A Kiwi
Being a Kiwi is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a
Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a
Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture
and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
Oh and... Only in N.Z. ... can a pizza get to your house
faster than an
ambulance. Only in N.Z. . do supermarkets make sick
people walk all
the way to the back of the shop to get their cough, cold,
aspirin while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in N.Z. ... do people order double cheeseburgers,
large fries and a DIET coke.
Only in N.Z. ... do banks leave both doors open and
chain the pens to the counters.
Only in N.Z. ... do we leave cars worth thousands of
dollars on the
drive and & lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in N.Z. ... do we use answering machines to screen
calls and then
have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone
we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in N.Z. ... are there disabled parking places in
front of a skateboard park. NOT TO MENTION...
3 Kiwis are injured each year testing if a 9v battery
works on their tongue.58 Kiwis are injured each year by using sharp
knives instead of screwdrivers,
31 Kiwis are injured each year by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
8 Kiwis had burns trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Kiwis were admitted to emergency in the
last twoYears after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
and finally.....
In 2005 eight Kiwis cracked their skull whilst throwing
up in the toilet.
Reply With Quote
Originally Posted by Sniper
Bookmarks