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Thread: Traffic planner brain fade

  1. #1
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    Traffic planner brain fade

    The New Zealand Transport Agency has an employee, probably called something like a traffic planner, or traffic engineer, whose sole role is to dream up ways of compounding traffic congestion in Otaki.

    I thought that double-laneing the roundabout at the north end of town a few years ago was this person's piece de resistance. Of all the singularly stupid things that could be done to increase holiday weekend mayhem and tailbacks as far as Tatum Park, the Otaki roundabout upgrade takes a bit of beating. A good reason for a traffic planner to claim the Golden Dickhead Award and retire to Nightcaps.

    But no. Our Hero has had another brain fart. This time a traffic-light controlled pedestrian crossing about halfway along the main street.

    Has this controlled crossing reduced jay walking? No.

    Has it improved the flow of traffic? No.

    This crossing is about 5m along the road from an intersection. There are shops on one side of the road at that point, and nothing on the other. It's hardly located at a favoured crossing point, if coagulation of jaywalkers is any guide.

    I am completely flummoxed by this. All it does is further exacerbate the seething mass of inertia and frustration that is Otaki at a weekend.

    If NZTA had a spare set of traffic lights lying around doing nothing, why not pull out the roundabout and put them there? If that is too hard, why not move them 5m further south so that they control an intersection and let pedestrians cross on the diagonal so they can cross the road once instead of twice?

    If pedestrian safety is the issue, why not do a Willis Street and put up barricades to stop the lovely wee dears randomly sauntering across State Highway 1? Why not close that bloody coffee cart that draws motorists with nowhere to park like flies to a lump of raw meat?

    Searching for an obvious rationale for all of these "improvements" fair does my head in. Whoever is responsible for designing them clearly doesn't live anywhere near Otaki or travel along SH1 through that township at weekends. This is their wee joke. The Bastard. Happy fucking New Year to you.
    "Standing on your mother's corpse you told me that you'd wait forever." [Bryan Adams: Summer of 69]

  2. #2
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    I reckon all traffic planners go to the same course for qualification....graduation is when they've mastered fucking up a town plan until all traffic has to travel on just one piece of road at peak hour....

    Christchurch was well on the way to traffic planner nirvana pre quakes....the direct result of the quakes has probably sent several planners mad with joy as de facto all traffic must now use the same bits of surviving road....

    I've seldom been through Otaki but remember well having to dodge traffic and pedestrians from the cart.

  3. #3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hitcher View Post
    I am completely flummoxed by this.
    I thought the rational was pretty transparent to be honest. Get 'em stranded and siphon some of their pocket change.

    Works for 'er indoors, anyway, and I'm sure that if you'd just take the time to brows a while amongst Bendon's fluffiest you'd be a great deal less stressed about the whole issue.
    Go soothingly on the grease mud, as there lurks the skid demon

  4. #4
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    I try to avoid Otaki ... and have been successful in this regard for some time now ...
    When life throws you a curve ... Lean into it ...

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    Here's yer budget, what can you do with it? Whatever happened to overbridges (win win in my book)? I assume that they're too much of a risk with kids throwing stuff off them?
    I didn't think!!! I experimented!!!

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by mashman View Post
    Here's yer budget, what can you do with it? Whatever happened to overbridges (win win in my book)? I assume that they're too much of a risk with kids throwing stuff off them?
    The risk is people throwing themselves off them

    Living in Otaki ... who could blame them ...
    When life throws you a curve ... Lean into it ...

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    Quote Originally Posted by FJRider View Post
    The risk is people throwing themselves off them

    Living in Otaki ... who could blame them ...
    Might make housing in the area more affordable
    I didn't think!!! I experimented!!!

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    The whole problem stems from these people not being "drivers". They're simply some Wally with a piece of paper showing they managed to copy & paste a "standard" derived from another non "driver" & taught by yet another person with little interest in driving
    Science Is But An Organized System Of Ignorance
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  9. #9
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    The install of the traffic lights in the place where the pedestrian crossing was before...is actually a significant improvement. When it was a ped x the flow of pedestrians flucked up the traffic flow completely, whereas now the non jay walkers get to wait for the motorised masses. Jay walkers think twice when faced with 20 metre truck & trailers...

    The roundabout gets fixed down to one lane to avoid the turning traffic stopping the thru traffic, at busy times only mind you. Look on the bright side, at least the roundabout at Otaki is one you can see over...I reckon the NZTA dimwit that stipulated planting anything that grows taller than a rednecks lawn on it...should be hung by the bollocks...preferably from a coffee cart Example, Paremata roundabout...how dumb is that? Flamethrower it needs

  10. #10
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    agreed,one holiday weekend it took an hour to get from Levin or there abouts to marketville

  11. #11
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    Traffic engineers/planners, "interesting people" that they are.

    When I was involved in roading (pavement engineering) they were always at odds with us. They're like architects and the theory versus practical aspects of building design and construction.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by caspernz View Post
    The roundabout gets fixed down to one lane to avoid the turning traffic stopping the thru traffic, at busy times only mind you.
    Far too many do not understand the simple principle of single lane roundabout ... or the rules (and reasons for the rules) ...

    Chuck in an extra lane and chaos is ensured ...
    When life throws you a curve ... Lean into it ...

  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Grumph View Post
    I've seldom been through Otaki but remember well having to dodge traffic and pedestrians from the cart.
    Coming back from Wangas day after boxing dau that's where thetraffic turns to shit and is backed up for ages, it's the reason I fly in and out of Palmy
    Quote Originally Posted by mashman View Post
    Whatever happened to overbridges (win win in my book)? I assume that they're too much of a risk with kids throwing stuff off them?
    Probably to expensive, since I moved to Rangivegas there's been another 4 sets of traffic lights go in on the way into Chch which totally fucked the traffic flow in through Belfast/Northwood
    "If you can make black marks on a straight from the time you turn out of a corner until the braking point of the next turn, then you have enough power."


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  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by FJRider View Post
    I try to avoid Otaki ... and have been successful in this regard for some time now ...
    Do you have that post saved in a word document for ease of replying, just paste then insert the appropriate North Island location name. If you don't, maybe you should?

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madness View Post
    Do you have that post saved in a word document for ease of replying, just paste then insert the appropriate North Island location name. If you don't, maybe you should?
    It works for me ...
    When life throws you a curve ... Lean into it ...

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