Young death - Donations

[Mrs Busa Pete]

Good morning Anika hope you had a good day yesterday. I have to go down to the shore on Friday and was wondering if you would like to go for a coffee i can pick you up and maybe go into takapuna. Just send me a pm .

Take Care love Wendy

[Waxxa]

Good morning Anika hope you had a good day yesterday. I have to go down to the shore on Friday and was wondering if you would like to go for a coffee i can pick you up and maybe go into takapuna. Just send me a pm .

Take Care love Wendy

Nice one

[Ypawa]

Good morning Anika hope you had a good day yesterday. I have to go down to the shore on Friday and was wondering if you would like to go for a coffee i can pick you up and maybe go into takapuna. Just send me a pm .

Take Care love Wendy

your awesome wendy

[Dutchee]

Hey anika, how's it going?
I was reading a magazine yesterday, and the article was almost about you. She's an Australian girl who lost her partner through a car accident on the day of her daughter's birth. He died just after the birth (as in a minute or so) - laying in hospital while she was in labour. The daughter is now a teen, I think, and knows all about her dad.
We're all still here for you, you just need to phone or pm.
I hope you and Wendy had a nice coffee.
I also hope you being quiet at the moment means you're venting elsewhere, and not bottling it all up.
Take care & we're thinking of you still.
Michelle

[alexm]

hi guys..
I'm pretty much doing worse..the only thing I can say is better is that I dont cry all day only at night..but I think its more cause I have no tears left. Everyday is harder without him.I miss him more with everyday.I havent been able to see anyone except my friends, I cant do anything without him even putting petrol in my car and grocery shopping.I feel like a bad mum cause I dont feel like taking care of Connor right now, but I am anyway.I'm tired,exhausted..tomorrow is my first whole day alone with Connor and I dont know if I'm gonna handle it.I've started packing up the house which is hard I cant stay there longer than an hour at a time and I havent been able to pack up our bedroom..I know I cant live there now cause its too sad but at the same time I dont want to let the house go cause theres lots of good memories there..but its too late now anyway. I would still very much like to be with alex, dont want to go on anymore and dont want to start a new life without alex..and please dont call the cops cause I still feel that way apparently its a normal part of grieving..anyway this has turned into a very long post..thanks for listening

[MadDuck]

..thanks for listening

Thats what we are here for. I have the day off tomorrow so if you need some company send me a PM.

[Tink]

hi guys..
..thanks for listening

It is a huge part of grieving... you take these good ladies words, and trust them.. they are a shoulder that understands.. .and Connor will be safe with them... time heals all wounds.. but love will never cease. hugs

[Mom]

..thanks for listening

Exhaustion and tiredness and tears are a normal part of being a new Mommy with a small baby love, let alone dealing with the death of your beloved Alex as well. You are doing so well, thank you for sharing

[jono035]

thanks for listening

Thank you for sharing.

I'm sure there are a heap of people (like me) watching this thread and leaving the commenting to those better suited to offering advice and support, but our thoughts are with you all the same.

[boman]

Speaking from personal experience, don't try to pack up the house by yourself. It is hard. There are so many memories there, and reliving those memoties in your present state of mind is very hard. Is there someone, or group of someones who can assist you in packing. I still live in the house, me and my late wife bought. 16 months down the road things are getting a bit easier. Her family came and moved my wife out, pretty much straight away. It made living here a little bit easier, but you still retain the memories, both happy and sad. Nothing can change what has happend, all you can do is carry on living, one day at a time. Like I said in another post.

Time is a healer. It just takes time.

Take care, and please keep posting, no matter how trivial you think it is. There are a LOT of people looking forward to hearing from you.

[Pedrostt500]

Speaking from personal experience, don't try to pack up the house by yourself. It is hard. There are so many memories there, and reliving those memoties in your present state of mind is very hard. Is there someone, or group of someones who can assist you in packing. I still live in the house, me and my late wife bought. 16 months down the road things are getting a bit easier. Her family came and moved my wife out, pretty much straight away. It made living here a little bit easier, but you still retain the memories, both happy and sad. Nothing can change what has happend, all you can do is carry on living, one day at a time. Like I said in another post.

Time is a healer. It just takes time.

Take care, and please keep posting, no matter how trivial you think it is. There are a LOT of people looking forward to hearing from you.

What he said X2, I had to pack up a Girl friends flat after she died, it was tough, one of the toughest things I've done, I still every now and then during private moments shed a tear or two for her, and yes I still love her though she is gone, it does get better with time.

[davebullet]

Don't worry about wee Connor. You are his mum and that's all he needs to know You are going through a lot and sounds like there are a lot of decisions you are either having to make or needing to make which adds to the stress and sadness of it all. I don't know how much sleep you are managing to get (I'm guessing not a lot) and lack of sleep with everything else won't leave you with any energy. Save your strength for you and if you need landlords or others to help you out / give you time, ask them. A little help is the least we all can do.

[Sharry]

We are here to listen Anika, thank you for sharing

Just being a new mum will bring emotions and exhaustion, just know that what you are feeling is ok. You are very normall in your response to what you have experienced.
Are you able to stay with someone such as your parents for a few days and then return to the house with them?
Deciding wether or not to stay or pack anything are not decisions to be forced. Take your time and talk to your family to help yourself process your decisions.

Just take one day at a time Anika

[alexm]

Hi Guys,
Yea I really didnt want to pack up the house so early..but for some reason until I have the death certificate WINZ has decided to only give me $190 a week even though I'm missing $400 a wekk now..so that really doesnt pay the rent and I dont want to use up savings in Connors account on rent.And I'm still trying to organise my ACC payments they sent out the wrong forms first time round. Dont feel up to organising all of that stuff either I've only been back to the house twice for an hour at a time before it got too much..went into our bedroom and lay on his pillow and just cried cause it felt like he was still living there. And this sunday is our one year anniversary I dont know what I'm gonna do I would like to go down to his grave in Tauranga but my mum wants to pack up the rest of the stuff in the house..which is only the bedroom left to do so its gonna be a really fun anniversary alone..packing up our things..on the day I'm pretty sure he was gonna propose 2 me.what to do.

[Oakie]

...but for some reason until I have the death certificate WINZ has decided to only give me $190 a week .

Just their bureaucracy. They need a death cert number to make it official blah blah blah. Hopefully you'll get payments backdated. Just keep at it Anika and everything will come to pass in time. I know it doesn't make it any easier at the moment but try not to waste your energy on getting pissed off with them.