A French letter

**martybabe** · 27th November 2007, 17:04

So I'm cruising through France on an XS750 with me buds and the bride and were all gettin kinda weary and hunngy,so we stop at the only village for miles,a place called Maniac Blanc,a one horse 3 buildings kinda place.

ffwd to reception at the only guesthouse in town.Got any rooms lady?"oui",across the court yard,over the stink drain,up the stairs,down the corridor thru the shared bathroom and it's second closset on the left.Dump the gear and two hours later I've found reception again. Ave vous any where to park the bikes? "NON!",ok ave vous any food?"NON!" how about a beer and some chippies?"NON!" Le bar cest ferme (closed),le kitchen cest ferme, NON NON NON!

.Any where in town then sweetness? NON! le village CEST FERME!

.Remember the village name? fookin found her aint I, the blanc maniac.Breakfast 7.30-7.32 a.m. eenglish man!Baguette avec snails.

Yum put me down fer that fecker.
Hour and a half later I've found the broom cupboard we're stoppin in,"No feckin food no feckin booze and no fekin parkin boys and girls" apparently it's national feck you day in homo paris or somat!."I've got this powdered ham and pea soup" says the bride.How the hell do you powder ham? so 4 of us share one packet of green and pink wet sawdust,go nighty night and miss brecky in the mornin.

I'd love to say I shoved the french witch's head down the stink drain but sadly it would be untrue.
The rest of the holiday? went to nudist village,saw old people doin naked yoga,legs akimbo

,fried me c.d.i.,had a puncture, rode bike naked legally on the road,nearly lost it on some mountain pass and went home,avoiding bloody maniac blanc,population 1 witch,1 donkey and a sore ass,all related.
Don't go to france bro's,the're mad as poms.

Happy holliday memories,I might have some one day. x

**paturoa** · 27th November 2007, 17:08

all holiday stories require the friends to be bored shiteless by the photos - so where are they?

**martybabe** · 27th November 2007, 17:11

Originally Posted by paturoa

all holiday stories require the friends to be bored shiteless by the photos - so where are they?

No camera dude,no room' pockets full of pea soup.

Oh you wana see the wrinklies doin naked yoga.... best left to the imagination mate. euch!

**paturoa** · 27th November 2007, 17:13

That good, I was having second thoughts about the photos of "legally naked riding"

**deanohit** · 27th November 2007, 17:35

Bwahahaha, sound like ya's had fun then!

**pritch** · 27th November 2007, 19:55

LOL Sorry, gotta share the love...

**martybabe** · 27th November 2007, 20:20

Originally Posted by pritch008

LOL Sorry, gotta share the love...

Hey pritch,were you on your profile bike on sunday?I'm sure I saw that thing rattle and hum atop one o them hills, recognise the exhaust pannier bracket combo?

**martybabe** · 27th November 2007, 20:27

P.s. please say you were or you'll make me look like a blind man on non observent sunday,in a heavy fog with his eyes closed and sunnies. quite accurate really!

just tryin to fill this thread up,loads a readers but no one wants to say hello today

**jrandom** · 27th November 2007, 20:46

I'm all about saying hello dude, that story put a grin on my face that I needed real bad.

Bling coming your way! [Edit: Fucking 24-hour limitation... have to hang on a bit then...]

**gijoe1313** · 28th November 2007, 08:30

So... you went abroad then?

**martybabe** · 28th November 2007, 09:27

Originally Posted by gijoe1313

So... you went abroad then?

oui

**Blue Velvet** · 28th November 2007, 09:38

Originally Posted by jrandom

I'm all about saying hello dude, that story put a grin on my face that I needed real bad.

Bling coming your way! [Edit: Fucking 24-hour limitation... have to hang on a bit then...]

+1 and +1

I've already blinged you too much today MB, I enjoy reading your posts

(Edit: LOL @ green and pink wet sawdust)