hehe, these stories all make me laugh. Its nice when the mistakes dont result in death or serious injury as they all too often do.
hehe, these stories all make me laugh. Its nice when the mistakes dont result in death or serious injury as they all too often do.
"Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety." - Benjamin Franklin (1706-90)
"I would rather be exposed to the inconveniences attending to much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it." - Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)
"Motorcycling is not inherently dangerous. It is, however, EXTREMELY unforgiving of inattention, ignorance, incompetence and stupidity!" - Anonymous
"Live to Ride, Ride to Live"
In hindsight...riding through Te Hana at 70k on the gixxer, texting to Black Yoshi to see where the group were having lunch!
It seemed perfectly reasonable at the time..........
“- He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.”
Hmmm...most recent would be on my Europe trip over the last couple of months.
Riding onto the motorway on the Cote d'Azur in the south of France at 10pm.
Felt the petrol run out about 20m short of the on-ramp so pulled off into the last side road just in time and the guys in front of me carried on not knowing I wasn't behind them anymore.
I pushed the fully-laden bike for 2 and a half hours until I came across a cafe/bar that was just closing.
The owner's mate took me to a service station to fill up a couple of litre bottles to get me going again.
I got on the bike again and took off to find a good spot to kip.
I somehow got into the airport and got stuck in some diabolical roundabout system that I couldn't get out of.
I rode round and round this damn airport for about 40 minutes until I finally got out.
I then ended up lost in some town.
I finally got back to where I started and for some reason thought I would shoot up the motorway to Cannes which is where we were headed and I might catch up with the others.
I went past three exits and thought I would just make for the next one and then pull off.
Well.......predictably......I ran out of petrol again soon after.....on a French motorway....at 2am.
No proper pull-off area within cooee, I'm stopped in a short half-lane....no credit on my phone....nobody knows where I am.....oh woe, oh woe.
Nothing for it but to pull out the sleeping bag and doss down over the barrier with my bike parked on the side of the motorway.
Surely a patrol will come along at some stage and find me......nah.
About 4am a Volvo stops just behind me and a businessman gets out to have a leak or something.
I loom out of the darkness dressed in my black leathers looking a bit worse for wear and speaking in tongues.
He threw his hands up while babbling hysterically in French, bolted for the car and took off!!!!!
That was a very lonely night.
Dumbarse!
...she took the KT, and left me the Buell to ride....(Blues Brothers)
I know a few of those (apart from those already posted).
A guy at school, drinking too many beers, then riding his bike side-saddle, pissing off the side, past some cops.
A classmate, following his brother's instructions when riding his brother's bike for the first time: "Twist the throttle till that needle is just below that red mark there, then let the clutch out".
I'm not sure who was stupider - the classmate, or his brother, pissing himself laughing as his newish bike crashed into the fence.
My sister's boyfriend, trying to "crack the ton" on our street, with his girlfriend's brother on the back, on a borrowed T500, on a busy Saturday afternoon.
Yes, 97 mph on a 30mph zone in traffic IS very scary.
A guy I went to high school with buying a Kawasaki 500 MachIII as his first bike. He dropped it nearly every week. When he (inevitably?) wrote it off, he replaced it with a Z1.
Alright, I'll 'fess up - I've done some dumb things too.
Here are some, in chronological order.
First day I rode a bike: stopped on a steep hill, across the hill (good thinking), lost my balance, and put my foot down on the downhill side (not good).
Testing the first bike I owned: dropped it in the owner's rose garden.
Wheelieng the first bike I owned up the driveway, realising I'd run out of room and was going a bit quick, grabbing a handful of front brake and sliding to a stop on the slippery concrete, lying down, just as the bike touched the back wall of the garage.
Kick-starting the Elsinore a bazillion times without success (very tiring), noticing the killswitch was in the "Off" position (good), switching it to "Run" (OK), kicking it again (hmm...), igniting all the gas in the cylinder and muffler (...umm) which backfired, and sent my knee into the very hard and unforgiving mirror bolt on the handlebar.
Ow.
Well - actually more like eye-watering, breath-grabbing, hobbling-around-in-a-circle-for-a-couple-of-minutes-trying-not-to-scream PAIN.
Writing off the first bike I owned: practicing wheelies, came up to an uncontrolled intersection, and planted my bike in an uncontrolled fashion into the side of a car.
Writing off the fifth bike I owned: Planted my bike in a semi-controlled fashion into the side of a semi-uncontrolled car (good huh? Some progress there!)
Actually, this wasn't really the result of my stupidity, except that a little voice in my head said, "I don't think he's seen you; tootle him vigorously with the horn!" and I didn't, he hadn't, and we clashed rather violently.
And painfully...
Now THIS is rather stupid.
I had new front brake pads fitted to my FahrtSturm, and they needed bedding in. I almost always use 1 or 2 fingers, but obviouslythis called for something more aggressive. Fifty metres or so from having them fitted, I start giving them death, with four (4) fingers.
On a damp road.
On a smooth, damp road.
On a smooth, damp, road, with tarsnakes.
They worked! They bit!!
The grip from the front tyre wasn't there! And then all of a sudden, a few millliseconds later, it was!
The bike stopped! I didn't let go of the lever (those damned 4-finger death grips!), and I didn't stop!
I landed on my head in front of a group of road workers.
But, of course I learned, and never, ever again did anything remotely stupid.
Of course I did.
Not.
I was riding my VFR home one night, and the traffic wasn't going anywhere in a hurry. But I WAS in a hurry.
I was also - to be fair - not feeling very well, and my brain was malfunctioning (the droogs had worn off), and because it was malfunctioning, my judgement was faulty. And because it was malfunctioning, I didn't really notice I wasn't fully capable of rational thought.
So, I come upon this non-moving traffic. I don't want to be silly, and overtake on the right, because there's nowhere to go, and there's traffic coming.
I know - I'll overtake (undertake?) on the left!
Uh-oh - the truck ahead of me is starting to move forward, and it might not be safe to go between the truck and the kerb/curb/kurb/cerb. I could get squished!
No worries - I'll shoot up that convenient little gravel bit, up onto the footpath, then back onto the road up ahead. (Yes, I've overtaken on the footpath a few times, as you do...)
Here we go... better scrub off a bit of speed, and ...
When the front tyre (which wasn't a knobbly, y'unnerstand, as VFRs don't generally have 'em) hit the grassy verge, forward progress turned into downward/sidewards progress, and I face-planted on the footpath.
Luckily, there was a captive audience in the stationary traffic, and (as if that weren't enough) lotsa people in the service station to my left, to enjoy my stunting.
I think that was even more embarrassing than the BrakepadBeddinginEpisode.![]()
... and that's what I think.
Or summat.
Or maybe not...
Dunno really....![]()
As a complete noob, only been riding for 6 months or so and still on learners I have done alot of stupid things, but lucky nothing too serious, and things I have been able to learn from. My main goal in life is to advoid doing serious stupid things.
But things I have done, and continue to do are.. but arent really biggies:
1. Putting my bike into neutral when taking off, and ALWAYS infront of other bikers..... I just cant get the hang of looking cool when I am on my bike. (yes I can hear them laughing)
2. Dropping the bike in a drive way, and in the gutter.
3. Dropping my bike when trying to get it on the center stand.
4. Stalling bike... only when other bikers are around, otherwise I never ever do it. Grrrrr.
But the one good thing is... most bikers have done the exact same thing, even if they admit it or not.![]()
" It appears that the website has become alive. This happens to computers and robots sometimes. Am I scared of a stupid computer? Please. The computer should be scared of me."
Yeah , i'd pay money for that too.
I used to leave blackies in garage from locking up front when arriving home. until I left a tyre print and dent on freezer, holes in the wall from freezer impacting and sprained thumbs.
As I stopped at the destination car park my right side shoe lace got caught on the foot peg causing me to completely loose my balance. Dropped the bike, hit the kill switch and summoned some help to get it back up. When I returned 12 hours later the bike wouldn't start (and we all know why don't we -kill switch!). Thing is the battery warning light had been flashing for ages so I naturally though it was dead. Three strapping young fullas exhausted themselves pushing me up and down the road and then I remembered... I'm a member of the AA! Half an hour later they arrive and then I remember... the kill switch!!!
Ride home happily but with a new modification -seems the drop has done something to the throttle and I now have cruise control. It's kinda cool but unsettling at the same time. I ride around like this for several weeks saving up my money before seeing the mechanic only to have him give the thing a twist -all fixed, no charge.
There really is so much to learn!
[
The list is long and humiliating...
Here's one that springs to mind: I was racing a fairly large bunch of riders to a campsite we'd hired for a weekend away. Me and my ego wanted to get there first, so I was riding hell hard. I did get to the campsite first, and somehow neglected to notice the chain strung between the gate posts. I hit the chain at some insane speed and it shot in between my front tyre and mudguard, changing the dynamics and shape of the forks completely. The bike stopped and flipped onto it's back and I got some airtime which ended at a huge pine tree.
"Safety Cameras" Yeah, right!
Riding down parkway extention in wainui on my cb250rs 2up at the ripe old age of 15. Come to the round about that i usually do a wheelie over(has a small crest in it) and not to sure what went through my mind but thought id try a jump and WHAK in to the side of a van at 75kph. I walked away a bit sore mate had a broken ankle. Wont do that again.![]()
Highsided at approx 10kmph outside Africa Bar, on my mates bike, who was standing 20m away... the reason was mud covering the rear tyre on the GSXR1000k3. I was on the ground before I knew WTF was going on. Thankfully no damage other than a bent rearset which was fixed the next day. Still felt/looked like twit... and no matter how many times my mate says 'dont worry' i still feel responsible!
KiwiBitcher
where opinion holds more weight than fact.
It's better to not pass and know that you could have than to pass and find out that you can't. Wait for the straight.
rode my T-Bird through someones lounge at a party one night,grabed a handfull and dumped the clutch.tore the carpet clean off the floor. when traction took over..couldnt stop and embeded the front wheel in the lounge wall
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