What's your sickest joke?

[husaberg]

yes ... it just didn't register until the tomato soup

but you had already read all junipers ones, I am but a mere amateur compared to that sick cat..........

[amberzfire]

but you had already read all junipers ones, I am but a mere amateur compared to that sick cat..........

and I laughed at junipers ones to .. lol not sure what happened there

[husaberg]

and I laughed at jumipers ones to .. lol not sure what happened there

Mommy, Mommy! What's an Oedipus complex?



Shut up son and keep humping!

[Berries]

yes ... it just didn't register until the tomato soup

Get a bit caught in the teeth did we?






Q. What have broccoli and anal sex got in common?
A. If you didn't like it as a kid you probably won't like it as a grown up.

[amberzfire]

Get a bit caught in the teeth did we?

Q. What have broccoli and anal sex got in common?
A. If you didn't like it as a kid you probably won't like it as a grown up.

Pretty much

[5150]

Sick Fucks..... Love your work

[Juniper]

An alcoholic, a priest and a pedophile walk into a bar...
That's just the first guy.

[Juniper]

I was gonna make a joke...


about Princess Diana. But it would have crashed and burned.

[husaberg]

I was gonna make a joke...


about Princess Diana. But it would have crashed and burned.

When you start to be making lady Di jokes I can see where this thread will beheading

[Juniper]

So there was this woman who had no legs and no arms. There was this guy who would always take care of her and she started to fall for him. She tells him, "you know I have never been on a date with anyone." So he takes he out by a lake and puts out a blanket and have a picnic date. Then she tells him, "I have never been kissed before." And to her surprise he leans over and starts making out with her. She starts to really love him and asks for some thing she has always wanted and says, "I have never been fucked before." so he picks her up and throws her into the lake and yells, "you're fucked now!"

[Juniper]

A priest is enjoying a nice stroll through the countryside on a sunny day. Walking by a pond, he hears a small voice crying "help me" "help me". He looks all around and eventually finds the source of the voice. There on a lily pad sits a young green frog. With big pleading eyes the frog looks at the priest and says "please help me". "How can I help you, little frog?" says the priest. "I am not really a frog" says the erm, frog. "I am a 9 year old boy who has been turned into a frog by his evil stepmother, who is a wicked witch." The priest scoops up the little frog and holds it in his hand. "So, what can I do to help you?" he says. "Well, says the frog. The only way to break the spell is if a kind and good man rescues me from the pond, takes me home, kisses me and snuggles up to me in his bed."
'That, your Honour, is the case for the defence.'

[Juniper]

I just got back from the A&E department. I had minor surgery. I had a mole removed from my penis. The doctor said all went well but, if I did that again he'd tell the RSPCA.

At the doctors surgery for a check up. Doctor said "I need a sample of your urine, faeces, sweat and semen."
I said "I need to get to work soon, can I just leave you my underpants?"

Angry man rushes past the receptionist and straight into the doctors surgery, smacks the doctor in the mouth and says "you just fucking watch it with my wife, you fucking pervert!" Doctor, dazed, says "but who is your wife?" Man replies "Mrs. Smithson and you told her she had a nice minge!" Doctor gets up off the floor and says "No Sir, I said she has acute angina!"

[Juniper]

Q. Why is Leutenant Uhuru brown?

A. Cos William Shat'ner.


And, of course, we all know why Mr Spock is like tiolet paper? They both fight Klingons. or They both wipe out Klingons circling Uranus.




Why is the Enterprise funny? Because it has a warped sense of humour.

[husaberg]

A man went to have plastic surgery on his penis. The surgeon examined him and asked, "What happened?"

"Well, doc, I live in a trailer park, and from where I live, I can see this lovely chick next door. She's blonde and she's built like a brickhouse.
She's so horny that every night, I see her take a hot dog from the refrigerator and stick it in a hole in the floor of her trailer. Then she gets down and masturbates herself on the hot dog."

"And?" prompted the doctor.

"Well," said the man, "I felt this was a waste, so one day I got under her trailer and when she put the hot dog in the hole, I removed it and substituted my dick.

"It was a great idea and everything was going real good, too. Then someone knocked at her door, and she jumped off my hot dog and tried to kick it under the stove!"

[husaberg]