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Thread: Bloody wildlife!!

  1. #1
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    Bloody wildlife!!

    If it weren't for good brakes and caffeine a giant specimen of the native fauna could have written off my new car 3 minutes from my gate this morning ............ same bastard that i narrowly missed week before last on the bike, I think.

    Still shaking - and remembering that a 'roo DID wipe out SPman's bike just down the road
    a couple of months ago - I'm now wondering if kangaroos should be confined to museums?
    ........'Cause i'd rather that THEY were stuffed than I was!!

    -----------------------------------------------


    There have been those among us, love
    All Creatures great and small,
    That ‘roos could wreck my motorbike
    They just don’t care at all.

    Steve Irwin’s gonna hate me
    Of that I have no doubt
    Cause, if it’s bouncing up the road
    I’M GONNA TAKE IT OUT!

    I’ll get an APC or tank
    And run the roads at speed
    through kangaroos and wallabies
    and leave them there to bleed

    Those bastards never indicate
    Have no insurance cover -
    I really don’t see motorbikes
    Should be the ones to suffer!

    When they wander in my path
    where bush and roadway meet,
    better THEIR blood on my head
    than MY blood in the street...

    I am the Wildlife Worrier
    Don’t care for conservation
    I have a higher purpose now
    it’s called self-preservation!
    ... ...

    Grass wedges its way between the closest blocks of marble and it brings them down. This power of feeble life which can creep in anywhere is greater than that of the mighty behind their cannons....... - Honore de Balzac

  2. #2
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    I understand they make good soup...
    $2,000 cash if you find a buyer for my house, kumeuhouseforsale@straightshooters.co.nz for details

  3. #3
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    Thank gawd we don't have that to worry about as well...mind you, they are predictably unpredictable - much like cage drivers really, I suppose!
    Diarrhoea is hereditary - it runs in your jeans

    If my nose was running money, I'd blow it all on you...

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by mstriumph View Post
    Still shaking - and remembering that a 'roo DID wipe out SPman's bike just down the road
    a couple of months ago - I'm now wondering if kangaroos should be confined to museums?

    I am the Wildlife Worrier
    Don’t care for conservation
    I have a higher purpose now
    it’s called self-preservation!
    [/FONT]



    LOL!!! Nice poem! Ah! the joys of living in that great brown land off to our left! We only have errant steel and glass beasts here! They too, seem oblivious to us road users and are more than keen to bump into us or jump out in front of us us at every opportunity!
    You don't get to be an old dog without learning a few tricks.
    Shorai Powersports batteries are very trick!

  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by ManDownUnder View Post
    I understand they make good soup...
    Yeah, but how much soup do you need?


    Oooh, I know, school breakfasts! One roo per school?

  6. #6
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    surely you can eat roo meat? probably tastes like chicken.....
    I ride the dirt, I ride the tide
    I search the outside, search inside
    I know I'll always burn to be
    Remind me of what left this outlaw torn
    ~ The Outlaw Torn (Metallica: Load 1996)


  7. #7
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    i thought you'd hit a fuckin abo.

    better luck next time.

  8. #8
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    Don't be ridiculous. Kangaroos can't make soup, that's just stupid.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edbear View Post
    Ah! the joys of living in that great brown land off to our left!
    You mean the WEST Island?

    Good to hear you're still in one piece...
    "You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely."

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edbear View Post
    We only have errant steel and glass beasts here!

    What.. you mean Hilux's, Torrano's, Jeep's, etcetc.. as per last night's docummentary????


    Glad to hear you are ok mstriumph!!!

    just shoot the f@#*%*s
    GET ON
    SIT DOWN
    SHUT UP
    HANG ON

  11. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by MyGSXF View Post
    What.. you mean Hilux's, Torrano's, Jeep's, etcetc.. as per last night's docummentary????



    LOL!!! If it was only them, but it's ALL 4-wheeled vehicles! We're vastly outnumbered and outgunned!!!!
    You don't get to be an old dog without learning a few tricks.
    Shorai Powersports batteries are very trick!

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edbear View Post
    .................. We're vastly outnumbered and outgunned!!!!
    if they start ARMING the wretched 'roos I'M LEAVING!!!!
    ... ...

    Grass wedges its way between the closest blocks of marble and it brings them down. This power of feeble life which can creep in anywhere is greater than that of the mighty behind their cannons....... - Honore de Balzac

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by The_Dover View Post
    i thought you'd hit a fuckin abo.

    better luck next time.
    Dover how can you be so naive ? Abo's don't rate recognition. They were still sport up until pre WW2. Mind you they do have a flag. Bit more organised than our natives.
    Didn't you know about the Kiwi travelling through Dawin ? Came around a corner, there were 3 abo's standing in the middle of the road (Probably pissed as usual) Hit the lot, first one got bowled and flew over the roof second one went under the car and the third came through the window and ended up in the back seat. He freaks out and doesn't know what to do. Being a dickhead he decides to find a Police station and report it. He got off cos they charged the first abo with leaving the scene,the second with obstructing traffic and the third with breaking and entering. I believe this to be true I went thru Darwin before Cyclone Tracy as were warned by the MP's "It is an offence to have sexual relations with a Native Australian Aborigine" Section 61 a. b. or c. I forget. I felt for the first time that Military Law had a purpose. Fuck they were ugly never saw them without the flies tho.


    Sorry Dover didn't read all your post Bit of a premature ejaculation. You know what I mean aye ?
    Last edited by doc; 9th February 2007 at 18:46. Reason: Cheap wine again

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by doc View Post
    ....................... warned by the MP's "It is an offence to have sexual relations with a Native Australian Aborigine" Section 61 a. b. or c. I forget. I felt for the first time that Military Law had a purpose. Fuck they were ugly never saw them without the flies tho.


    ...........
    ...........didn't think they even had TROUSERS at that time?
    ... ...

    Grass wedges its way between the closest blocks of marble and it brings them down. This power of feeble life which can creep in anywhere is greater than that of the mighty behind their cannons....... - Honore de Balzac

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