved/protected your child and didn't? Telling yourself and everyone else afterwards about your personal philosophy isn't going to be much help down the years ahead.