Best insult?

[JATZ]

i would not cross the road to piss in your mouth if your teeth were on fire

Oh thats good. I'll try to slip that one into conversation before the end of the week

[Weaver]

You ain't nothing but a cold fart warmed up.

[Number One]

You think you are hot shit on toast but you are really cold fart on bread.

Can't remember any really good ones from KB...though I still remember one from Finn aimed at me that still cracks me up and brings a smile to my dial.

Something about me being a pimply faced little boy and it being past my bedtime so I should go back to bed so he can pop around and do my mother

I don't get the insult your mother thing either...it doesn't actually upset me for some random stranger on a website to say she is fat or ugly or that they are going root her...meh, I say good luck to them - she'd tear them a new arsehole, one tough lady that one.

[Mr Merde]

I know you arent a wanker, but I wish your father was.

[ynot slow]

So you remember your first sexual experience then,shame nobody was there too enjoy it with you.

[MIXONE]

A little tame for today but when I was young (and pissing people off) an old guy looked at me and scowled:

"Your mother couldn't have been a good woman, to have such a bastard"

I ignored him at the time but it stayed with me for longer than I was comfortable with.

Now I am an old guy and I understand more than ever what he meant, strange ol'e world eh!

One of my old favourites also a bit tame for current trends is "I hope it rains on the day your parents get married"

[bogan]

You're just mutton dressed up as lamb.

[1billyboy]

You are the result of a drunken fuck

[Indiana_Jones]

You think you're hot shit in a champagne glass.. But really you're just cold diarhhea in a dixie cup!

-Indy

[Dean]

Another favourite of mine, soo true on this.

lady you are and forever will be a 5 dollar!, no 2 dollar!, no 37 cent!, all i have is a quarter, can i write you a check?, keep the change, tip your waitress, make a wish blow out your candles, the rock said blow the candles not the pool boy!!, red tag bottom basement half price slut!!!

[ynot slow]

Know a guy who was slightly pissed at Maccas after a stockcar meeting,a dwarf(is this pc)walked into the place,Bruce decided to tell his mate queitly "that's what happens when ya pull out of a root",unfortunately everyone heard it.

[Jez]

But, as an aside, I always wonder what it is with insults which actually insult their mother or sister. Why should the women bear the brunt of the insulting remark e.g. son of a bitch, yo' mamma so...., and some of the offerings which have shown up already in this thread. Insult the person themselves if you're going to do it - not their poor old mum!

I dont get the mum and sis thing either, so i go with this:

I'd insult your mum, but shes just as ashamed of you as the rest of the world.

[ducatilover]

You are the disgusting result of a broken prophylactic

[kiwi cowboy]

nose pickin, buttfucking,ball scratching red neck!

shit suebike dont be so hard on yourselfi've never seen you pickin ya nose yet

[Finn]

You think you are hot shit on toast but you are really cold fart on bread.

Can't remember any really good ones from KB...though I still remember one from Finn aimed at me that still cracks me up and brings a smile to my dial.

Something about me being a pimply faced little boy and it being past my bedtime so I should go back to bed so he can pop around and do my mother

I don't get the insult your mother thing either...it doesn't actually upset me for some random stranger on a website to say she is fat or ugly or that they are going root her...meh, I say good luck to them - she'd tear them a new arsehole, one tough lady that one.

Ah the good ol days...