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Thread: Old Austrian Proverb

  1. #1
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    Old Austrian Proverb

    Women are like a fine wine.

    Best left to mature in a cellar.


    What?? Too soon??
    Quote Originally Posted by rachprice View Post
    Jrandom, You are such a woman hating cunt, if you weren't such a misogynist bastard you might have a better luck with women!

  2. #2
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    um sadly bud, this would be funny
    if it were not for that Austrian woman who just spent the last 24years in that very condition.
    With her children
    Raped by her father, who was the father of the children
    So this in that respect,
    Is bad taste.
    To be old and wise, first you must be young and stupid.

  3. #3
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    Only a Rat can win a Rat Race!

  4. #4
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    Quote Originally Posted by Laava View Post
    Pic removed
    lol.......
    KiwiBitcher
    where opinion holds more weight than fact.

    It's better to not pass and know that you could have than to pass and find out that you can't. Wait for the straight.

  5. #5
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    Great timing I'd say! Top show.

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mully View Post
    Women are like a fine wine.

    Best left to mature in a cellar.


    What?? Too soon??
    LMAO... Tasteless jokes are the best
    Political correctness: a doctrine which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd from the clean end.

  7. #7
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    I'm still laughing.......
    good one.
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  8. #8
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    Since we're getting tasteless here...
    Attached Thumbnails Attached Thumbnails Click image for larger version. 

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  9. #9
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    lol,

    free rent,
    free food,
    free sex,

    ive been paying for all that shit, who's the sucker?

  10. #10
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    Elizabeth Fritzl has just been crowned World Hide and Seek Champion after
    being hidden for 24 years, although some have accused her of cheating as she
    had help from her father.

    Bookings for stag weekends in Vienna have taken a nosedive as it's been
    recently discovered that Austrians really do lock up their daughters.

    A journalist interviewing the Fritzl's neighbour told him that one of the
    daughters was named Alice.. The neighbour replied, "Alice? Alice? Who the
    f*ck is Alice? Do you mean that for 24 years I've been living next door to
    Alice?"
    Political correctness: a doctrine which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd from the clean end.

  11. #11
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    The jokes are doing the rounds thick and fast!

    After it emerged that a man locked his daughter in a cellar for 24 years and inflicted beatings and rape, the world reacted with shock upon hearing the news. All except the Muslim community, who couldn't understand what all the fuss was about.


    Picture the scene; 1984, a supermarket in Austria.
    Josef Fritzl; "Now, Elisabeth, give me a hand with putting these groceries in the trolley."

    Elisabeth; "Up yours, Dad! I'm eighteen! I wanna go to the Wham concert with my friends, then see Ghostbusters at the cinema, and there's nothing you can do about it, old man!"

    Josef; "Just wait 'till I get you home, young lady! You're gonna get such a hiding..."


    Why don't Austrians care whether their lovers are 4, 14 or 40 years old?
    Because one size Fritz-all.


    You know you're hiding a really dirty secret when instead of having skeletons in the closet; you've got inbred children in the cellar...


    I have just seen on TV about that Austrian bloke who imprisoned his daughter, sexually abused her and then fathered 7 kids.
    I think it was called "The Sound of Music".
    ******************************************
    Does that make them the Von Trapped family??


    Austrian, Josef Fritzl, is writing a new book.
    People doubt though whether it will be a best cellar.


    What's Josef Fritzl's favourite chat-up line?
    "Fancy a bit of how's-your-father?"


    To be fair to Josef Fritzl, the Austrian fella, he did put his daughter up for adoption, but the childrens' home in Jersey said their cellar was already full.


    With the Big Brother franchise in constant decline, the makers have turned to Josef Fritzl for a few new ideas.


    So it's been reported that Josef Fritzl is mentally ill.
    Which hospital employed the doctor that diagnosed that, because I'm sure we would all like a nice big salary for stating the fucking obvious!


    Sunday : Stayed in...
    Monday : Stayed in...
    Tuesday : Stayed in...
    Wednesday : Stayed in...
    Thursday : Stayed in...
    An extract from the diary of Elizabeth Fritzl...



    After seeing the news from Austria, Portuguese police have announced plans to look in the cellar under the McCanns' apartment in 2031.


    During the war, when the Nazis were about, it was considered wise for Austrians to hide their kids in the cellar but now it's considered a "bad thing". Times have changed.
    TOP QUOTE: “The problem with socialism is that sooner or later you run out of other people’s money.”

  12. #12
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    This thread is in poor taste - offensive some would say!

    What happens in the family, stays in the family.

    Keep up the good work guys, I had a laugh...
    It is preferential to refrain from the utilisation of grandiose verbiage in the circumstance that your intellectualisation can be expressed using comparatively simplistic lexicological entities. (...such as the word fuck.)

    Remember your humanity, and forget the rest. - Joseph Rotblat

  13. #13
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    "Just when Madeleine McCann had though she had won the european hide and seek championship up pops an Austrian with 24 years under her belt."

  14. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mikkel View Post
    This thread is in poor taste - offensive some would say!
    Yeah!

    Great, innit!
    “- He felt that his whole life was some kind of dream and he sometimes wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it.”

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