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Thread: Ever stayed calm while crapping yourself?

  1. #16
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    30th December 2002 - 11:00
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    Quote Originally Posted by dinosaur View Post
    Helmet on and switch into catch up mode so I don't get too far behind and seem like a soft cock
    Only a soft cock would have done what you did A real biker would have been so zoned in on riding he wouldn't have even noticed the bee or the stinging until the ride was over
    Legalise anarchy

  2. #17
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    13th May 2012 - 10:37
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    Quote Originally Posted by sinfull View Post
    Even at 50 k , you can calmly open your visor and turn ya head 90 degrees and it will get sucked out !
    That reminds me of Pierce “Quiff” Brosnan, pouting, calmly dispatching 50 bad guys with a bazooka, drinking a Martini, snogging 3 birds, while surfing a tsunami, in a tuxedo.

    I can say from experience, of the 100 things that popped into my brain, opening the visor was not one of them. I didn’t want to disturb the little f**ker one bit. I was only doing about 30kms. Going uphill. With a wasp in my helmet. All the time remembering how bloody painful wasp stings are to the face and my last “off” on the bike.
    "This is not a car."

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by gnjackal View Post
    That reminds me of Pierce “Quiff” Brosnan, pouting, calmly dispatching 50 bad guys with a bazooka, drinking a Martini, snogging 3 birds, while surfing a tsunami, in a tuxedo.

    I can say from experience, of the 100 things that popped into my brain, opening the visor was not one of them. I didn’t want to disturb the little f**ker one bit. I was only doing about 30kms. Going uphill. With a wasp in my helmet. All the time remembering how bloody painful wasp stings are to the face and my last “off” on the bike.
    It's like most situations you don't really want to be in ! You give the ONE who's most likely gonna hurt ya an out and they'll 90% of the time, take it anyway !
    A girlfriend once asked " Why is it you seem to prefer to race, than spend time with me ?"
    The answer was simple ! "I'll prolly get bored with racing too, once i've nailed it !"

    Bowls can wait !

  4. #19
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    Riding up the wainui hill, wasp flies in my open visor. Does an appreciable impression of a sewing machine across my face. Managed to get to the top and pull over before having a little freak out.
    "It is by will alone I set my mind in motion"



  5. #20
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    13th May 2012 - 10:37
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    Quote Originally Posted by Karl08 View Post
    How's the helmet, after it's wee journey?
    It landed on a bush, got a few scratches, but otherwise didn't take much of a hit. Still wearing it...
    "This is not a car."

  6. #21
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    Was happily hooning down the road the other day when some big ass bug smashed right into my eye and it might have stung my bottom eyelid - hurt like hell and I very hastily (and haphazardly) jammed on my brakes and frantically went about trying get bits of bug out of my eye. Rode to my destination with one eye (not good for the depth perception) and by the time I got there my bung eye had puffed up quite impressively. Don't know what it was, but the goop it left on my face smelt like lemons.

  7. #22
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    3rd January 2013 - 19:46
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    Argh, I know how you feel. Last Sunday, just coming from HD I was coming down the Waikato Expressway at about 100k, suddenly there is a wasp or bee inside my visor. Was trying hard not to panic. Problem there is that it is not exactly a safe road to stop (might even be illegal, but what do I know, we don't have big roads in Taupo ) So I had to wait for the next exit while trying hard not to go cross-eyed too much as (thankfully) the stupid critter clings to the inside of my visor directly in front of my eyes and stays there. A bit distracting but we made it to a stop safely. Well safe for me, the critter might not have been that lucky.

  8. #23
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    Opening the visor is all I've needed to do to get rid of all the various insects that can find their way inside a helmet.

  9. #24
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    Same thing happened to me on the way back from Taranaki, freaked me out initially but the visor thing worked for me too, once I managed to get them both open. Just glad I was on a straight stretch of road at the time. Was too big to be a stingy insect though - maybe a blowfly?

  10. #25
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    7th February 2010 - 19:27
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    I have had wasps/bees in my helmet more times that I can remember. Normally flipping the visor up will suck them out.

    Quote Originally Posted by bluninja View Post
    Only a soft cock would have done what you did A real biker would have been so zoned in on riding he wouldn't have even noticed the bee or the stinging until the ride was over
    I got stung on SH16 on my arm, and it was 5 minutes before I could safely pull over to remove the sting. By this time, my arm was going numb, with sharp stabbing pains as well! Took 2 weeks for the bruise that covered my forearm to go. I still have the scar from where the stinger was embedded in my arm. I don't know how a bee got up my sleeve through the tiny gap.

  11. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by hellokitty View Post
    I got stung on SH16 on my arm, and it was 5 minutes before I could safely pull over to remove the sting. By this time, my arm was going numb, with sharp stabbing pains as well! Took 2 weeks for the bruise that covered my forearm to go. I still have the scar from where the stinger was embedded in my arm. I don't know how a bee got up my sleeve through the tiny gap.
    You're lucky it didn't crawl any further then .
    Legalise anarchy

  12. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by gnjackal View Post
    Ok, so I turn off of the road from Mt Vic tunnel in Wellington and head up the hill towards Newtown. Just before the roundabout I hear something in my helmet. I look down at my visor.... WASP!!! IN! MY! HELMET! As a child, a friend and I were each stung 10 times by an angry wasp, so my atavistic fear is in overdrive. Note, when you're riding a motorcycle and a wasp is in your helmet, it's important not to panic.

    I pulled onto the footpath - added complication, I'm on a steep gradient, so have to sort the bike out first. About 100 things went through my head, I sorted the bike, undid the helmet clip and took my helmet off so fast I threw it about 10 feet
    Hahaha been there, done that. I'm shiz scared of wasps.
    Lil bugger got in my helmet, felt all the blood drain from my face.
    The bus driver wasnt as impressed about my emergency stop near the bus stop.

  13. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by fyrgem View Post
    Hahaha been there, done that. I'm shiz scared of wasps.
    Lil bugger got in my helmet, felt all the blood drain from my face.
    The bus driver wasnt as impressed about my emergency stop near the bus stop.
    I'm not certain but pretty sure "angry insects in your helmet" isn't in any of the glossy brochures...
    "This is not a car."

  14. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by gnjackal View Post
    I'm not certain but pretty sure "angry insects in your helmet" isn't in any of the glossy brochures...
    I think most could name a few things they left out of the brochure, like tank slap, wet paint and those in cages not even looking for us. But hey, the pros outweigh the cons, in the overall picture otherwise we wouldn't be doing it

  15. #30
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    Staying calm while crapping yourself? Its called shock!

    Our mailbox is a very nice wooden affair made from leftover bits of the house so its all matchy matchy. Every spring the local birds all think - "sweet - nesting box!" and all the mail gets covered in bits of potential nest... Its a real PIA and leaves a bit of detrius laying about... Later - the local Weta population all seem to think - "Sweet - LOVE SHACK" and move in...

    If one is in the habit of heading off to the gym and collecting the mail on the way out the drive - one can get quite a nasty surprise when the stack of flyers from The Warehouse and Mitre 10 plus bills etc also contain copulating Wetas... (at least thats what I think they are doing). Especially when you are wearing a singlet and shorts and it drops in your lap and you have a seat belt on....

    Fucking things seem to have a sense of humour at any rate

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