Dangerous thoughts today

**madmatt** · 3rd December 2006, 17:42

I have been out all day, started with a few of us at a local service station and headed out to mba for a meal, found out sad news while there...
It just pisses me off that the good guys go first.
somedays like today I almost start wishing for it, I guess this is my situation and life, I dont want to rant about shit its just better me than them, well at least thats how I felt today.
I send my deepest sympathy to all who knew these good people well, I guess it just affected me more than I thought it would, I did not know him.
just needed to say something, no one else to express to, I mean its just a keyboard, right?

sorry
MM

**WickedOne** · 3rd December 2006, 17:43

Hang in there man, we all feel your pain at the moment. Safe riding!!!

**Swoop** · 3rd December 2006, 17:44

It is far more than a keyboard.

This community of ours is very special. Never forget that.

**Scorpygirl** · 3rd December 2006, 17:47

Originally Posted by madmatt

I have been out all day, started with a few of us at a local service station and headed out to mba for a meal, found out sad news while there...
It just pisses me off that the good guys go first.
somedays like today I almost start wishing for it, I guess this is my situation and life, I dont want to rant about shit its just better me than them, well at least thats how I felt today.
I send my deepest sympathy to all who knew these good people well.
I guess it just affected me more than I thought it would.
just needed to say something, no one else to express to, I mean its just a keyboard, right?

sorry
MM

I totally understand how you feel mate. The question is always - why? Take care and there are real people behind the keyboards who are feeling very sad and upset too about this weekends sad events. We all need to support one another.

**Paul in NZ** · 3rd December 2006, 17:55

Originally Posted by madmatt

It just pisses me off that the good guys go first.
sorry
MM

Don't be sorry mate ... Its life eh?

Dude - the good guys don't go first - they go every day. Every white cross, every obit is someones lover, father, mother brother, sister etc. Difference is - you just lost a highly regarded member of YOUR tribe, your campfire, your family. Nothing wrong with emotion at this time - its a great loss.

Just be careful eh? Love while you can - because life IS unpredictable...

**quickbuck** · 3rd December 2006, 19:55

Originally Posted by Paul in NZ

Don't be sorry mate ... Its life eh?

Dude - the good guys don't go first - they go every day. Every white cross, every obit is someones lover, father, mother brother, sister etc. Difference is - you just lost a highly regarded member of YOUR tribe, your campfire, your family. Nothing wrong with emotion at this time - its a great loss.

Just be careful eh? Love while you can - because life IS unpredictable...

Well put that man... Very well put.

Hang in there MadMarty, and all those feeling the same way.

**elle-f** · 3rd December 2006, 20:02

Madmatt - and i can vouch you are mad *laffin*.....dont ever think thoughts like that. You are too good a person to be wanting anything to happen to you. It was just awesome meeting you today and the guys and Mel. I was laffin as i was riding along just thinking about how awesome the KB forum is and we are meeting people we normally wouldnt. We are more than just a bit of font on a page and you know it.

Call in anytime you are this way - i will PM you my celly no and home no. 19 Garrison Street - Oh and excuse the mess and the loopy dog!

Have a wonderful week and we will all catch up no doubt. The news was terribly sad i agree but it didnt stop me from feeling absolutely rapt that i was with a good bunch of people today - yesterday too for that matter.

**chanceyy** · 3rd December 2006, 20:19

hi matt

words can not easily express how we all feel .. I only met LB/dss3 & UncleB @ manfeild top guys, who impressed me with their friendliness, knowledge, & freely gave their time to talk bikes with a newbie

& today words fail me .. devestation is about as close as it gets .. how much of an impact 3 top blokes can have on an individual.

everyone is feeling the devestation, from those who shared close freindships with the three, & those of us who didn't know them very well, to those who only knew them by the written word ..

All we can do is live our lives without regrets & make the most of every day cause we all never know when our time is up

the only other thing I take heart in .. all three died doing something they truly truly loved .. Its just everyone left behind picking up the peices as best we can that is suffering ..

typing/talking about how you feel will be a part of the healing process .. just do not bottle it up ... let it out ..

**Macktheknife** · 3rd December 2006, 23:03

Despite the shit that is slung here frequently, (always!) KB is a community, and when we lose someone from that community we are all affected. There are people on KB that I might only meet in person once, but be friends online for years, I would be no less upset by their passing than anyone else that I have friendship, respect and admiration for. I am deeply saddened by the tragic events of this weekend, but in a wierd way I feel better being able to share the grief with others on here, even though the words are so inadequate for the feelings.
When my time comes to leave this world, I only hope that I have made a mark as indelible as they have on the hearts of those I care for.

**Lissa** · 4th December 2006, 08:44

Sorry I didnt post yesterday to this Matt. Just remember you meet some new 'friends' from KB yesterday, even though the afternoon was crap to say the least, the ride to martinborough was awesome... and you guys really looked after me.

I don't want you to go riding when you feel this way, you have to promise me. I dont want to come on to KB or read in the paper that something has happened to you... will kick your butt if I do! When you feel low, dont go for a ride, stop, breath... sometimes its better to go slow. Remember you can always contact me, come around for a coffee and talk.

Mel

**MSTRS:Me** · 4th December 2006, 09:02

Originally Posted by Macktheknife

When my time comes to leave this world, I only hope that I have made a mark as indelible as they have on the hearts of those I care for.

A hope we all share and call our own.

**madmatt** · 4th December 2006, 10:04

thankyou all, Look I did not mean to come across in a bad way, we all have our demons, was trying to get some of mine out, I am shit with words, just cant get that mad feeling out of me, then you hear about this stuff and wonder why when you push so hard yourself, , , or something like that , ahhhh fuck, its all to hard to explain.anyway sorry to anyone I bothered.

MM

**WickedOne** · 4th December 2006, 10:09

Mate, you didn't bother anyone. We are all feeling the same way you are and you need to remember that there is a huge community here and we all feel your sorrow. Take care friend.

**carver** · 4th December 2006, 10:14

Originally Posted by madmatt

I have been out all day, started with a few of us at a local service station and headed out to mba for a meal, found out sad news while there...
It just pisses me off that the good guys go first.
somedays like today I almost start wishing for it, I guess this is my situation and life, I dont want to rant about shit its just better me than them, well at least thats how I felt today.
I send my deepest sympathy to all who knew these good people well, I guess it just affected me more than I thought it would, I did not know him.
just needed to say something, no one else to express to, I mean its just a keyboard, right?

sorry
MM

yea, i kinda felt the same way...me head was in turmoil.

**Macktheknife** · 4th December 2006, 10:31

Originally Posted by WickedOne

Mate, you didn't bother anyone. We are all feeling the same way you are and you need to remember that there is a huge community here and we all feel your sorrow. Take care friend.

What he said....
We are all grieving for the loss of our friends, no need to apologise. Stay strong, and keep talking to those around you.
Mack