Alone for first time

**Fatjim** · 8th July 2006, 09:22

The bike's been the best therapy I've had this year, trouble is when Winter comes around you feel a bit empty. But bugger it, I'm off for another ride.....

**Skyryder** · 9th July 2006, 00:23

Originally Posted by chic 'n' charge

Other half ended relationship - so not really my choice!.

Thanks heaps for your support - I know I will get through, just lonely I guess being away from friends and family I grew up with - came up here for relationship so now that's ended kinda feel lost, but my independence will return.

Thanks for tips.

When you come to understand that your best friend is yourself you will never be alone. Does not mean that you don't miss company just its a learning curve of how to handle it when know ones there. Just another thing many of us do ride alone.................we you are but one member of the largest motorcycle club in the world.

Skyryder

Skyryder

**Sniper** · 24th August 2006, 16:16

Originally Posted by chic 'n' charge

Other half ended relationship - so not really my choice!.

Thanks heaps for your support - I know I will get through, just lonely I guess being away from friends and family I grew up with - came up here for relationship so now that's ended kinda feel lost, but my independence will return.

Thanks for tips.

You know where we are Kelz. You have our number and Im up ther in a few weeks. Send us a text or PM if you need anything. Or get hold of me on messenger.

TJ says hi and thanks.

**surfchick** · 24th August 2006, 18:31

if it makes you feel any better I'm having a chocolate bagel for dinner tonight. and a cup of tea. might have to forage some protein tomorrow or there will be trouble...

**The_Dover** · 24th August 2006, 19:46

Originally Posted by surfchick

might have to forage some protein tomorrow or there will be trouble...

too easy.

I'll bit my tongue.

**chic 'n' charge** · 27th August 2006, 19:30

Well it's been 3 months since I started out on my own, and I've survived. Sitting here online Friday night & hello who pops up with a message saying "Hi are you ready to chat with me yet" - yip THE EX.....

So here's the question - is he playing major head games or is he truly interested in finding out how I am - he didn't care when we were together eh so my guess is he just wants to rub it in my face on how happy he is

So any ideas on what I should do about it?

**Sniper** · 27th August 2006, 19:42

You know what I think, told you on MSN :P

**chanceyy** · 27th August 2006, 19:51

Originally Posted by chic 'n' charge

Well it's been 3 months since I started out on my own, and I've survived. Sitting here online Friday night & hello who pops up with a message saying "Hi are you ready to chat with me yet" - yip THE EX.....

So here's the question - is he playing major head games or is he truly interested in finding out how I am - he didn't care when we were together eh so my guess is he just wants to rub it in my face on how happy he is

So any ideas on what I should do about it?

ohh honey .. been having that myself over the last few months .. via texts with pics

yeah it is head games .. he may not actually want you .. but does not want anyone else to want you either ....

I asked my ex flat out ... what do you want from me ??....

he asked if he could come home for sex but no relationship ...... errrrrrrrrrr no the fact that I have let him go & not fallen on my face ( not that I would ever admit it to him) ... its taken a few months of bullshit but he has now backed off ...

so honey yes it is head games .. he prolly wants to come back to what he knows, but you have an important question to answer .. can you trust him ??.. will you take him back ?? would it be the same ??

& know one thing honey ... you have all the power ... its your choice .. but remember there are plenty of other guys out there who will treat you better .. you just need time to heal

good luck hon

**mart1** · 27th August 2006, 22:39

So any ideas on what I should do about it?[/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]

[/QUOTE]

revenge sex.... blenheims only 2 hours away, I can be there in 47 minutes

**Swoop** · 31st August 2006, 22:37

Originally Posted by chanceyy

...so honey yes it is head games .. he prolly wants to come back to what he knows, but you have an important question to answer .. can you trust him ??.. will you take him back ?? would it be the same ??

& know one thing honey ... you have all the power ... its your choice .. but remember there are plenty of other guys out there who will treat you better .. you just need time to heal

good luck hon

Very well put.
If the guy isn't going to look after (both of) you and be completely honest with you as well... then there are plenty more fish in the sea.
Chin up!

**skelstar** · 31st August 2006, 22:57

Living in that 'half-way' place is not cool. Its far too stressful. Without knowing much about your situation and having never met you Im going to give advice anyway

...make a clean break, make your life about you.

Its easier to go back, but its not the best for you in the long run.

Theres heaps of people here that feel your pain. Trust me.

**RantyDave** · 31st August 2006, 23:19

Originally Posted by chic 'n' charge

So any ideas on what I should do about it?

Fuck 'im.

No, that's not quite what I meant, is it? I think you should continue on your course of the ex being an ex. You've done the hard yards and, know what, you'll come out stronger. Are stronger. See?

You're a biker chick. Independence good. Fuck 'im.

Dave

**98tls** · 31st August 2006, 23:31

Originally Posted by chic 'n' charge

Well it's been 3 months since I started out on my own, and I've survived. Sitting here online Friday night & hello who pops up with a message saying "Hi are you ready to chat with me yet" - yip THE EX.....

So here's the question - is he playing major head games or is he truly interested in finding out how I am - he didn't care when we were together eh so my guess is he just wants to rub it in my face on how happy he is

So any ideas on what I should do about it?

Forget the prick...hes a loser and in 6 months time you wont even remember his name.....

**buellbabe** · 1st September 2006, 07:08

IGNORE HIM.
Its been 2 yrs since I had a narrow escape from a psycho and he is STILL trying to worm his way back in... so I know where you are coming from.
You can't turn your feelings on and off like a tap, don't put yourself thru more grief.
Its over and needs to stay in the past. I made the mistake of being 'friends' with my EX when we first split (cos I felt it was safer to be friends than enemies)...didn't take me long to realise thats a BIG mistake. To get him out of ya system and move on you need to have no contact.

When my EX txts me I just delete, I don't even respond.

**duncan_bayne** · 5th September 2006, 10:54

Tell him to go away, clearly and explicitly. You don't want to leave him an 'out' by being soft, or trying to spare his feelings (which usually really means trying to spare your own). But don't be rude: right now he's clingy, manipulative and desparate, you don't want him clingy, manipulative and pissed off

As for the motivation to do things ... I'm not entirely sure I want to hijack this thread into the realm of philosophy, but: before you can be & stay motivated, you need to identify your morality, that is, the values you want to persue in your life. Check out Man's Life as His Moral Standard, which sums it up better than I could.

But basically: once you choose to live life in a rationally selfish way, you won't have to worry so much about motivation - it'll more be a matter of overcoming obstacles on the path to your goals. This is a subtle distinction maybe, but one that helped me get over exactly the same feelings of "blah" that set me back a number of years ago.

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