Depression...

[ynot slow]

Good to share, been through that experience too.

Don't quite agree about the suicide comment but understand why you say that. The problem is that by the time a person wants to end their life, their brain is not operating the right way. They are not thinking rationally. Call it temporary insanity if that helps, labels don't matter. Getting relief from the pain inside the head, the thoughts of hopelessness, becomes a valid solution - at that time.

If a person feels like that - ask for help. See a doctor, counsellor, somebody. Its actually a recoverable condition even if it recurs from time to time. Its the chemistry in your brain out of balance - not you. Just like diabetes it is treatable.

Agree,but present circumstances and suicide tend to annoy me lol,ma in law didn't want to die etc.Had a mate whose nephew shot himself,at the funeral everyone said what a shame,how sad etc,the uncle got up and said what crap,who found him(dad)who can't understand (parents),and generally gave his nephew bollocks for taking easy way out.His nephews mates agreed afterwards as they had no closure,one said fair enough if ill and no hope of surviving,end it quickly.

[ManDownUnder]

Agree,but present circumstances and suicide tend to annoy me

... it's a big issue - I'd prefer you guys to agree to disagree rather than argue it out in here... I can't see it being resolved too quickly, and it might dilute other (very valuable) aspects of this conversation...

[Winston001]

Agree,but present circumstances and suicide tend to annoy me lol,ma in law didn't want to die etc.Had a mate whose nephew shot himself,at the funeral everyone said what a shame,how sad etc,the uncle got up and said what crap,who found him(dad)who can't understand (parents),and generally gave his nephew bollocks for taking easy way out.His nephews mates agreed afterwards as they had no closure,one said fair enough if ill and no hope of surviving,end it quickly.

Understood and your feelings are natural, shared by most of the population. But don't think deliberately ending ones life is easy or selfish - that perspective is the sort of lack of understanding which drives desperately sad people deeper into despair.

Imagine feeling like you are so worthless that death is the only option - stop being a burden on your family, end the dark pain.... Then you get told such thoughts are selfish - that really makes you feel even lower.

The thing is, by the time a person can only see one way out, they have no sense of self left - no ego, no future, nothing. Just black. And it hurts - worse still, its inside your head and you can't escape it. You can't be selfish if you are worthless so better for everyone else - all the strong HTFU ones, if you just go away......

[ynot slow]

True to Winston,it possibly has a lot to do with the mental fortitude of the person concerned,if they want to kill themselves in the belief that is best for them they will.The people saying htfu and tut tut noises do no help at all,as John Kirwin said htfu was not the thing to say to him.

Even talking to close friends brings no respite to the problem,I no a person who did that,the guy seemed fine and obviously the demons in his mind didn't agree,he died 2 days later,left a couple of mates wondering wtf they did,could've done,and blamed themselves for a while.

[mstriumph]

i'm depressed ........

[Winston001]

Even talking to close friends brings no respite to the problem,I no a person who did that,the guy seemed fine and obviously the demons in his mind didn't agree,he died 2 days later,left a couple of mates wondering wtf they did,could've done,and blamed themselves for a while.

Yeah......talking is good but really it needs to be with an empathic person or a skilled professional. Even then there are no guarantees. One of the reasons we have counsellors and psychologists is that they are strangers - non-judgemental and outside the friends/family loop. Confiding deep and irrational fears is easier with a stranger.

That is one reason I regret the loss of religion/spirituality in our community. A couple of generations ago, a troubled person went to their minister or priest. We've replaced them with secular listeners but many think going to a counsellor is weak. Plus there is a cost.

mstriumph - i'm depressed ........

Anything in particular set it off? Being sad/depressed occasionally is perfectly normal for everyone. Its only a problem if it occurs regularly, can't be shaken off, and appears for no apparent reason.

[Blackshear]

It could be "a teenager thing" - the rampant hormones you have flooding your system don't help.
It's good that getting that off your chest helped. It's a big step forward.

Who knows ha ha.
Yeah it was nice, odd for me though, really.

yeah bud - tell someone - tell us - just make sure you get it outside you.
it's nice to see others feel like you sometimes - and cope and get better.
be kind to yourself - what you feel isn't wrong, it's what happens and letting yourself feel it and deal with it is the natural process of getting better.
lean on your friends if you need.
i've been leaning on mine the past few weeks - it's not easy to ask for help - but very worthwhile.

ken

The whole moral support thing does have merits to it, I agree. Positive reinforcement with someone you know has/is going through a similar phase/process/lane as yourself.

...put a little fun into each day mate... aim for something - and achieve it. Even if it's only a walk to the dairy to buy bread, or putting on a BBQ for your friends or... whatever it is YOU would like to achieve.

Make it small enough to be achievable, and really enjoy the achievement. Be proud YOU did it. To hell with what anyone else thinks... if it was a challenge for you to do it... and you did it anyway... stand tall.



There's a few in here that know about that and how it really works. Bloody good onya for just putting your hand up in here man. That's no small feat...!

The chances are it will happen again. I'm saying that so if/when it does you're able to see it for what it is. It is NOT defeat, it is NOT failure. It's actually quite likely, and it's a sign you still need some help...

... so - go find some...!



It's not a teenage thing - it's a thing of someone wanting relief from something. It's not good, but it's not "only you". Talk to someone... that you want to talk to. Lots of people will want to help, but if if you don't care, or want to hear what they have to say then it's not helping you.

Good luck man - try to make each day better than the last... just little by little.

How do I reply! So much to take in.
There is a flaw in the achievement thing. I has a very low dose of self motivation coarsing through my blood. Mostly the reason I dropped out of school. I saw it as 'I know I can achieve all this crap if I set my mind to it, so why bother if I already know if I can.'
Sounds really bloody lazy now that I read it. But yeah, it's just how I view everything, really.

Bleh. I must sleep now. Need energy to reason tomorrow, as I'll either be unemployed or not by the end of the workshift. Involves fatheaded shop foremen and respect issues. Not good for Chris to be around him. Wish me luck people!

Lastly, thanks for your inputs. I do greatly appreciate them, really.
Sometimes it tough to lean over, when you're worried noone will catchya.
I wish unto you all a good day

[ManDownUnder]

How do I reply! So much to take in.

no need - this is all about you.

There is a flaw in the achievement thing. I has a very low dose of self motivation coarsing through my blood. Mostly the reason I dropped out of school. I saw it as 'I know I can achieve all this crap if I set my mind to it, so why bother if I already know if I can.'
Sounds really bloody lazy now that I read it. But yeah, it's just how I view everything, really.

Nope - that IS normal. Why try for something you don't value? It'd be like be aiming for a job in the church. No matter how small or lofty the role - if I don't care I'm not ging to be motivated.

Start small. Bowl along to a few of the KB events (thu night ride comes to mind). Achieve that! Get a few successes under your belt and you'll start enjoy this thing... aim for something else... then grow. It's going to take a while...

Sometimes it tough to lean over, when you're worried noone will catchya.
I wish unto you all a good day

Yeah well there's a number of people in here willing to help... so long as you help yourself too.

[eurodick]

What do you think of this.... Do you know someone who has it? What are the best coping skills for this? Should you continue to ride when negative destructive thoughts are about in your mind?

If you do have depression please PM me as I'd like to know more... I'll explain why when I reply.

Yeah well maybe riding on the road ain't too hot when ya got self destructive tendancies, but can recommend the great outdoors on a dirt bike. Hvae used it as a therapeutic tool myself both for me and others. Have 15 years esperience in Mental Health, so I know the risks and benefits.
Hope all is well
Cheers

[WolfCollared]

You can only do so much to help people like anything in life.

Relate it to biking, you can give a new rider all the advice and talk about your mistakes etc, but at the end of the day its up to them to ride the bike alone.

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

I guess after the year I have had had it is not surprising I am sinking further and further into deep depression. Emotionally, physically, spiritually I am exhausted - the brain is fried and I got to the stage I just could not think at all. Shit was happening from every which way I have not even had a chance to try and get up - there is no energy left to fight. No Hope. And when it gets to that stage you know you are in the shit big time - sorry I can only speak for myself. Anyway I tried some alternative healing methods - with some bloody disastrous results. I can laugh about some of it now - but yes I was desperate.

Suffice to say last week it came to head - in that the death of my closest friend Ahu finally hit home and I began to grieve - it was 2 months yesterday and I finally cleared out his place then too.

I have 13 years 4 months sobriety and I nearly drank Thursday nite. Usually alkies will drink over a busted relationship - I wondered what it would take for me to even think seriously about taking a drink - well I found out. It was as if all those years of trying to change myself etc were negated and meant nothing. I was in the mindset I needn't have bothered, haven't learnt a fkn thing, still a crock of shit as a person - etc. Long story anyway - normally it would have been water off a duck's back. I made sure I stayed at home - I was telling myself I would go into town to have coffee but I knew where I was really gonna go and I had all the drinks lined up - in my head. In the end I did manage to get someone on the phone.

No amount of meds can take this shit away unfortunately. You have to work through it - but christ a break would be good - just so I can build myself up and recover from the other shit. To this end it is fuck everything and ride. Packing up my tent and airbed and just go. I will take it easy, cos the health aint perfect - but what it will do for me mentally, is to rejevunate, re-assess, enjoy nature and friends, and push myself physically to get better. This was by no means my idea - I had to ask for solutions from a friend - cos my brain was fried. I so need time out. Don't know how I'm gonna do it all but it will get done and I plan to be outta here in 2 weeks.

[Mom]

Packing up my tent and airbed and just go. I will take it easy, cos the health aint perfect - but what it will do for me mentally, is to rejevunate, re-assess, enjoy nature and friends, and push myself physically to get better.

You wont need the tent or the airbed if you get as far north as us love. Be safe on your travels, stop in here if you want to.

Congratulations on your continuing sobriety! One day at a time love is all you have to do.


Anne

[Edbear]

You wont need the tent or the airbed if you get as far north as us love. Be safe on your travels, stop in here if you want to.

Congratulations on your continuing sobriety! One day at a time love is all you have to do.


Anne

Hear, hear! Recomended!

My sentiments the same... You can PM me anytime...

[vifferman]

I hope things get better for you - they sound pretty desperate, but from the sound of it you're obviously a lot stronger than you think you are. You've been through a lot, and it's understandable that you feel bad, so just go easy on yourself.
And remember - you're not alone. There's always someone here for you.

[Winston001]

And remember - you're not alone. There's always someone here for you.

Ditto, well said.